So...a few days after we bought our minivan (used of course); We made the trip to town (A good half hour drive) on a Tuesday evening to get a family portrait, and pictures of each of the boys. Owen being only a few months old at the time.
Well when we got there, there was no record of our appointment...at least not for Tuesday..it was on Wednsday.
Well the older boys already took over the waiting room, and LIsa was nursing the baby, so they were kind enough to stay open and take our pictures after the last appointment; acctually the people booked for the last appointment offered us their spot, but we declined (Canada eh?)--I took everyone down for a snack at the Tim Hortons
The girl (and I mean Girl..she may have been eighteen) took the Baby's photo first...not bad, he's propped up on his elbows, drooling a little.
Next it was Adam (5) We had to get him sitting down, because standing up, he would not keep his hands out of the front of his pants.
Then came Isaac's turn (7). Somehow he found out that one of the backgrounds was called the 'Misty Forest'...Isaac being a fan of the Hobbit, and Harry Potter, really REALLY wanted the Misty Forest, which turned out to be nothing more than a smeared dark green backdrop. That didn't stop him though, he wanted his picture to be of him 'Walking' through the misty forest. So the poor girl just kept snapping away as we kept walking back and forth in front of this backdrop, trying to look casual, but still smiling, and looking at the camera, like he's auditioning for a spot in next season's Sears Catalouge.
Next came the Three boys together....Owen would not stop crying until we took all of his clothes off; Adam wouldn't keep his hand out of his pants, and Isaac was upset about the lack of trees in his own picture..we managed to get one shot with Owen in a prop bucket, and the other two kneeling beside it.
(uggh) the Family Portrait...Owen was rolling around crying and pulling out of Lisa's arms, Adam just wouldn't stop digging at his crotch , "Adam will you get your hands out of your friggin' pants?" "But they're itchy daddy!" Isaac just decided to be Mister Difficult, "Isaac sweetie, can you stand over here next to your daddy? Oh okay, next to your mom then? Can you stand up? No stand up. Okay you can kneel then....no don't sit right down. Okay can you kneel next to your brother....no no, don't stand next to your father...can you come over to this side, no THIS side. Can you not sit down please?..." meanwhile. Owen is beyond all repair, and Adam starts complaining about how he doesn't ffeel good, and wants to go home. So from out side the room it sounds like this:
Anyone who's had portraits done, know that once the pictures are done, you still have to hagn around while they go through the five dozen or so shots that they took and pick out the best ones, and then yuou have to pick the package you want...surprisingly, they didn't try to up-sell us on anything.Isaac sweetie, can you stand over here....Andrew can you do something with Owen...Daddy, I don't feel good...Listen, he wants you, he's just crying at me....Can you stand up?...Adam PLEASE get your hands out of your pants....oh Owewn what's the matter....can you come over to this side....I don't care if you want to go home, can you take your hands out of your pants....Isaac, she asked you to KNeel...Adam we'll go home as soon as we're done....NO no Isaac, can you stand over HERE...I don't know, maybe he needs his diaper changed...Daddy, why is mommy crying?...Lis, let's just come back another time.
Well out in the parkinglot, daddy finally lost it.
"What's the matter with you two? Your mother just wanted a family portrait...one picture to hang up on the wall, and Isaac you had to do the exact opposite of what the photographer asked...she askes you to stand up, you sit down, she asks you to move left, you move right...and you Adam, you had to stand there and scratch your nuts the whole time?"
The drive home was worse.
Our new car started humming progresily worse and worse from the one of the front tires. I told Lisa not to worry about it; that it's bad bearing, and I'll pick one up tomorrow..well it kept getting worse and worse..bad enough that we could actually hear it above the baby crying. I kept trying to reasure Lisa that it sounded worse than it is, and that the whell's not going to fall off or anything--about halfway home, I wasn't so sure. I wasn't to far from my parents house, so I pulled off the highway and went there, and was going to borrow his car until I fixed mine. We got there, and Lisa had to nurse the baby, so we all went in (it's about 9:00 pm by now..a good hour and a hlaf past the boys' bedtime) Adam didn't wake up, even when I carried him into my parents bedroom..I then felt his forehead and he was burning up; somehwere in the 102 range I'd say.
We got home around 10:00 Adam's fever went down the next day..and once I fixed my wheel (which by the way..it wasn't the bearing, it was the wheel nuts...three of them were gone so tire was about to fall off) everything went back to normal...but we can't look at the photo of the three of them (Owen in the bucket) without laughing.
PS-We obviously never got the Family portrait...**sigh** maybe next year.
