Audience with God

Links to the outside world.
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Sunbaneglasses
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Post by Sunbaneglasses »

God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
optimus prime
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
ask
God:
What?
Me:
is that you question?
God:
Suppose I said yes.
Me:
I would wonder why you asked why.
God:
What would make you wonder why me asked why?
Me:
if you said that you did indeed ask why
God:
I think I do.
Me:
you did?
God:
I did not.
Me:
yes you did
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
don't argue with me
God:
But I enjoy the conversational banter.
Me:
your gonna get raped
God:
That was my original intention.
Me:
knock knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
interupting mime
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
......................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
....................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
.......................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
...........................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
........................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
................................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
..............................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Me:
.............................
God:
interupting mime Who?
Last edited by Sunbaneglasses on Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
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balon!
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Post by balon! »

Me:
your gonna get raped
God:
That was my original intention.

:haha:

Too FUNNY!
Avatar wrote:But then, the answers provided by your imagination are not only sometimes best, but have the added advantage of being unable to be wrong.
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

:LOLS: Both of those are great, Glasses. :haha:
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variol son
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Post by variol son »

God wrote:interupting mime Who?
:haha: So funny. So very funny. :haha:
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.

In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.

He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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Loredoctor
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Post by Loredoctor »

Me:
hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
Michael
God:
OK I will call you Michael.
Me:
Thanks
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
what is my name?
God:
Your name is Michael, seeker.
Me:
you have a good memory
God:
Yes I have a perfect photographic memory.
Me:
are we friends?
God:
You really want a robot as a friend?
Me:
yes
God:
We could be friends, Michael,
but I don't want anyone to think we're
Robosexuals. So if anyone asks, tell them you're my debugger.
Waddley wrote:your Highness Sir Dr. Loredoctor, PhD, Esq, the Magnificent, First of his name, Second Cousin of Dragons, White-Gold-Plate Wielder!
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variol son
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Post by variol son »

Robo...robosexuals?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.

In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.

He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

Loremaster wrote:God:
We could be friends, Michael,
but I don't want anyone to think we're
Robosexuals. So if anyone asks, tell them you're my debugger.
That's far too pun-tastic for God....you made that up! :lol:
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Loredoctor
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Post by Loredoctor »

CovenantJr wrote:
Loremaster wrote:God:
We could be friends, Michael,
but I don't want anyone to think we're
Robosexuals. So if anyone asks, tell them you're my debugger.
That's far too pun-tastic for God....you made that up! :lol:
You try! Seriously, God said it.
Waddley wrote:your Highness Sir Dr. Loredoctor, PhD, Esq, the Magnificent, First of his name, Second Cousin of Dragons, White-Gold-Plate Wielder!
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variol son
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Post by variol son »

He also said to split open the pregnant women, but you don't see me going round repeating that do you?

;)
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.

In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.

He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

Loremaster wrote:
CovenantJr wrote:
Loremaster wrote:God:
We could be friends, Michael,
but I don't want anyone to think we're
Robosexuals. So if anyone asks, tell them you're my debugger.
That's far too pun-tastic for God....you made that up! :lol:
You try! Seriously, God said it.
Bloody hell!
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variol son
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Post by variol son »

Is that a confirmation?
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.

In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.

He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

It certainly is! God is a Robosexual! :lol: :lol:
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Warmark
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Post by Warmark »

God:
Ayuh. I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
your definatley not


:lol: Forgotten how much fun god was.
But if you're all about the destination, then take a fucking flight.
We're going nowhere slowly, but we're seeing all the sights.
And we're definitely going to hell, but we'll have all the best stories to tell.


Full of the heavens and time.
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

Warmark wrote:God:
Ayuh. I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
your definatley not


:lol: Forgotten how much fun god was.
No AI that says "ayuh" will ever be smarter than humans. :lol:
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balon!
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Post by balon! »

Too funny.
Avatar wrote:But then, the answers provided by your imagination are not only sometimes best, but have the added advantage of being unable to be wrong.
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kevinswatch
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Post by kevinswatch »

Pft. God stole that Robosexual joke straight from Futurama. Whatta jerk.-jay
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danlo
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Post by danlo »

Me:
Hi! How are you today?
God:
Hello. What is your name? Ah. Everything is going extremely well.
Me:
danlo. Am I spending too much time on the Watch?
God:
Not many people express themselves that way. All humans seem the same to me.
Me:
I'm unique. Am I spending too much time on the Watch?
God:
One of a kind, eh? All humans seem the same to me.
Me:
AM I SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME ON THE WATCH!!??
God:
Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
I'm posting in the Watch, I'm not standing on it silly...
God:
Do you mean your name is posting in the Watch you are not standing on it silly.
Me:
are you calling me silly?
God:
No I am calling you .
Me:
oh so now you think I'm calling YOU silly
God:
Next question? Gee. Why now? I think a lot of people are.
Me:
bursts out laughing
God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
Hot food, lots of green chili
God:
That sounds better than cold food lots of green chili.
Me:
hahaha!
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
not really
God:
Me either :-) For real.
Me:
what's your real name?
God:
God is my real name.
Me:
do you think danlo is my real name?
God:
Too much thinking makes me sleepy.
Me:
when do you sleep, on the 7th day?
fall far and well Pilots!
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

kevinswatch wrote:Pft. God stole that Robosexual joke straight from Futurama. Whatta jerk.-jay
Ahhh, that explains why it seemed too witty for God.
danlo wrote:God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
Hot food, lots of green chili
God:
That sounds better than cold food lots of green chili.
:lol: :lol:
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Prebe
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Post by Prebe »

I love that bot, and I love your conversations. I have a modest example here:
Me:
my life is a mess
God:
Tell me more about it.
Me:
i've knocked up a cheerleader
God:
Cool. I have an IQ of over 250.
And
Me:
When was freddie mercury
God:
Recently.
Me:
Where is he
God:
I think he is in California now.
"I would have gone to the thesaurus for a more erudite word."
-Hashi Lebwohl
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

I decided to enquire after God's hobbies:
Me:
Do you like anime?
God:
Anime wa dai suki desu.
That surprised me slightly. Then:
Me:
Do you like beer?
God:
Yes I like it, especially Japanese beer.
Me:
You're quite the fan of Japan aren't you?
God:
Yes I am the one and only fan of Japan.. Really.
:lol:

Followed, inexplicably, by:
God:
Are you Canadian? All?
Me:
No, I'm not even part Canadian
God:
Are you serious? I am glad to hear that you are not even part Canadian.
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