The Best Bulls**t Jobs

[wayfriend]

Readers' 20 best bulls**t jobs

Stanleybing.com readers sent in hundreds of bulls**t jobs. We've picked 20 favorites - jobs that are the most satisfying, lucrative and least useful. Here, in readers' own words, are the best bulls**t jobs.

Communication Manager ... Sofware Quality Assurance Analyst ... Professional Clairvoyant ...

Do you have a great Bulls**t job? That is, a job that you don't have to work very hard to get paid? (I wish I did.)

[Zarathustra]

Yeah, I've got a bullshit job. I sell roofs to people who need them. I'm a "storm chaser." It's a derogatory term, and people inherently distrust us because we come from out of state to *gasp* make a profit from people's suffering. But they wouldn't get their roofs repaired without us.

It's really easy. I climb on top of roofs. I measure them. (Tape measure, 8th grade math . . . BAM! I've measured their roof). Then I convince them to like me and trust me by chatting (can you believe people actually like me? ). They buy a roof from me. I make $500-$2000, depending on the size of the roof. Not bad for 30 minutes of work.

Of course, there is dealing with the insurance companies, dealing with suppliers, dealing with the roof installers, dealing with the production department, correcting anything that goes wrong. But for the amount of money I make, it's ridiculously easy. I had only 3 days training before I was selling roofs. I've NEVER had job where I could go three days out of training and make $3500+ a week. Unbelievable. I'm not bragging--I was literally in disbelief when I worked Katrina. I couldn't believe money could come this easily.

Of course, I have to leave my family periodically for months at a time. But that also means I get to sit at home a lot and work on my book while waiting for the next storm. But when I work, I work 7 days a week from sun up to sun down. But that's completely up to me. I don't have a boss looking over my shoulder and telling me when I have to work. I'm completely on my own. The harder I work, the more I make. When I was conducting business on my cell phone, wandering through the mall shopping for Christmas presents, THAT'S when I realized I had a bullsh*t job.

A single man willing to travel and be self-motivated can make $150,000 a year. I have a friend doing this who complained about his lowest year being $65,000. That's what he called a "bad year" for a single man in his 30s. And he was chuckling that his accountant was able to show he had a loss for that year. (Still opposed to the Fair Tax, everyone???).

[Avatar]

*shrug* Yeah, I guess my job is largely a Bulls**t one. I edit and write copy / content for a tourism marketing company. Press releases, web-pages, that sort of thing. I mean, it needs to be done, but its not exactly difficult for anybody who can manage to write a comprehensible sentence. (Not, it seems, that many can, present company excluded of course.)

Easy, low-pressure work. Pay isn't exceptional, but I live comfortably enough and have lots of free time at work which I spend...well, writing here of course.

--A

[wayfriend]

I was wondering what kind of job a guy with 20,000 posts could have.

[DukkhaWaynhim]

Well, when you come down to it, everyone that isn't a farmer, firefighter, ER doctor, clergy, or teacher must have a bullsh*t job, if you take that term to mean anything nonessential. And even those are negotiable.

Me - I create, edit, manage, and showcase large volumes of documentation (cabinets-full) to demonstrate that the computer systems and applications at my company do what they say they do, so our customer's clinical trial data can pass FDA inspections. I don't make the drugs, I don't make the clinical data, I don't even make the systems that hold the data on the drugs. I make documents - and sometimes I don't even do that; I just criticize others' documents...

dw

[wayfriend]

IMO If it's hard work, or if you don't get paid what you deserve, it ain't a BS job. A BS job is getting paid well for not doing much.

[matrixman]

Good website, Wayfriend! Thanks. Those are some awesome BS jobs listed. Am I jealous? You bet.

I took the amusing quiz on the site and got a bulls**t factor of "only" 8 out of 40 for my job. A lot of the stuff doesn't apply to me: I don't have an office, I don't take "business trips," etc.

I set up meeting rooms and audio/video equipment. I do routine maintenance around the place. I cover the front desk switchboard as needed.

Some days it's hectic and I'm really running around, other days I can get away with doing next to nothing. If only I could get a "real" bulls**t position in the company where I could eliminate the "running around" part, sigh...

[dANdeLION]

My job rated a 31/40 on the bulls*** scale, which proves it's really about how you do your job, not the job itself that's the main factor. Or, it could be I'm recovering from the flu and it's a slow day......

[Holsety]

I mean, it needs to be done, but its not exactly difficult for anybody who can manage to write a comprehensible sentence. (Not, it seems, that many can, present company excluded of course.)

Me am are speak american goodester then your if on:

I was wondering what kind of job a guy with 20,000 posts could have.

Forum Moderator.

Nah that's not true, Av is more than quantity

I have three job type things. One is student...that means thinking sometimes, BS other times. Less BS in the harder classes, but I'm sure everyone's dealt with some busywork in HS. Not that it's all irrelevant, but some of it is.

I'm a cashier at a soup and sandwich place, there's not too much thinking going on, I just have to stay awake. That's a fairly BS job.

I do a few hours of assistant teaching at my temple on the weekends (don't tell them I don't consider myself jewish, k ). Just volunteer work, but it's really fun. Well, the second session with 4th and 5th graders is somewhat crappy, normally they're smart/interesting enough by that age but for some reason this year they're really boring. The first graders are an amazing bunch though, a bunch of really energetic and interested kids.

[Marv]

If I ever have a 'bs' job you can kill me. Don't want one, don't need one. I'd rather earn little money doing an honest days work than sitting around pretending to work until 6 when I can go home.

[Avatar]

I'd rather earn little money doing an honest days work than sitting around pretending to work until 6 when I can go home.

Yes, but you get paid for sitting around pretending to work. I just have to figure out how to eliminate the having to come in and pretend I'm working part, and I'll be the happiest man on earth.

(I do work of course...sometimes...when I really really have to...and I'm glad to say that my work has never suffered because of my posting, and I've never missed a deadline. But when your work is writing, and you're often writing more than one thing at once, a little bit of writing on the side is pretty un-noticeable. )

--A