Bad Writing Game--Win Some GOLD!

[Savor Dam]

Here is something I posted in a Win Wayfriend's Money game back in 2012. The challenge was to craft a limerick that brought Quagmire, a character from the TV cartoon Family Guy into the story of the Mission to the Giants in The Illearth War:

• There once was a horn-dog, Quagmire
  Who did to a Lordship aspire
  But desire to mate
  Led this darn reprobate
  In haste to bedchambers retire
  
  When the Lords rode off east to their quest
  (And in time had to face dreaded skest)
  He ignored his orders
  And went to his quarters
  Where desires were never repressed
  
  A conquest was once heard to say
  "Oh dear, I am wearing away
  The inside of my thighs
  Look just like mince pies
  For Quagmire won't shave every day"
  
  What fate for this lover so ardent?
  The end of his tale's quite important
  Our oversexed schnook
  Got moved to a new book
  As Master Eremis of Mordant

[deer of the dawn]

About as indecent as you can get and not so raunchy as to offend. Nicely played, Savor Dam.

[Skyweir]

Well that was indeed a limerick

Pretty much the worst one so far

Nasty imagery and no mistake

[Shuram Gudatetris]

There once was a man from Omaha
Who drove to work in his car.
He was running late
But make no mistake
It's not his fault if traffic slows to a crawl.

[bossfootbaleur]

It's Like my wife said "I was going to buy carte itunes maroc and enter a second one, but nobody else was playing..."

[Edited For Spam]

[Dread Poet Jethro]

Skyweir, be forewarned
Now, more than a year later
Your game has gone stale

[Avatar]

Spam removed.

--A

[Skyweir]

Ok new writing comp ... mmm ... a bad sci fi in 100 words or less. C

[samrw3]

Bill was quickly reviewing the TARGET screen. There Amy was at another shopping mall. Bill had told her not to shop. There had to be consequences. Bill changed the screen to specs screen and fooled the tracking into thinking that Amy had higher level of RFID chip. Bill amped the RFID chip within Amy. Bill waited for the screen to show elimination of target. However, the chip just seemed to disappear from the screen. Bill checked all diagnostics but nothing,,,

Meanwhile in a nearby shopping mall..screams are heard as a giant cyborg woman grabs shoes and purses out of stores....

[sgt.null]

Ok new writing comp ... mmm ...
a bad sci fi in 100 words or less. C

Once upon a time

there was a space butterfly.

It flew away.

The end.

[DoctorGamgee]

"It became increasingly obvious to the Avian Overlords circling the third rock from Sol, that they had made a huge mistake aiming the croquet ball from the Zebulon Galaxy to careen into this proto-planet. The Giant, Flying Raptors refused to leave the atmosphere. The Dactyls of Terra had bashful bladders, and were unaware that 'In space, no one can hear your pee...'

--From Professor Pneumonia Kneeson's "Etymological Wreasoning Pfor Psylent Consonandts Within the English Language, Eighth Edition, P. Atey Ate."

[sgt.null]

have I won yet?

[deer of the dawn]

Sidhe Boy Gun writhed her way out of the crashed space pod, her green sequined bodysuit tearing between her three ample breasts revealing her gilled cleavage glistening with perspiration. But it didn't smell like sweat, it smelled like rocket fuel. She noticed a glug, glug noise as she lit a cigarette. BOOM.

[Cord Hurn]

Is it possible my friends?
To have still chosen no winner?
Has the criteria been lost?
Has the plot gotten thinner?

[sgt.null]

In 2026, a wormhole portal, the Ark, to an ancient city on Mars is discovered deep below the Nevada desert. Twenty years later, the 85 personnel at the Union Aerospace Corporation (UAC) research facility on Mars are attacked by an unknown assailant. Following a distress call sent by Dr. Carmack, a squad of eight marines are sent to the research facility. The team includes squad leader Sgt. Asher "Sarge" Mahonin, "Duke", "Goat", "Destroyer", Portman, "Mac", a rookie ("Kid") and John "Reaper" Grimm. They are sent on a search-and-destroy mission to Mars, with UAC only concerned with the retrieval of computer data from their anthropology, archeology, and genetics experiments.

The team uses the Ark to reach Mars, ordering the Earth site on lockdown. Arriving on Mars, they are met by UAC employee "Pinky". Reaper finds his twin sister, Dr. Sam Grimm, and escorts her to retrieve the data. He learns that a dig site, where their parents were accidentally killed years earlier, was reopened and ancient skeletons of a humanoid race genetically enhanced with an artificial 24th chromosome pair were discovered.

While searching for survivors in the facility, the marines find a traumatized and injured Dr. Carmack and escort him to the medical lab for treatment, but he later disappears. The marines shoot at an unknown creature in the genetics lab that leads them down into the facility's sewer, where it attacks and kills Goat. They kill the creature and take it to the medical lab, where Sam performs an autopsy and discovers that its organs are human. She and Duke witness Goat resurrecting and killing himself by smashing his head against a reinforced window. The two are attacked by a creature, trap it, and soon deduce that it is a mutated Dr. Carmack.

The squad methodically tracks down and destroys several of the creatures, though Mac, Destroyer, and Portman die in the process. An angered Sarge kills the mutated Dr. Carmack. Sam, Reaper, and Sarge learn that UAC was experimenting on humans using the extra Martian Chromosome (C24) harvested from the remains of the ancient skeletons, but the mutants got loose, leading to the outbreak. Sam and Reaper try to convince Sarge that the creatures are humans from the facility, mutated by the C24 serum and that not all of those infected will fully transform into the creatures. Sam hypothesizes that some of those injected with C24 will develop superhuman abilities but retain their humanity, while others with a predisposition for violent or psychotic behavior will become creatures, a pattern she believes also happened with the Martians, who built the Ark to escape.

Some creatures use the Ark to reach Earth, where they slaughter or mutate the research staff. The marines, Sam, and Pinky follow, and Sarge orders the squad to sanitize the entire facility. When Kid informs Sarge that he found, but refuses to kill, a group of survivors, Sarge executes Kid for insubordination, leading to a standoff with an armed Pinky. The group is suddenly attacked by creatures who kill Duke and drag Sarge and Pinky away. Reaper is wounded by a ricocheting bullet. To prevent him from bleeding to death, Sam injects her brother with the C24 serum, despite his concern that his violent past predisposes him to transform into a creature.

Reaper regains consciousness and finds his wounds have healed and that Sam has gone missing. Using his new C24 superhuman abilities, he fights his way through the facility, even battling a mutated and monstrous Pinky before finding an unconscious Sam with Sarge, who has become infected and has murdered the group of survivors Kid had previously found. Reaper and Sarge battle, both of them enhanced with superhuman powers. Reaper is able to gain the upper hand and throws Sarge through the Ark back to Mars along with a grenade, which destroys Sarge and the Mars facility. Reaper then carries his unconscious sister into the elevator and rides back up to the ground level in Nevada.

[Cord Hurn]

^Somebody give this man a bagful of white gold dollars before some other website steals him away from us!

[sgt.null]

I left my heart in s jar by the door.

[Cord Hurn]

I'll give my tokens, maybe, but am still hoarding all those white gold dollars, thank you very much.

[sgt.null]

toking like the dew drop man who let it fly in a garbage can