Kevin's Watch

Posted: **Sun Jul 30, 2017 10:14 pm**

Have you any idea how disturbing it is for someone to not understand fractions?

Posted: **Sun Jul 30, 2017 10:22 pm**

If you were the last person on Earth, I'd download a Martian dating app.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 11:45 am**

Just because you were in the same room doesn't mean I asked you out. You just happened to be standing behind her. Way behind her. At least ten feet. Why am I talking to you?

Posted: **Fri Aug 04, 2017 2:36 am**

Kinda rather be anywhere else, doing anything else, with anyone else. Nothing personal.

Posted: **Fri Aug 04, 2017 10:56 am**

Listen to the words coming out of my mouth, I never asked you out on a date, I have never seen you before in my life, I don't know why you are loose on the street.

Posted: **Sat Aug 05, 2017 7:44 am**

Manny gave me the c4 to deliver to Mr. Glass.

Posted: **Mon Aug 07, 2017 7:10 pm**

No offense but do I know you?

Posted: **Thu Aug 10, 2017 2:30 am**

Oops, I was just having a bad day when I asked you. I'm not really ready to settle so low quite yet.

Posted: **Thu Aug 10, 2017 11:16 am**

Please don't take this the wrong way but should you be kissing that guy right in front of me while we're discussing out dinner plans? You know what? I think you'll be just fine without me.

Posted: **Tue Aug 15, 2017 10:29 pm**

Questing for the perfect date. You're not even in the top ten.

Posted: **Tue Aug 15, 2017 10:36 pm**

Regarding the aforementioned date, I must respectfully decline as I have recently discovered that you escaped from an asylum.

Posted: **Mon Sep 18, 2017 1:31 am**

Seriously considered it in a moment of desperation, but thankfully that moment has passed.

Posted: **Mon Sep 18, 2017 11:18 am**

There was a time in my life when I thought going out with you was a good idea however I have grown, as a person, since then and I believe the experience of spending time with you would undo the progress I have made.

Posted: **Tue Sep 19, 2017 11:45 pm**

Ugly bitches aren't my bag.

Posted: **Wed Sep 20, 2017 11:02 am**

Victor Von Doom threatened me and said if I went on a date with you he would, and I quote, "crush you like the doggerel rodent you are!". So Susan Storm, no date for you.

Posted: **Fri Sep 29, 2017 3:10 pm**

xenophobia got the better of me.

Posted: **Thu Nov 30, 2017 5:30 pm**

Yesterday it seemed like a good idea. Today I'm sober

Posted: **Sat Dec 16, 2017 6:48 am**

Zodiac warnings of zealot Zombie apocalypse caution me not to leave the house tonight

Posted: **Wed Dec 27, 2017 5:37 pm**

All I can say is that one of my other personalities must have asked you out. They do that sometimes. Sorry about that.

Posted: **Fri Dec 29, 2017 1:47 pm**

Because youre not my type Im benching you

Kevin's Watch

ABC Why I Have To Break Our Date