Kevin's Watch

Great Balls of Fire!
You can bend space and time.
Unfortunately, once you do, much like a paperclip, space and time are no longer useful for what they were designed for. Everything that ever was, including yourself, is left floating in no where contemplating their wrists and debating whether the All-Ticking Clock exits.

I wish all threads that crack me were posted in daily.

I wish all threads that crack me were posted in daily.

ka-chuggle > there are hilarious threads, people all over the web come to see - crashing this site forever.

i wish - i wish i were a fish

Glub-glub
You are now a fish and live happily in a fishbowl that is owned by an 8 year-old.
Until the 8 year old takes you out for a walk with his pet kitty!

My wish is to have more friends.

My wish is to have more friends.

welcome to the son's of the fourth reich monthly meeting...

i wish i had musical talent

You do have musical talent.
Too bad it's only with a kazoo.

I wish I could prove there are ghosts.

alla-ka-blooey : to prove you are a ghost you become one.

sorry.

wish i had amillion dollars.

BAM!

You wake up to find a million dollars in your bank account.
IRS wants to know where it came from too.

I wish that I could slow down time.

ka-farto! you slow down time, buthave no idea how to restart it. it will now take you 1000 yrs to live out the next fifty of your life.

i wish they were all happy in the lebanon

sgt.null wrote:ka-farto! you slow down time, buthave no idea how to restart it. it will now take you 1000 yrs to live out the next fifty of your life.

i wish they were all happy in the lebanon

Ker-plunka-ker-pling!
All 303 residents on Lebanon Kansas had a birthday party for Aunt Josephine. There was much eating, dancing and rejoicing.




I wish Mars and Venus were able to sustain life as we know it on Earth.

High Lord Tolkien wrote: I wish Mars and Venus were able to sustain life as we know it on Earth.

Ba-da-boom, ba-da-bing
Mars and Venus are able to sustain life as we know it on Earth, they just aren't willing to, Earth is placed in permanent quarantine.

I wish wishes were horses.

*Whinny*

Wishes become horses and since there are so many wishes by everyone,
a stampede is caused and everyone is trampled beneath the thousands of hooves.

(Score one for being a Cheval!)


I wish there were something worth watching on the telly.

Cheval wrote: I wish there were something worth watching on the telly.

*static*static*Picture*

There is something worth watching on the telly. Everyone on earth moves to the U.K. cuz it's the only place they have "telly." The island sinks beneath the weight, everyone drowns. Sharks become enormous, and wipe out the dolphins.

I wish I was always right about everything.

Za bling!

You're always right about everything. Everyone hates you, you have no friends because everyone thinks you're a smug prick, and you die a lonely man.

I wish I was 20 again, and knew what I know now.

StevieG wrote:I wish I was 20 again, and knew what I know now.

*Poof*
You are 20 again, and know what you know now. Unfortunately, you are not yet emotionally mature enough to handle this extra knowledge, and you waste away in despair.

I wish it were easy to catch up with everything I've missed from being away from KW for so long.

Auleliel wrote:

StevieG wrote:I wish I was 20 again, and knew what I know now.

*Poof*
You are 20 again, and know what you know now. Unfortunately, you are not yet emotionally mature enough to handle this extra knowledge, and you waste away in despair.

I wish it were easy to catch up with everything I've missed from being away from KW for so long.

*Zing!*

Its easy for you to catch up on what you've missed at KW, but sadly you stumble upon many AATE spoilers and have the experience you've been waiting on for three years ruined for you.

I wish my hair would grow back naturally.

rdhopeca wrote:I wish my hair would grow back naturally.

Abracadabra!
Your hair grows back naturally. In fact, it grows to be 8 feet long overnight. You get a haircut to trim it to your favorite length, but it continues to grow at a rate of 1 foot per hour. You now must accompany every meal with a haircut, or else spend each day tripping over your own lustrous locks. You wake up each morning surrounded by a giant hairball, and you must shave your head before your morning commute so you can see any obstacles during rush hour traffic. A new brand of hair care products has been created in your name, and thousands of bald people now sport wigs made from your discarded hair. You are contemplating creating a line of clothing and textile products made from your hair as a way to raise funds for your frequent haircuts and the extra shampoo you must use to wash several feet of hair every day.

I wish I were asleep.

Actually, you really are asleep...

...inside a little "growth-pod" on some alien spaceship and everything that you thought "real" is just but an ever-ending dream.
You think you're awake right now, don't you?


I wish for this week to seem to feel like a long week.

I wish for this week to seem to feel like a long week

Badonkadonk!!!

This week for you now seems very long; unfortunatly, due to a typo at the wish headquarters, it is now a long and Weak week; therefore, whatever it was that you wanted to experience for a longer amount of time, is no more, and the week just sucks.
And its really long.
And sucky.

I wish I could make my own beer

drew wrote:I wish I could make my own beer

*Snap!* *Crackle!* *Pop!*
You can make your own beer. It's beer, and you can make it, but it tastes absolutely terrible and is later proven to poison cats, dogs, and small children, should they accidentally ingest it. The havoc it wreaks upon the liver is astronomical.

I wish I would finally get a response on that job application, even if the response is "no, we don't want you, go throw yourself off a cliff for all we care", because any response is better than no response.

I wish I would finally get a response on that job application, even if the response is "no, we don't want you, go throw yourself off a cliff for all we care", because any response is better than no response.

You finally get that response...and...you are accepted! BUT it's in a foreign country and you have to leave everything behind....oh...wait...

I wish I could play guitar like Eric Johnson.