Embarassing Moments

[The Laughing Man]

I hereby decree forthwith that a SHART shall now be a PHART.

[drew]

At the World Cup in France (Soccer - 1998), I'd been drinking , heavily , for 3 weeks, and had arranged to meet a young lady (now my wife) I had met on my first day in Paris.
She was working during the day, so I thought I'd do a little window shopping to pass the time, so I pop into Galleries lafayette, which is one of the more prestigious shopping centres in Paris.
Of course I'm wearing a kilt (no underwear), and as I'm wandering through the shopping centre, I feel an irresistable urge to fart. (remember, I'd been drinking for 3 weeks solid) However, when I let one rip, it's not methane that's released, and as I look down, there is a small steaming runny turd on the floor. Luckily, none of it hits me or my kilt, and I walk off into the distance and find the nearest toilet to ensure there's no residue clinging on (if you know what I mean).
That in itself wasn't that embarrasing, as no one saw what happened (I hope), but when my wife found out about it a few years later,that was embarasing, and when she told her parents about it that was even more embarassing.

On the slim chance that the cleaner who cleaned that up is reading this, please accept my unreserved apology.

i'm embaraced just to read that post.

[Warmark]

At the World Cup in France (Soccer - 1998), I'd been drinking , heavily , for 3 weeks, and had arranged to meet a young lady (now my wife) I had met on my first day in Paris.
She was working during the day, so I thought I'd do a little window shopping to pass the time, so I pop into Galleries lafayette, which is one of the more prestigious shopping centres in Paris.
Of course I'm wearing a kilt (no underwear), and as I'm wandering through the shopping centre, I feel an irresistable urge to fart. (remember, I'd been drinking for 3 weeks solid) However, when I let one rip, it's not methane that's released, and as I look down, there is a small steaming runny turd on the floor. Luckily, none of it hits me or my kilt, and I walk off into the distance and find the nearest toilet to ensure there's no residue clinging on (if you know what I mean).
That in itself wasn't that embarrasing, as no one saw what happened (I hope), but when my wife found out about it a few years later,that was embarasing, and when she told her parents about it that was even more embarassing.

On the slim chance that the cleaner who cleaned that up is reading this, please accept my unreserved apology.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

[sgt.null]

oh man, that is too funny!

[Lorelei]

At the World Cup in France (Soccer - 1998), I'd been drinking , heavily , for 3 weeks, and had arranged to meet a young lady (now my wife) I had met on my first day in Paris.
She was working during the day, so I thought I'd do a little window shopping to pass the time, so I pop into Galleries lafayette, which is one of the more prestigious shopping centres in Paris.
Of course I'm wearing a kilt (no underwear), and as I'm wandering through the shopping centre, I feel an irresistable urge to fart. (remember, I'd been drinking for 3 weeks solid) However, when I let one rip, it's not methane that's released, and as I look down, there is a small steaming runny turd on the floor. Luckily, none of it hits me or my kilt, and I walk off into the distance and find the nearest toilet to ensure there's no residue clinging on (if you know what I mean).
That in itself wasn't that embarrasing, as no one saw what happened (I hope), but when my wife found out about it a few years later,that was embarasing, and when she told her parents about it that was even more embarassing.

On the slim chance that the cleaner who cleaned that up is reading this, please accept my unreserved apology.

I just read this....spit coke on my monitor and fell on the floor....thanks for making my day.

[Lorelei]

Sorry for the double post...but I just remembered a story.

Several years ago before we started dating, I met my current boyfriend in a local dive hanging out with his friends. He got up to sing a song and several girls at the table went up with him - all were quite liquored up. One of the girls decides she's gonna pants him while he's singing, so there he is singing in his underwear with his pants around his ankles. The other girl, who apparently was really, really drunk....thought he was wearing shorts and pulled his underwear down. The host then proceeded to sing "My Ding-a-ling".

[balon!]

Most of the time I get so involved in my books, that i off handedly answer people when they talk to me. This got me in major trouble at school once, when I was reading in class my teacher asked me to answer a question and I off-handedly answered "No, Im planning on going to the flicks today" or some such random thought that crossed the wasteland of my mind. Man was she pissed.

[DukkhaWaynhim]

A few years ago in the middle of a very cold winter, I was in Boston at a business meeting. I was getting into the backseat of a car at the front door of a very nice hotel with a bunch of workmates to head off to dinner, when I heard a little 'pop!' as I sat down. I didn't really think about it until I felt a sudden chill in my crotch. The crotch-seam of my pants had split rather dramatically. I had to have them stop the car and let me run back up to my room to change pants, hearing lots of laughter behind me as I left the car.

The rest of the evening the guys (from India) kept wondering if I was still cold and cracking jokes about 'preserving future generations'.

DW

[aTOMiC]

I once barfed all over my Science Teacher's desk in Middle School.

[Cord Hurn]

As a clumsy kid, I spilled liquids on the dinner table way too many times.

[sgt.null]

Did you know that stories
about awkward moments
make people more creative?
This fact was discovered by
researchers from the Kellogg
School of Management.

As the authors of the study
explain, voicing embarrassing
situations, a person removes
the barrier of self-censorship
and is ready for non-standard
solutions. That is why high
school teachers often give the
assignment to write an
embarrassing moment essay
to their students.

[Cord Hurn]

That time aged 10 or so when I drank hot chocolate in my mouth n=as a kid at Wendy's hamburger restaurant not realizing how HOT it is served and spewed it over a table.

[sgt.null]

I heard someone let off an atomic fart in Church. werent me tho.

[samrw3]

Once when i was a teenager and parents bought me mont blanc pen I thought I lost it. Abesent headed I picked it up without realizing it at the same time my Mom came in room. I took that moment to shake the pen in the air and say do you know where my pen is? I will never forget the look my Mom gave me

[sgt.null]

06/04 Got a letter from the library today. Says I need to return the book and pay a fine, or risk losing my library card. The book is titled The Schoolmen of New Hampshire.

Dream # 17 : The metallic, orange rays of dawn creep through the smoldering darkness; burning away the sodium haze. My personal gravity shifts, sways and I am lifted into the grey rust of sky. Flying along the edge of day, I pass floating animals and distant color. Speeding along the dull borders of time as dusty dogs bark warnings, silent and vague. Phasing in and out of form, drifting towards the magnetic pull of life. As the light fades to a sharp shadow. I rain upon the cold, hard earth with the trudging of my heartbeat echoing in the chloroform dusk.