Kevin's Watch

Posted: **Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:39 pm**

I don't care about the WGDs. I liked the contests.

Posted: **Wed Sep 23, 2009 11:52 pm**

Auleliel wrote:I don't care about the WGDs. I liked the contests.

Ditto.

And anyway, I'm not a stranger to humiliation...

Posted: **Thu Sep 24, 2009 12:36 am**

...white gold ring...white gold ring...white gold ring...

Posted: **Mon Oct 05, 2009 2:38 pm**

Today begins season two of Win Wayfriend's Money. (Check the date why don't you.) Hopefully, this season will be as exciting as the last.

Every once in a while, I'm going to give away 500 WGDs to the person who wins my contest. The contest will be different each time. And I can only do it when I have 500 WGDs, obviously.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

This Week's Contest

The season premiere of Win Wayfriend's Money will have a quadrupal 2000 WGD prize. But you will have to earn it. This week's contest will be to write a sonnet!

Yes, we are talking about an English (or Shakespearian) Sonnet. It is a fourteen line poem with the rhyming scheme a b a b / c d c d / e f e f / g g. And each line must be iambic pentameter: 10 syllables which go thusly: step-STEP, step-STEP, step-STEP, step-STEP, step-STEP.

Okay, okay ... just do your best, it doesn't have to be perfect iambic pentameter. But you do get brownie points for attempting it.

One last, very important rule: it must be a sonnet to Linden Avery.

The winner will be picked a week from this Friday. The judging will be based on form, wit, humor, and the consulted opinions of Shakespeare, Spenser, and Bacon. And it will be greatly influenced by the audience's response -- so audience, please let us know what you think!

Posted: **Mon Oct 05, 2009 5:54 pm**

wayfriend wrote:One last, very important rule: it must be a sonnet to Linden Avery.

About half the Watch just lost interest in submitting....

Posted: **Mon Oct 05, 2009 6:13 pm**

I have written many sonnets. But to Linden? I'm not sure I can pull that one off

Posted: **Mon Oct 05, 2009 7:00 pm**

I'm learning all about writing sonnets of hate.

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 12:29 am**

High Lord Tolkien wrote:I'm learning all about writing sonnets of hate.

If this is allowed, I'm all for it!

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 12:45 am**

This could take me a while (-he calmly types, even as cold panic seizes him).

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 12:49 am**

I have my first 4 lines finished! Now for the next ten...

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 1:46 am**

Sheesh! Iambically challenged I am. Oh well, I'll get started tomorrow.

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 1:56 am**

I finished my first attempt! Although, it's more of a sonnet about Linden Avery rather than to her.

Sonnet About Linden Avery

O Chosen, Sunsage, One whom I abhor,
Although by many you are much admired,
And then, by others, you are deemed a whore,
You are to me one who is ne'er desired.
As rumor has it, you will save the Land
From Despite and from sundry evil things,
But I can't help it--I just cannot stand
The fact that you took T.C.'s white gold ring.
Not only that, but also this I find
Intolerable--how it makes me quake--
When Elohim took over T.C.'s mind
A great protagonist you did not make.
In hate, I used to wish that you were dead,
And that, of you, I never would have read.

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 2:03 am**

Wow... that's going to prove to be tough to compete against...

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 2:13 am**

Orlion wrote:Wow... that's going to prove to be tough to compete against...

Why, thank you.

Poetry usually isn't my strong suit.

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 2:13 am**

Nice work, Owlie!

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 3:15 am**

Orlion wrote:Wow... that's going to prove to be tough to compete against...

Yeah......damn, that was awesome.
Mine is going to stink but i'm still doing it.

Posted: **Wed Oct 07, 2009 1:48 am**

High Lord Tolkien wrote:Mine is going to stink but i'm still doing it.

Same, and ... same!
OK, here it is (I swear I'll never use thou, thy or thee in a sentence ever again!)

O Linden, dear, so true thy nature be
Though doubt and fear can paralyse thy thought
Thy drive and passion thwart adversity
And triumph through another battle fought

Though THOOLAH aim their grubby slurs at thee
And mock thou when thy whining hits its peak
And criticise thou as a travesty
Thou'll surely find the victory thou seeks

And though I understand thy need for Tom
The saviour of the Land is truly you
He whines and moans and rapes and bargains on...
And not as hot and not as human too

If 'Hue of Bone' or 'Blackhawk' render thee
Those THOOLAH fools will quail on bended knee

Posted: **Wed Oct 07, 2009 3:09 am**

Excellent, Stevie!
But...erm...
...you need one more stanza...

Posted: **Wed Oct 07, 2009 4:56 am**

Ugh, I'm out of ideas! Added another in the original post...

Posted: **Wed Oct 07, 2009 10:16 am**

Auleliel wrote:I finished my first attempt! Although, it's more of a sonnet about Linden Avery rather than to her.

Sonnet About Linden Avery

O Chosen, Sunsage, One whom I abhor,
Although by many you are much admired,
And then, by others, you are deemed a whore,
You are to me one who is ne'er desired.
As rumor has it, you will save the Land
From Despite and from sundry evil things,
But I can't help it--I just cannot stand
The fact that you took T.C.'s white gold ring.
Not only that, but also this I find
Intolerable--how it makes me quake--
When Elohim took over T.C.'s mind
A great protagonist you did not make.
In hate, I used to wish that you were dead,
And that, of you, I never would have read.

That is great!