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Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 4:19 am
by thefirst
That's lovely sgt.
Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:31 pm
by MsMary
We need more nonsense here.

Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 6:40 pm
by sgt.null
The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright--
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.
The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done--
"It's very rude of him," she said,
"To come and spoil the fun!"
The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud, because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead--
There were no birds to fly.
The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand;
They wept like anything to see
Such quantities of sand:
"If this were only cleared away,"
They said, "it would be grand!"
"If seven maids with seven mops
Swept it for half a year.
Do you suppose," the Walrus said,
"That they could get it clear?"
"I doubt it," said the Carpenter,
And shed a bitter tear.
"O Oysters, come and walk with us!"
The Walrus did beseech.
"A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk,
Along the briny beach:
We cannot do with more than four,
To give a hand to each."
The eldest Oyster looked at him,
But never a word he said:
The eldest Oyster winked his eye,
And shook his heavy head--
Meaning to say he did not choose
To leave the oyster-bed.
But four young Oysters hurried up,
All eager for the treat:
Their coats were brushed, their faces washed,
Their shoes were clean and neat--
And this was odd, because, you know,
They hadn't any feet.
Four other Oysters followed them,
And yet another four;
And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more--
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore.
The Walrus and the Carpenter
Walked on a mile or so,
And then they rested on a rock
Conveniently low:
And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row.
"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--
Of cabbages--and kings--
And why the sea is boiling hot--
And whether pigs have wings."
"But wait a bit," the Oysters cried,
"Before we have our chat;
For some of us are out of breath,
And all of us are fat!"
"No hurry!" said the Carpenter.
They thanked him much for that.
"A loaf of bread," the Walrus said,
"Is what we chiefly need:
Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed--
Now if you're ready, Oysters dear,
We can begin to feed."
"But not on us!" the Oysters cried,
Turning a little blue.
"After such kindness, that would be
A dismal thing to do!"
"The night is fine," the Walrus said.
"Do you admire the view?
"It was so kind of you to come!
And you are very nice!"
The Carpenter said nothing but
"Cut us another slice:
I wish you were not quite so deaf--
I've had to ask you twice!"
"It seems a shame," the Walrus said,
"To play them such a trick,
After we've brought them out so far,
And made them trot so quick!"
The Carpenter said nothing but
"The butter's spread too thick!"
"I weep for you," the Walrus said:
"I deeply sympathize."
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.
"O Oysters," said the Carpenter,
"You've had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?'
But answer came there none--
And this was scarcely odd, because
They'd eaten every one.
Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 8:54 pm
by MsMary
I love that.

Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 12:09 am
by sgt.null
youtube.com/watch?v=IqhlQfXUk7w
Ministry of Silly Walks
Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 12:37 am
by MsMary
That's just silly.

Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 11:02 am
by Reave the Unjust
MsMary wrote:That's just silly.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZVjKlBCvhg
htaeD ro ekaC
Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 3:37 pm
by emotional leper
Tea and Cake or Death! Tea and Cake or Death!
LITTLE RED COOKBOOK! LITTLE RED COOKBOOK!
Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 5:58 pm
by sgt.null
tEa AnD cAkE
Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 6:16 pm
by Wyldewode
I've tried to read your story a couple of times, but just can't get into it. . .

Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 6:43 pm
by sgt.null
can i save that moment? that moment when a thousand birds fell off a roof top and into the sky? that moment when the sun shone brightly down a multi-colored street and the morning seemed a bit less like morning and a bit more like heaven?
they fell, all at once, and i looked and watched as they did a dance in the sky for me as the rest of the world walked past. i watched the faces of the passing people and their mouths all turned up slightly more than usual. i smiled at a man and he smiled back, a broad smile, full of life, his eyes gleaming with excitement. i looked up at the birds and asked where they were going, but the largest of them just said "caw" before taking to the sky.
and the sky was full of life and falling faster and faster towards me and i felt i should duck but didn't and a big blanket of movement came closer and closer moved the air near my face and it was all that i could do to keep from leaping up and calling out to them.
and they rose up again and fell higher and higher until they were just spots dotting the perfect blue and i waved and a woman walked past and touched my arm and said
"sweetie, it's gone."
and i reached my arms as high as they could go and i closed my eyes and cupped my hands together and brought back down to earth the memory of the living sky.
"caw" it said, and pecked at my palm.
Posted: Fri Feb 08, 2008 4:13 am
by MsMary
One bright day in the middle of the night
Two dead boys got up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
and came to rescue the two dead boys.
If you don't believe this story is true,
Just ask the blind man, he saw it, too.
Posted: Fri Feb 08, 2008 6:08 am
by sgt.null
Posted: Fri Feb 08, 2008 8:43 am
by Edge
Words of wisdom to live by, my son (or daughter):
Never try to outwit the owl.
Never try to outrun the cheetah.
Never try to outanteat the anteater.
Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:12 am
by MsMary
I like this one:
Edge wrote:
Never try to outanteat the anteater.

Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:39 am
by emotional leper
[MOD EDIT: Please use something a bit less obscene]
Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:41 am
by JazFusion
It's been my lifelong dream that AC/DC perform the hokey pokey for me.
Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 10:32 am
by sgt.null
Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 12:59 pm
by thefirst
Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 3:28 pm
by sgt.null
JazFusion wrote:It's been my lifelong dream that AC/DC perform the hokey pokey for me.
AC?DC