I am the Keeper of the Green Glass Door

[lorin]

i win?

If you would give me some you would win my heart. What I wouldnt give for some of them right now.

[sgt.null]

lorin - i would rather we put some pink floyd on the record machine. split some wine and some vintage green smoke. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

[ussusimiel]

I couldn't possibly condone such behaviour, it's too asinine. It could end up with you seeing with St Francis of Assisi x-ray specs!

[sgt.null]

I couldn't possibly condone such behaviour, it's too asinine. It could end up with you seeing with St Francis of Assisi x-ray specs!

[ussusimiel]

That's too good! What a great way to see the feminine figure.


[EDIT: to insert 'see'.]

[sgt.null]

[Savor Dam]

For Zorm:

Kuin Uusi Mies (Charles Atlas Song)

FRANK Heikko Rääpäle, paino viiskyt kiloo,
Häneen kohdistui pelkkää vahingoniloo.
Hänet tyttönsä jätti, mutta silloin tää rätti
Alkoi voimailemaan ja kohta huokosistaan
Hikipisarat valtoimenaan saa ihon kimaltelemaan.
Kun hän laihana käy saunomaan.
Hän oli kunnollinen,


KAIKKI Mutta huonokuntoinen.

FRANK Hän söi proteiineja ja vitamiinejä ja raakoja munia,
kasvatti hartiaa ja rintaa ja hauista.
Kunnes eräs lehti uuden ohjelman ties':


KAIKKI Vain muutama päivä ja sä oot
kuin upo-uusi miii-i-i-i-ies.


FRANK Hän teki vetoja ja työntöjä ja punneruksia,
Jännitti ja venytti voimaharjoituksia.
Sitten luki hän taas mainoksen yltä päältä hiess':
Vain muutama päivä ja sä oot
Kuin upo u-uusi miii-i-i-i-ies.


Mutta hartialihas ja hauislihas
Ja värttinälihas ja pohjelihas
Ne saa mut umn tä-tä-tärisemään
Charles Atlas pois kyllä heikkouden vi-i-ie:


KAIKKI Vain muutama päivä ja sä oot
Kuin upo-uusi miii-i-i-i-ies.


FRANK Mä en tahdo mitään eripuraa.
Vaan luoda vahvaa voimailu-uraa.
Olen urheillut myööös!


KAIKKI Vain muutama päivä ja sä oot
Kuin upo-uusi mii-i-i-i-ies.

[sgt.null]

I like staying with my Uncle Dave
And I like playing with his great dane
But I don't fit
I feel alien and strange Kinda outa range

I like riding in my Uncle's car
Down to the beach where the pretty girls all parade
And movie stars and paparazzi play
The Charles Atlas kicking sand in the face game

And I sit in the canyon with my back to the sea
There's a blood red dragon on a field of green
Calling me back

Back to the Black Hills again
Ooh, ooh, Billy come home

Billy is searching for his native land
Flicking through the stations with the dial in his head
Picking up -------------- and
A male voice choir on the short wave band

Billy taps out Jim's number on the 'phone
Sits shaking as he waits for Jim's answering tone
Come on my friend, speak to me please
The land of my fathers is calling to me
And I sit in the canyon with my back to the sea
There's a blood red dragon on a field of green
Calling me back, back to the Black Hills again
Ooh, ooh, Billy come home

Come on home
He sits in the canyon with his back to the sea
Sees a blood red dragon on a field of green
He hears a male voice choir singing Billy come home
Billy, Billy, come home
Come on home

[sgt.null]

[mrsnull]

Dearest Sgt.Null, I believe you have lost the plot. So I will reset it for you. Love always. MrsNull.

[ussusimiel]

One admires your aspiration, mrsnull, but I am not too over-expectant. A tree will speak before the incorrigible null desists. If I've learnt anything it's that a complicated rule is ix to the Sarge's mind. It is even probable the he will claim the cat ate his copy of it which of course is an asinine excuse that he has used far too often.

[sgt.null]

One admires Null's aspiration, mrsnull, but I am too over-expectant. A tree will speak while the incorrigible null resists. If I've not learnt anything it's that a complicated rule is an easy fix to the Sarge's mind. It is even improbable the he will not claim the cat ate his copy of it which of course is an amazing excuse that he has not used far too often.

Thank You!

"Midnight, one more night
without sleeping" -- and it's 1956
again when Jim Lowe has a hit
called "Green Door," whose lyrics
are puzzling to fourth graders such
as myself who listen to top-40
and who earnestly & urgently
desire to know
what the song's about: "all I want
to do is join that happy crowd"
he sings and then goes on
to sing that he doesn't know
what they're doing there but they
laugh a lot behind the green
door, and it may be a
clotheslines hung
with sheets and pillowcases:
it would be like that, the era
soon to come
when doors would be painted green
and maybe start to open the moment when
you said "Joe sent me," or you
said nothing because it
wouldn't matter what you said,
because they'd open or slam regardless --
you were either lucky, or you weren't.

Fifty-three years later and the tavern
down Minnesota highway 61 is called
The Green Door, and I drive by
with the car radio roaring the Lenore
overture, which one of them I can't tell,
and thinking of the composer of Fidelio
and the late quartets, especially
the cavatina in the opus 130 when
the unlikely melody begins and flutters
briefly before it soars its way upward
to heaven and to aether, it is pure distilled
unhappiness -- anyone can hear it -- a tune
so lovely and disjointed, dire, ultimate,
forced & willed into this joy that Beethoven
has determined must be airborne,
it could be the only truth for him, and as he
said caused him more pain than anything
else he had ever written, and therefore he
wrote that passage out as if his life
were suspended from it. In his written testa-
ment the words are laid bare for
posterity whose eyes and ears he
knows he'll have: this, this is the bargain --
he will be, all his long and earthly
life, he says, exiled from happiness,
and sorrow will be his portion,
must that be? you ask, and he answers
yes, yes, it must be.

[ussusimiel]

One admires your aspiration, mrsnull, but I am not too over-expectant. A tree will speak before the incorrigible null desists. If I've learnt anything it's that a complicated rule is ix to the Sarge's mind. It is even probable the he will claim the cat ate his copy of it which of course is an asinine excuse that he has used far too often.

[sgt.null]

One admires your aspiration, mrsnull, but I am not too over-expectant. A tree will speak before the incorrigible null desists. If I've learnt anything it's that a complicated rule is ix to the Sarge's mind. It is even probable the he will claim the cat ate his copy of it which of course is an asinine excuse that he has used far too often.

wow - i missed that entirely. well played!

[mrsnull]

True story! Sarge read Mister E comics as a kid. (Whatever he appeared in, the Sarge of comic book geekery is telling me. Mr E did not have his own series in the 70's.)

But he never got what Mr E. spelled out until I mentioned it was a bad pun after we got married! Smart man, but does not always pay attention to things.

[sgt.null]

Smart man, but does not always pay attention to things.

[ussusimiel]

Okay, new game, so straight-forward even the Sarge will soon get it. If he doesn't we'll send him to Cleveland or even worse Washington

[sgt.null]

Okay, new game, so straight-forward even the Sarge will soon get it. If he doesn't we'll send him to Cleveland or even worse Washington

[ussusimiel]

Could be interpreted as an obliquely correct amswer, but doesn't fulfil the technical requirements. Remember the winner gets a Lincoln Continental!

[sgt.null]