Fortunately,.... Unfortunately

Post by **Lazy Luke** » Mon Jul 08, 2019 5:19 am

Unfortunately their relationshp takes a drastic downturn and you see them on Jerry Springer.
Your now on high doses of clondine for the sheer emabarressment.

Post by **Skyweir** » Mon Jul 08, 2019 11:09 am

Fortunately the clondine kills of your colonal ego and gets rid of that nasty problem thats making YOU look bad

Post by **samrw3** » Wed Jul 10, 2019 5:29 pm

Unfortunately Springer's bodyguards want you to look bad for TV ratings and show doctored video of you cheating on your spouse

Fri Jul 12, 2019 2:49 am

Fortunately, the 150 lbs of impacted sausage meat has turned zombie and materialises again, firmly embedded in your sadly overworked colon. This is fortunate because it protects the rest of your vital organs from the worst effects of the horrific violence your enraged spouse inflicts on you.

(Sorry Sky, I had to bring the monster you created back for a sequel. I ony just caught up with the thread!)

Post by **Skyweir** » Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:10 pm

Ouchy

Unfortunately you have an enraged spouse inflicting the truly worst conceivable violent violation of your colon imaginable

Fri Jul 12, 2019 6:11 pm

Skyweir wrote:Ouchy

Unfortunately you have an enraged spouse inflicting the truly worst conceivable violent violation of your colon imaginable

Oh my God, what a horrible horrible thought lol. The imagery in this thread is definitely the most vivid anywhere on the forum...

Fortunately you wake up and realise the whole colon thing with the sausage meat and the violence was all just a dream!

Post by **samrw3** » Fri Jul 12, 2019 8:59 pm

Unfortunately...your ex spouse is worst nightmare than impacted colon ...where is the Matrix when you need it?

Post by **Skyweir** » Sun Jul 14, 2019 1:22 am

Fortunately nightmares only occur in your sleep so you are safe from your ex

so long as you can stay awake.

Sun Jul 14, 2019 2:33 am

Unfortunately you are absolutely knackered from the exhausting ordeal you have recently endured. You immediately fall into a deep sleep from which it will be impossible to wake for some time.

Post by **Skyweir** » Mon Jul 15, 2019 8:52 am

Fortunately for some inexplicable reason you dream sweet dreams and are not plagued by nasty nightmares of your ex.

Website · Post by **Khaliban** » Tue Jul 16, 2019 3:37 am

Unfortunately, failure to respond to severe colon damage indicates a profound vegetative state.

Post by **Skyweir** » Tue Jul 16, 2019 5:12 am

Fortunately you are highly responsive to profound veggies and are much healthier for it

Post by **samrw3** » Tue Jul 16, 2019 3:04 pm

Unfortunately your good health has made you too annoying to party with.

Website · Post by **Khaliban** » Wed Jul 17, 2019 5:57 am

Fortunately, you don't need those sick losers.

Fri Jul 19, 2019 3:07 am

Unfortunately they need you and before you know it there are more of them than ever. They begin following you and refuse to form orderly queues

Post by **Skyweir** » Mon Jul 22, 2019 2:06 pm

Fortunately by purely good luck .. you are freed of those losers as their refusal to form orderly queues gets them all killed in an egregiously horrific road traffic accident

Tue Jul 23, 2019 4:56 am

Unfortunately the egregiously bad traffic accident triggers flashbacks to your time in 'Nam (that's ''Nam' as in Dagenham, East London, UK), causing you to inadvertantly slaughter many European tourists in a Starbucks before you return to your senses.

You fall to your knees and and scream "Oh Lord what have I done?" once again before whiling away yet another evening staring silently at the blood on your hands.

Post by **Skyweir** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 7:47 am

Oh dear g.o.d

FORTUNATELY

It was just a dream sequence.. you never killed any European Tourists ever

gotta love dream sequences.. am I right?

... so now relieved that you dont have any blood on your hands .. you go make breakfast.

Post by **Cheval** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 7:53 pm

Unfortunately, you never get to enjoy you breakfast because Thanos snapped his fingers and you turned to ashes like 1/2 of all living thi...

Post by **samrw3** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 8:11 pm

Fortunately you had accidently stepped on Ant-Man during the snap and the Avengers during rescue him also rescue you.

Kevin's Watch

Kevin's Watch

Fortunately,.... Unfortunately