Kevin's Watch

Posted: **Mon Mar 11, 2019 2:45 am**

Good news: Even dehydrated shawarma is better than quiche.

Bad news: Now your mother has you servicing a grilled chicken wrap.

Posted: **Mon Mar 11, 2019 2:55 am**

Good news. Luckily for you its a special experience for your first time servicing a grilled chicken wrap

Bad news. You kinda got too much out of it, way more than the wrap

whos just not that into you

Posted: **Wed Mar 20, 2019 9:12 pm**

Good news a chicken wrap is not into you...ewwww

Bad news: this thread has turned into some sort of bizarre prostitution scheme

Posted: **Wed Mar 20, 2019 9:31 pm**

Good news: You can blame it all on your stunt double.

Bad news: Your stunt double knows where you live.

Posted: **Wed Mar 20, 2019 10:58 pm**

Good news .. Your stunt double doubles as a pizza delivery guy and he knows your address

Bad news .. hes pissed that you blamed him for the bizarre prostitution scheme .. and delivers you a cold half eaten pizza

Posted: **Thu Mar 21, 2019 12:01 am**

Good News: You have 2 big dogs that LOVE to eat cold, 1/2 eaten pizza.

Bad News: So do you.

Posted: **Thu Mar 21, 2019 2:22 am**

Good news .. the dogs throw you a bone

Bad news .. what has become of you? Receiving crumbs etc cast aside at your dogs table

Posted: **Thu Mar 21, 2019 4:18 am**

Good news: You're living on your own, away from your mother the pimp.

Bad news: The dogs are a couple of real bitches.

Posted: **Sat Mar 23, 2019 6:58 am**

Good news. The bitches take an unnatural liking to you

Bad news. Your just not that into them

Posted: **Sun Mar 24, 2019 9:59 pm**

Good news: Your recent, um, life experiences have led to you being invited to appear on a talk show.

Bad news: They also invited your mum.

Posted: **Sun Mar 24, 2019 11:59 pm**

Good news: The audience takes your side.

Bad news: Your mum starts pimping you to <i>this</i> audience.

Posted: **Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:03 am**

Good news: The audience has NO interest in you being pimped-out to them.

Bad news: You haven't met the backstage crew yet.

Posted: **Tue Mar 26, 2019 7:18 am**

Good news. Everybody shuts your mums inappropriate behaviour down. NO MORE PIMPING OUT anyone ever again

Bad news. Your mum disowns you

Posted: **Wed Mar 27, 2019 12:04 am**

Good news: You've been disowned by an abusive pimp.

Bad news: Now you have to pimp yourself out.

Posted: **Wed Mar 27, 2019 8:10 am**

Good news. You realise you dont need to pimp yourself out to get on in life

Bad news. You just dont know HOW to get on in life

Posted: **Mon Apr 22, 2019 8:55 am**

Good news: You may not know how to get on in life, but you enjoy learning as you go.

Bad news: While you learn as you go, you get conned into paying too much for all your lessons.

Posted: **Mon Apr 22, 2019 11:31 pm**

Good news. A friendly badger

you meet has quite a fortune squirrelled away and gladly lends you the money you need to pay for the lessons you learned

Bad news. There is nothing more for you to learn

Posted: **Thu Apr 25, 2019 2:24 pm**

Good news: You have learned that there is nothing left for you to learn

Bad news: you are stuck in endless loop of learning that you are learning there is nothing left for you to learn

Posted: **Thu Apr 25, 2019 5:35 pm**

Good news : locked in an endless time loop, you are immune to Armageddon.

Bad news: the post-Armageddon world is a dark and lonely place.

Posted: **Fri Apr 26, 2019 12:23 am**

Good news: Seven weirdos with an umbrella show up and drag you out of the loop.

Bad news: The gorilla guy is looking at you funny.

Kevin's Watch

Good news, Bad news