If you go to visit Malawi, please don't fart.

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Phantasm
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If you go to visit Malawi, please don't fart.

Post by Phantasm »

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-12363852
Malawi row over whether new law bans farting
The justice minister said local chiefs would deal with those caught breaking wind in public




Two of Malawi's most senior judicial officials are arguing over whether a new bill includes a provision that outlaws breaking wind in public.

Justice Minister George Chaponda says the new bill would criminalise flatulence to promote "public decency".

"Just go to the toilet when you feel like farting," he told local radio.

However, he was directly contradicted by Solicitor General Anthony Kamanga, who says the reference to "fouling the air" means pollution.

"How any reasonable or sensible person can construe the provision to criminalising farting in public is beyond me," he said, adding that the prohibition contained in the new law has been in place since 1929.

The Local Courts Bill, to be introduced next week reads: "Any person who vitiates the atmosphere in any place so as to make it noxious to the public to the health of persons in general dwelling or carrying on business in the neighbourhood or passing along a public way shall be guilty of a misdemeanour."

Mr Chaponda, a trained lawyer, insists that this includes farting.

"Would you be happy to see people farting anyhow?" he asked on the popular "Straight Talk" programme on Malawi's Capital Radio.

He said that local chiefs would deal with any offenders.

When asked whether it could be enforced, he said it would be similar to laws banning urinating in public.

That rules out the local curry house for dinner then. ;)
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Re: If you go to visit Malawi, please don't fart.

Post by rdhopeca »

When asked whether it could be enforced, he said it would be similar to laws banning urinating in public.
One wonders what physical evidence will be presented at trial.
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Phantasm
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Post by Phantasm »

Wouldn't it be wonderful if farts were coloured :biggrin:

Especially if they were different colours depending on the type of fart.

Maybe blue for a wet one, green for a windy but non smelly one, and black for a "silent but violent" one.
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Post by JazFusion »

Thou who hath smelt it, dealt it.
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Post by lurch »

There is opportunity here. The suggestion of colour is close to it. I've suggested for some years now,,that the scientists at places like GenTech and other genetic laboratories come up with a genetically altered microbe, of the kind that do reside in human intestines and do cause so much of the methane production that becomes what is commonly referred to as " fart",,to come up with a " rose " fart. Yes the microbe be engineered to produce odor of Rose, or banana or whatever..Custom Farts any one of distinction would be proud to let loose at ..diner party,,at the opera,,weddings..bar mitzvas,,christianings. Ramadan.any where any time,,sweeten up the elevator with your co-workers,,Your Boss!..while giving a speech at the U.N...in front of 5th grade class opening up a whole new way of expressing ones self at the local Montessori school. Yes folks, for only a teaspoon a day,,never be embarrassed or caught repugnant or out side the Law again!!..Now available in 5 assorted scents..No need to blame the dog any more. Be Proud! Your dog will thank You!....


See..why didn't the lawyer think this up instead of wanting to arrest people for it..ya know what I mean?
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Post by sgt.null »

silent but violent is a great name for a band.

and no one should complain about my postings after this gasser of a thread.
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