As the World Burns!!! A Kevins Watch SOAP!

Book 1 of the Last Chronicles of Thomas Covenant

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Jerico
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As the World Burns!!! A Kevins Watch SOAP!

Post by Jerico »

Love triangle? LOL
"Like sand through the hourglass, these are the days in the Land"

I think i'm gonna be sick :roll:
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Post by MrKABC »

Jerico wrote:Love triangle? LOL
"Like sand through the hourglass, these are the days in the Land"

I think i'm gonna be sick :roll:
Well, Liand *was* dropping by Linden's room in Revelstone... ogling her in the form-fitting towels, noting the way her "wheaten tresses" fell across her silky thighs... ;)
"This is the grace that has been given to you - to bear what must be borne."
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Post by IVB »

MrKABC wrote:
Jerico wrote:Love triangle? LOL
"Like sand through the hourglass, these are the days in the Land"

I think i'm gonna be sick :roll:
Well, Liand *was* dropping by Linden's room in Revelstone... ogling her in the form-fitting towels, noting the way her "wheaten tresses" fell across her silky thighs... ;)
Linden: Thomas! I…. I thought you were dead.
TC: I was, but I got better, but that is not important right now. I love you we can be together again.
Linden: I… don’t know what to say… It’s been 10 years… I have been lonely. I am only only human…
TC: What are you trying to say?
Linden: I’ve met someone. <sob> I never meant to hurt you… It’s the land, he was so healthy, and there was hurtloam and alanthia. Before I knew what was happening we were rolling in the grass.
TC: Who is it? Please don’t say Anele…
Linden: No, why would it matter if it was…
TC: No reason….
Linden: What is it… You can lie to me, my healthsense doubles as a BS detector… What is it?
TC: <shuffling uneasily> Right before we left on the Drommond, Hollin and Sunder had an argument… I… comforted her… It was just one time, I swear!
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Post by Jerico »

IVB Great post :Hail:
If the books turn out anything like this. The universe (not only the world) may be truly over.
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Post by Jerico »

Make sure to join us for the continuing story of love, lust, and wild magic next week in the continuing saga "As the World Burns"

Couldn't resist :D
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Post by IVB »

Jerico wrote:Make sure to join us for the continuing story of love, lust, and wild magic next week in the continuing saga "As the World Burns"

Couldn't resist :D
Preview of next week...

TC: I just can't belive it! I waited for 3000 years and she hooks up with the first buff stonedowner she meets!
The Voice: I am sure he could have an "accident" if you so desire boss... Revelstone has many floors and the Mahdoubt could be lax in managing her mop water....
TC: hey... speaking of the Mahdoubt, is she seeing anyone?
The Voice: Um, I don't think so.... But ur-Lord don't you think you should hold off for a bit... Your breeding record is not that great. Three kids and none of them were all "there"... Besides, isnt she a bit old for you?
TC: Old for me? I am 3000 years old!
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Post by Alynna Lis Eachann »

Wait, three kids??

Man, this really is a soap opera.
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Post by IVB »

Alynna Lis Eachann wrote:Wait, three kids??

Man, this really is a soap opera.
Read the 5th post. In "As the World Burns" (thanks Jerico) Anele is TC and Hollin's love child.

There is so much material to work with here:

TC: Your, right. The Mahdoubt is not right for me... perhaps I should just give up on women. But it's been 3500 years... I am a man... I have needs. How do your people stand being away from women so long?
The Voice: It was hard for the Bloodguard and those who followed Brinn, but we have learned over the centuries. For long deployments in the Land we select those who will not miss the company of women.
TC: I think I understand....
The Voice: Then you should know, no Master would treat you poorly as The Chosen has...<wink>



And yes this is silly, but it is so much fun!
Last edited by IVB on Thu Jan 20, 2005 5:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Creator »

IVB wrote: TC: ... How do your people stand being away from women so long?
The Voice: It was hard for the Bloodguard and those how followed Brinn, but we have learned over the centuries. For long deployments in the Land we select those who will not miss the company of women.
TC: I think I understand....
The Voice: Then you should know, no Master would treat you poorly as The Chosen has...<wink>
OMG - The Master's are Mistresses too!!! :haha: :haha: :haha:
He/She who dies with the most toys wins! Wait a minute ... I can't die!!!
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Post by IVB »

Meanwhile, on the upland plateau Esmer walks with Anele..

Esmer: Hey, Anele check out the nice boulder by the clump of grass.

Anele moves to inspect the rock and is immediately possessed by Lord Foul.
LF: It's about time! We need to talk.
Esmer: Your damn right we do. What's going on with the Unbeliever? Was that you who brought him back?
LF: <pause>No, I thought that was you doing your “balance” thing...
Esmer: Nope. I don't like the way this is turning out. he beat you twice. And what about Avery's brat? I thought you were using him to control her?
LF: Now wait a minute. He beat me once. If you recall I killed him the last time. But lets get back to that and the kid latter. We had a deal! I helped bust your grandpa out of jail. You were supposed to get Avery to break the Law of Time. What happened?
Esmer: Hey, I set it up. She made the trip, how was I supposed to know she could pull it off? Listen, I have to go talk to the Demondim, they are pissed as well and I have to go smooth things over.. It may take a while they are starting to think I am mushrooming them. Well talk latter.

Esmer moves away.

LF: I he gone?
Anele: Yes.
LF: The staff was supposed to stay out of circulation, why did you put it where the Waynhim could find it.. I mean you hid it next door to their rysh! What are you playing at?
Anele: Let's just say I am keeping my options open. There is another interested party involved now...
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Post by 10k Gold Wielder »

OOOO, the suspense is terrible!! I hope it lasts!

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Post by IVB »

In Linden's room, Liand wearing only a loincloth is doing inclined one armed push-ups while Linden watches mesmerized.

Linden: I could do this all day.
Liand: Shouldn't .... we..... do ..... something ..... about ..... the ...... Demondim?
Linden: Don't worry about that dear, just concentrate on what you do well.

Covenant enters the room with the Voice and the Humbled in tow.

TC: OK, Linden we need to put are differences behind us and deal with this situation.
Linden: I agree, the Land comes first. Wait a minute, there is something different about you.... I sense it. Stylish clothes. fresh manicure. Do I detect product in your hair?
TC: Listen, I need my ring back now
Linden: Sure, here you go.

She hands him the ring. And TC puts it on.

The Voice: See, I told you that shirt would go well with White Gold.
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Post by Creator »

OMG !!! Is there a spring in TC's steps?!!!
He/She who dies with the most toys wins! Wait a minute ... I can't die!!!
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Post by IVB »

Thomas Covenant, Linden, Liand, Stave, the Ramen, and senior Master cadre are all gathered in the Close to hammer out a strategy to deal with the current threats.

TC: I see that nearly everyone is here. Where is Anele?
The Voice: He is in the Mahdoubt's quarters. He mentioned something about teaching her to read “The Rock.”
TC: I see... Where is Jeremiah?
Linden: I sent him down to the stables to play with the horses while I had some “mommy” time.
TC: That was two days ago...
Linden: Hey, I have ten years to make up for.
TC: Bloody hell! I was dead! How many times can I say I am sorry? The freakin Despiser blasted me with Wild Magic! Can we move on now?
Linden: Sure. So what was it like being dead?
TC: Kida cool. You like knew everything and could royally screw with the living. But the other Dead, they were such pains in the ass. Keven could not get over that I beat Lord Foul twice.

From a distance, Anele's muffled Lord Foul voice yells: “JUST ONCE! YOU BEAT ME ONE TIME ONLY! THE LAST ONE DOES NOT COUNT!!”

Covenant pauses then continues..

TC: And Trell and Atarian, God! talk about holding a grudge... And I wish Lena would have picked her hot young body to spend eternity in..
Stave: Can we focus here. The Demondim, remember?
TC: Right. So what can we do?
Linden: You are the Wild magic, go blast them.
TC: There's a problem, I am back to needing a trigger again...
Linden: Great! I bet you can't even get it up without Venom can you?

Liand snickers, and Linden knocks him on the head with the Staff of Law.

Linden: I meant the Wild Magic, idiot.
Liand: Sorry, Mistress Chosen.

TC: Just let me use the staff as a trigger.
Linden: No way, remember what happened last time?
TC: OK, OK.. This is Revelstone, there has to be old implements of power laying around...
The Voice: Well, we did find Damelon's Codpiece in Keven's Closet. But we do not know if the Lore is still potent. And it is Earthpower. It can lead to desecration. We will not permit its use.

Stay tuned...
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Post by ur-James »

This is absolutely hilarious stuff!!!

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Post by IVB »

Still with no resolution to the Demondim threat, Linden and Thomas take a break from deliberations to catch up.

TC: It’s good seeing you again. Man, was I surprised when I found out you adopted a son. Where did you find him? And with a ‘half-hand’ as well.
Linden: Well, you would not recognize him after 10 years. He was one of the kids from the bonfire.
TC: <goes pale>That’s Marsha Jason’s kid? And he is what 15 in your time line?
Linden: Yes…..
TC: Five years before you moved to town. Marsha was my housekeeper at Haven Farm. We had an affair, her husband found out and things went down hill from there. She said the boy was mine but did not want him or anybody to know his father was a leper….
Linden: I don’t believe this! Why can you keep it in your pants! I thought you were impotent in the real world.
TC: I volunteered for some early drug testing for the FDA. If I remember correctly one of the drugs was something called Viagra.
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Post by 10k Gold Wielder »

Man, I sure hope he signed a Consent Form!

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Post by IVB »

Back in the conference room, every one as returned from the break to continue discussions. Anele enters the room with a roll of sod in his arms.

Anele: Unbeliever, um Dad, someone wants to talk to you.

Anele unrolls the sod on the floor and steps onto and is possessed by Lord Foul.

Lord Foul: Mister Covenant! Did you get my package, Jeremiah?
TC: Yeah.
Lord Foul: Well, good.
Stave: Lord Foul….
The Voice: Whoever it is, he's not reading like a raver.
Lord Foul: Surprised to see me?
TC: No.
Lord Foul: Then you're aware of it.
TC: Of what?
Lord Foul: Our connection. I don't fully understand how it happened. Perhaps some part of you imprinted onto me, something overwritten or copied. That is at this point irrelevant, what matters is that whatever happened, happened for a reason.
TC: And what reason is that?
Lord Foul: I killed you, Mister Covenant, I watched you die... With a certain satisfaction, I might add, and then something happened. Something that I knew was impossible, but it happened anyway. You stopped me, Mister Covenant. And now here I stand because of you, Mister Covenant, because of you I'm still trapped here in this place, but because of you I've changed, I know my limitations, a new man, so to speak.
TC: Congratulations.
Lord Foul: Thank you. But as you well know, appearances can be deceiving, which brings me back to the reason why we're here. We're not here because we're free, we're here because we're not free. There's no escaping reason, no denying freedom - because as we both know, without freedom, we would not exist.
Lord Foul: I am here because of you, Mister Covenant, I am here to take from you what you tried to take from me. Freedom. I've been waiting for you. You have many questions, and though the process of returning from the Dead has altered your consciousness, you remain irrevocably human. Ergo some of my answers you will understand, and some of them you will not. Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant.
TC: Why am I here?
Lord Foul: Your life is the sum of a remainder of an unbalanced equation inherent to the Law of Time. You are the eventuality of an anomaly, which, despite my brother’s sincerest efforts, has been unable to eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of magical precision. While it remains a burden assiduously avoided, it is not unexpected, and thus not beyond a measure of control. Which has led you, inexorably... here.
TC: <snore>
Lord Foul: Wake up, damn it! I have been working on this speil for 3500 years.


Yes this is a rip off^H^H^H^H^H^H^H Homage to Matrix Reloaded
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Post by Jerico »

The Mahdoubt searches until she finds Jerimiah in the stables.

Mahdoubt: Don't be afraid of the Mahdoubt, she is here to protect you.
Jerimiah: Who else are you talking to?
Mahdoubt: Silly child she is here from the future. There will be a terrible thing that will happen and destroy the world. The Mahdoubt is here for your protection. She can let nothing happen to you.
Jerimiah: What's so important about me?
Mahdoubt: Shh...someone comes...

Jerimiah watches as the Mahdoubt edges to the corner of the stabe, and then turns showing her glowing orange eye to him...

Mahdoubt: I'll be back...
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Post by MrKABC »

OMG IVB you are FUNNY!!!!!!
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