How do you feel today?

[Worm of Despite]

Thanks LF, now you have me worrying if I have lesbian hair since I cut it short... thank a lot.

Nah. It's that her hair is kind of boyish-looking on her, and she has a hipster-Goth look going, so she looks like she likes to mix it up or very well could if she wanted. And I ain't lookin' for a chick that loose.

LF, I think you are just humoring me....

Nope. She really looks all hipster. Why would that be humorous? I never said you had lesbian hair--you did! Here's a pic of her, to compare.



And I also said I have no problem with lesbian hair, so's even if you do who cares?!

[JazFusion]

Too bad you guys can't see the whole shirt I am wearing... it's a replica of one of the shirts Jayne wears in Serenity. I am such an uber dork. Seriously. I think I need professional anti dorking therapy.

Dorkiness is f-ing awesome, and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. You know what happened to me at work a few weeks ago? I was told the thumbs-up sign (you know, giving someone the old 'thumbs up') was dorky. I do it ALL THE TIME!! And besides thumbing up, I am a dork through and through anyway (did you see my TC homage video with Star Trek figurines?).

FTW and let dorkiness reign supreme.

Dorkiness will forever and ever remain awesome in the ever of forever. Novelty shirts will always remain an important part of my wardrobe. Batman shirt I wear all the time? Check. Video game shirts? Check. Stylized Chewbacca head in rastafarian colors? CHECK.

I also have my nice clothes wardrobe and enjoy dressing up. But you just can't beat lounging in jeans, chucks and a dorky shirt.

[Cameraman Jenn]

I am now the proud owner of five Firefly/Serenity shirts, the latest one says:

in-ter-es-ting (in'tri-sting)
adj. 1. capable of holding one's
attention. 2. arousing a feeling
of interest. 3. oh God, oh God,
we're all going to die.

I've got several Monty Python ones of which my favorite is the one that just says "Huge Tracks of Land" in antique writing directly across the front of my breasts. I also broke down and had to get this one I have been coveting that's from another favorite film of mine, the shirt is all black and has a fake "Hello my name is" replica silkscreened on the front and then in what looks like handwriting it says, "Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die." I was wearing that in the airport on my last trip and a girl behind me in the security line was asking me where I got it because she absolutely had to have one too.

On other notes, I had an incident with a co-worker that was just not cool tonight. I had worked with these guys earlier on a laptop sale and sold a bunch of stuff to go along with it, including our protection plan and it was a significant sale. They said they had to go back to work but would be back at 8:30 to pick it all up. When they came back at 8:30, they asked for me and Gerald told me over the walkie so I went over to the laptop area to finalize the sale. Tyrone was talking to them and I walked up and said, "Hey, glad to see you guys came back for the laptop and stuff." Tyrone ignored me and kept talking to them and then I got asked by another customer where something was before I could take back my sale. I got on the walkie and said, "I set all that up Tyrone, worked with them for half an hour earlier today." No response. Zainab said, "I know you did because you told me earlier about the PPP(protection plan)." Still nothing from Tyrone. Later on after work, I said to Cheng while we were breaking down boxes in the back, "I have to admit, I feel a little out of sorts that Tyrone took credit for my PPP, mostly because it was the largest one I've sold so far." Cheng says to me, "I told him at the register that it was your sale and he told me that you should have come up and finished it. He was kinda laughing about it too." I was like, "WHAT??? I did come up because they asked for me and Gerald came and got me but Tyrone had taken over by then and I tried to get back in but he didn't give me the chance." That got me pissed off. He blatantly stole my sale without remorse. I understand that his paycheck revolves around those numbers directly but I still feel that was unethical and disrespectful because ppp sales are a serious factor in raise reviews. I know I should have taken a more aggressive stance when I went over in the first place and that is my bad, but still he should have backed off or given me credit. So that put me in a bit of a cranky mood and I lost patience when trying to exit the BART train. I was standing in the doorway trying to get off the train and was blocked by a bunch of people just standing there blocking the doorway trying to get on. I said, "Excuse me." Nobody moved, I said, "Excuse me!" and still nobody moved so then I said, "Listen up, it's one HELL of a lot easier for you all to get on the train if you let people OFF the train first, Now PLEASE step BACK!" and finally got results. The guy behind me trying to get off the train as well said, "That was stupid." and I got defensive and said, "What I said was stupid?" and he said, "NO, no no. That you had to say it at all was stupid." I laughed and said, "Ok, my faith in humanity is partially restored now."

Anyway, tomorrow I am going to take Tyrone aside and talk to him about our incident. Ugh. Bleagh. Arrrggghh. Yick.

[Shuram Gudatetris]

What a jerk.

[Cameraman Jenn]

I worked HARD today. I had to redesign and reset the composition notebooks and three hole notebook filler paper pack display today all by myself. I had to yank down over a hundred cases of composition books from top stock, move all the ones in the existing display to a new pallet, rearrange everything so it looked nice and was easily accessible, stock it up to chest height and then move the new pallet into the position of the old one. That was on top of doing two aisles of backer replacements. That entails, taking all the front boxes of file folders off the shelves, pulling out the back stock so that I have some room, sliding the backer down behind the shelves and pinning it in place then putting everything back where it belongs. I also kicked butt on cleaning messes up today and all this while running around and grabbing stuff out of lockup for customers and backup cashiering.

[Shuram Gudatetris]

I am so mad right now.

I had a really bad day, and I wrote some things about it. I was in the middle of writing some things about it. I was maybe starting to feel a little better. And then my dog came up and put his stupid head on my keyboard and he did something to close the window, erasing everything I had typed. Why does he hate me? If he is not peeing on my bed, he is peeing on my feelings.

Today I feel like everything I do is wrong. I can't do anything right. Look at this message. The paragraph above. I can't even express how I feel correctly, because stupid dogs come along and erase my thoughts.

I had a bad day at work.

But things got worse when I had to leave to come home. Leaving work for the weekend (even though it is only one day this week) is a terrible feeling for me. It means I am going to be alone until Monday. The only time I get to be with people is at work. It is pathetic. I hate it. I have been trying to make friends at work, but I am not good at it. I am not good at making friends with people. I don't know why; I am weird or something. I am and always have been that person who is always sitting by himself. In school, it was the cafeteria. Now, at work, it is the break room.

You want to hear something really pathetic? Like I said, I have been trying to make friends at work. I have been going over and sitting with people, to converse and what not. There is this one table which everyone I know sits at. A few of them I have worked with on the line before. I started spending my breaks at that table. One day, I was the first one in the break room. I decided to be brave and go ahead and sit at that table, first one at the table. Everyone ended up sitting somewhere else that day. They ALWAYS sit at that table. That really sucked. I don't sit there any more.

And yet, I don't like leaving work at the end of the week. I guess I would rather be around people who don't like me than be alone.

Oh well.

At least I have Mordant's Need to look forward to. I will finish it up tomorrow. You want to hear something weird and kind of cool about this reading of Mordant's Need? It actually is completely blowing my mind, this is so weird to me. I believe this is the fourth re-reading of the story, AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT! It has been ten years since I last read it, but that doesn't explain it. I haven't read White Fang or Call of the Wild in over 15 years and I can play them out in my head. Freaky stuff.

Absolutely loving this reading of MN. Definitely my favorite Donaldson work. (Why can't I REMEMBER it though?)

One more thing, before I polish off this piece of endless rambling, if anyone is even still reading it at this point.....I would like to apologize for my use of foul language here and everywhere on the Watch. Don't know why or when cursing and swearing started exploding out of me, but I feel ashamed by my lack of taste and tact and courtesy and anything else that I am lacking. I don't cuss much in RL, so there is absolutely no need for me to cuss here. The only thing I can say is that when I write or type, my feelings come gushing forth, and I have been feeling quite unhappy on many different levels for a while, so maybe some pent up stuff is coming out. But I truly am sorry, and I will try hard to keep myself in check.

[Shuram Gudatetris]

Cameraman Jenn,

Did you talk to Tyrone about that sale he stole? Just curious......

[Cameraman Jenn]

I did not talk to him about it yet. I had so much stuff on my plate and I just didn't have energy to spare to even think about it. I think Zainab may have said something to him about it though because during the latter half of the day he started calling me "Jennerosity." He said that was my new name because that is obviously my nature and then he also started checking in with me to see if I needed help with my stuff. He's never done that before. This coming week is our scheduled "teacher appreciation week" so we have all sorts of stuff that has to go up and we are having a continental breakfast for our "star teacher" members on this coming Saturday. It's gonna be a madhouse.

Glad to hear you are going to keep the swearing to a minimum, we try to be a family friendly site so it's appreciated. Thank you for the apology. Also glad to hear you had a fab reread of MN. Please post any scenes, passages, ideas, feelings etc. that stand out in the MN forum because I for one would love to hear it. As I have stated in the past, MN is my fave of all the SRD series, it makes me laugh out loud, cry hard and fall in love with so many characters from that writing. I've even told SRD to his face that MN is my fave of all his work and why. I think that is one of the best male writings of female characters in most fantasy literature. So many male writers just lose me when it comes to their women. Even in his other series I often feel lost. Morn, I just felt sorry for her then I tried to like her then I just disliked her and lost respect for her. Linden, I like her, understand her to a degree but I still want to slap her now (end of Fatal Revenant) and call her stupid stoopid STOOPID! (Shut up HLT, don't make me drive cross country on my scooter to kick your butt.) Unlike many, I love Terisa from the beginning despite being frustrated by her and I love her even more so as she comes into her own, ( Shut up Avatar, don't make me swim to Africa to kick your butt.) I guess I just think it's not that easy for some male writers to pull off female leads in their series but in MN I think SRD does it brilliantly but more so with his secondary female characters, from Myste, Elega, Madin, Torrence down to Saddith. Brilliant.

[Shuram Gudatetris]

Jennerosity,

Kind of sounds like he is clued in on his mistake and trying to make up for it, but if that is the case, too bad he didn't just come out and apologize directly, but that sort of thing can be hard to do.

If you can't tell already, I think he came up with an awesome nick-name for you. Reading your passages here on the Feel Today thread, plus other threads (like all things automotive, just off the top of my head), I am constantly amazed at how generous you are with support, knowledge, wisdom, caring, you name it. You are a totally cool person.



I am a man, but I more or less agree with you as far as my perspective will allow on your judgment of SRD's female characters. I bring this up, because I had a strange experience with MN and a female friend of mine IRL. I have only one RL friend who has read TCTC and she really loved them. I told her to read MN, she said she tried to but didn't like them. I asked why. She said she thought it was offensive to her as a woman. I was shocked. Speechless. I didn't know if I was pig-headed and didn't understand women at all ( hell, I was only 15 or 16 at the time) or what. Personally, I thought it showed strong female characters in the way they grew, the roles women played in the fate of the kingdom. Being a 15 yo boy, my thoughts weren't exactly worded in that manner, but it was more or less true (I believe my real thoughts were basically "hell, it's all about women. they're the stars of the book. and it's full of love stories. why would a girl not like it?") It confused the hell out of me, what she said.

She said that SRD wrote Terisa as a total ditz and he had no respect for women. I never thought to ask her what her opinion of Linden Avery was, but maybe I'll have to call her up and find out. I am curious now.

Anyway, she didn't read very far into the first book. I told her that Terisa changes as the story goes on. She just said Nah...I am not interested.

[Orlion]

It irritates me when people won't give a book the proper chance before giving up. It's usually, "I couldn't get past the first twenty pages", and I'm all, "com'n, ya whatchacallit. No book that isn't written by Hemmingway is that bad." Once a person I was talking to was a fan of drunken ol'Ernie, and tried to lecture me on why he was great. I observed that Hemmingway writes like how a drowning man swims... a lot of flopping about, until you give it up.

This literary criticism leads to my next story. So my sister FBs that she's "Not duck, because they can't type." I respond that if you put a bunch of ducks in a room with some type writers, they'll reproduce the works of Ernest Hemmingway... which amounts to several piles of crap.

Man, I'm really hating on Ernie tonight. I should talk of happier things...like Steinbeck

Oh, I found an apartment! I hope I can get along with everyone there, the last occupant sold drugs out of it... so no raucous behaviour from me the first couple of months

[lorin]

SG - Going back a few of your posts, I really understand your feelings of isolation. I followed a similar track, tending to invest all of myself into work just to escape that dread of singularity. But as the years went on I came to terms with my tendency to isolate and have learned to find some balance in my life (it's a work in progress).

I would make a few suggestions but take them with a grain of salt. They help me, but we are all individuals, with individual needs.

Take a walk every day. Bring your camera if you can. Find something beautiful, or something sad, or something interesting and capture it. Share it online like many people here do. The walking will also help your mood .

Go to Barnes and Noble or some version of it. They have a lot of free lectures and workshops. Bring your book you are reading or your laptop or a writing pad or sketch pad, get a cup of coffee. People will gravitate to you. You cannot believe how many people have spoken to me because I was reading the Trilogies.

Volunteer one day a week. Serve food to the homeless, join a group to clean the beach, work in a community garden, distribute food at a food bank. etc.


BTW - I understand about the cursing. It was something I had to get control of as well.

[Phantasm]

If you guys really want to know what lesbian hair looks like, I'll post some photos of my ex-wife.
She turned to the dark side (only joking if it offends any gay folk), during our marriage.

Best decision of her ( and mine, in hindsight) life.

[Cameraman Jenn]

Phantasm! Didn't you JUST get married? What did you DO to her? Just kidding!

Lorin, that was some sound advice. I agree.

We were slammed today at work. It was so freaking busy and for some unknown reason, Tina did NOT schedule a cashier. I was on the register about 85% of my day and backing up in the copy center the rest of the time. I got NOTHING done on my projects. Ugh. I also started to get a bit slap happy while we were slammed and silly with the customers.

Did you find everything ok today?
Did you need any ink, toner or postage stamps?
Do you have a rewards card with us?
Would you like one?
Did you need a bag for your purchases?
Are there any more questions I can ask you that you will say no to?
Are you sure? are ya positive? do you swear it?

I even got smarmy with some guy customers and when they said no thanks to the rewards card I said, "Are you sure cuz it means you get to give me your phone number." and winked in a ridiculously dramatic way. Every guy I did that to laughed and signed up. I got nine rewards cards for that line. Then Mary told me I should not do that so I stopped. I also sold five protection plans today with this lightening spiel:

"This product has available for an additional, insert price here, which covers you for two years against any product failure including accidental damage so if you get mad at it and drop it out the window and it gets run over by an AC Transit bus, just go pick up the pieces and call the number and you will get a gift card for the purchase price back in the mail and you can come spend it on anything in the store, be it an upgraded newer version of (insert product type here) a new gps, a laptop or a cart full of gargantuan bags of peanut m&ms to give you a nice sugar and endorphin rush to combat your depression over breaking the product in the first place."

I say it all in a rush and barely stop for breath. Even if it doesn't sell the plan it sure gets laughs. That's probably against acceptable selling practices as well but it works. Unfortunately the plans I did sell were all small ones with the biggest one being $14.99. Still, we made our daily goal. We also exceeded our goal for postage stamps by a large margin due in large part to me. Tyler got a few sales on them too but she just says stamps so I think a lot of customers don't realize we mean the USPS forever stamps. I always say postage stamps and that seems to get attention, people often say, "You sell postage stamps? Great, saves me a trip to the post office."

I also had two great dog moments today. I had a line but this customer had this lab/pitbull/greatdane mix and when he came up to the register I said, "Folks, I know you want to cash out and go about your day but you just have to give me a quick moment." Then I squatted down a bit and said, "Who's a good doggie?" and the dog practically knocked me over so I enthusiastically scratched the dog's neck and ears and shoulders while he gave me kisses all over my neck and all the while I gave a running commentary to the dog, "Who gives the best kisses, what a good puppers, ohhh, sweet puppy, good puppy, who loves the puppies? Jenn loves the puppies, who's the bestest doggles, you are the bestest doggles. what a good dog." When I straightened up to get back to work, I made a dramatic wiping display of my face and neck from the sloppy dog kisses and said to the customer, "Thanks for indulging me, I really needed that." All the customers were smiling and the one with the dog mentioned how impressed he was with my way with his dog. I told him, "Dogs know a dog lover when they smell them however I am going to be in BIG trouble when I get home to my dog." The other one was a little corgi/unknown mix whom I met in one of my very brief moments off the register. I had gotten back on the register so we met up again in line and she was all jazzed to see me again and get more loving. Her name was Goldie. She was practically leaping out of the shopping cart and onto my counter when I said, "There's my Goldie girl, who's my good special Goldie girl?" It was super cute.

Anyway, I should quit boring you all with all the details of my life. I have tomorrow off which I need but then this week I have split days off which sucks. My next day off is Thursday. Super Ugh.

[Cameraman Jenn]

Oh wait! Apparently I'm not done boring you all...

I met this super cool kid today when I stopped for food on my way in to work. I was running short of time so I went for fast food which is rare, McDonalds even. The one by Montgomery station has weird seating up top so it's like a bar but you sit across from a stranger for lack of other seats and I am not about to haul my scooter up and down the stairs. So I parked the scooter at the end of the double bar setup and then when I got my food I sat at the end seat across from this 9 year old kid. He was eyeing my scooter pretty hard. He started asking me about it and so we talked power, output, speed, charge time, legalities etc and then he told me he was heavy into skateboarding. We talked about surfing and skateboarding and stuff and then I guess his Dad realized what we were talking about and pipes in, "He's won many contests in amateur skateboarding and had an article done about him in (a skateboard mag of which I am drawing a blank on the name)." He got all red and told his Dad stop bragging about that. Then I found out he wanted to get into dirt bikes but his Mom won't let him. I told him that if he was good on a skateboard he should think about surfing so I think I motivated a soon to be new surfer today. I also confessed that I am a terrible surfer and skateboarder but I love boogie boarding. It was fun. At one point his Dad told him to stop bugging me so I could eat and I said, "OH no, he's just fine, I am actually quite enjoying this conversation and your son is obviously a very intelligent, well spoken and interesting young man." The dad smiled and said thanks. I was impressed with the kid because he was not only polite, well spoken and smart but humble and yet brave enough to start up a conversation with a complete stranger because he had a genuine interest in something new. That kid is going places. I bring this up because it always makes me feel really good about humanity when I meet a kid with great manners, smarts and humility in this age of rude entitlement and ill manners. I also bring it up because it contrasts with the three kids who swarmed me on the train on my way home. They got on at the same station and their mom sat perpendicular two benches away from me and the youngest kid, the boy sits in the seat directly next to me and says, "What kind of scooter is that?" and I replied, "It's an electric scooter." He starts asking me all sorts of questions about how it works and so forth and his two older sisters get involved and then he has to start touching stuff on the scooter so see how it works and the girls have to do it too and I hear the people across from the kid's Mom say to her, "Your kids are all over that lady." and her response is, "She doesn't seem to mind so unless she loses patience I could use the respite." I kept my patience, let them paw my scooter, answered questions, let them fold the handle bars repeatedly and turn on and off and on and off and on and off the headlights. I was told by the oldest girl that I should buy her one and give her one of my headlights because i have two and only need one. I was told that they were going to ask for one on their Christmas lists (despite the fact that it's only August), and was informed that they would be willing to share mine with me in the meantime. I practiced perfect patience but I was relieved when they got off at West Oakland. In their defense, they were nice kids but very little boundaries. The other thing about these interactions, both parents had three kids. Super Kid had two younger brothers and the middle one was sitting next to him and waited patiently to interject his questions, obviously holding older bro in great respect. Dad was focusted on the youngest most of the time. With the kids on the way home, the oldest had a bad habit of talking over the other two, demanding attention and so did youngest brother to a degree. Middle girl, when she tried to get in on the pawing my bike action the other two tried to over ride her and I had to say, "Hey now, wait a minute, it's her turn, she's waited patiently." and told the other two to stop so she could get her fair turn in. She seemed to be pretty grateful for that. They stopped but I think they were shocked to be told to wait especially because the older girl tried to horn in on the middle kid's time and I said, "It's still her turn, you must wait." in a tone that brooked no argument. She did but didn't look happy about it which leads me to believe they have had some lessons in manners but it's been inconsistently enforced. Ah well, enough judging. Thanks for listening to Jenn's nightly tirade. I love you all.

[Phantasm]

Ha ha, I've been married to my wife for over 10 years. It's my EX wife I was talking about

[Lord of the Gyre]

HEY GUYS IT'S MY TURN

So during the first two years of high school this girl and I were pretty much best friends. As much as I wished, nothing went on between us. She dated a few of my friends and I dated a few of hers. Then comes junior year, and we have a "talk". We end up together till the end of the year, where she graduates and I don't get to see her. I was sad but managed to deal with that. However, I graduated a year ago and we started talking about 9 months ago. We've gotten pretty close, although not as close as I thought. Since we've been on dates and done all that couple-y stuff, I thought we were together. However, I brought up how much I care about her and she just flat out says "I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry."

Anyways, this isn't a LiveJournal and I'm not emo or anything, but yeah, that's how I feel. Plus I wanted to steal the spotlight

[Sorus]

Are there any more questions I can ask you that you will say no to?

Stealing that line. Seriously, I have grabbed it and am now fleeing.

I am... meh. Had major dental surgery today, which I've needed for the last 3+ months. Yay for no longer being in agony (at least when the 'people have been drilling holes in my head' feelings subside a bit), not so much yay for Wells Fargo now owning my soul and any 'extra' income I have for the next century or so. Why is dental work so frakking expensive?

[lorin]

I am... meh. Had major dental surgery today, which I've needed for the last 3+ months. Yay for no longer being in agony (at least when the 'people have been drilling holes in my head' feelings subside a bit), not so much yay for Wells Fargo now owning my soul and any 'extra' income I have for the next century or so. Why is dental work so frakking expensive?

Dental surgery is no joke. Yay for codeine!!!


Jenn, I actually think you did quite well in the roving kids department. Nobody tried to steal the scooter from you, nobody had a tantrum when you didn't share it with them and nobody called the police because a stranger was talking to their kids!!!:biggrin:

Somebody come here and push me out the door..... I feel like I CANNOT face another day at work. It's a sad state of affairs when I am jealous of my clients sitting home on welfare, sleeping till 1pm, eating tons of fried food, drinking beer and chillin'............. (where is the BIG GREEN MONSTER icon?)

[Cameraman Jenn]

Sorus, after I say that line, the customer usually laughs and apologizes and I tell them, "All this rejection, it's starting to give me a complex but I guess that's what they have meds for." Then I laugh and say just kidding.

Today was another day of slinging paper cases and cases of compostion notebooks around. I think I am getting composition notebook tunnel in my wrists and paper case elbow. I worked midshift today and Zainab was the night manager so when she came in she announced that the night crew had done so well with freight that the store was buying them pizza for dinner. They were all excited. She ordered the pizza and it came and I was just getting off work and the guys attacked the small cheese pizza that was there and hardly touched the large one. Zainab came in and was like, "Who ate all my pizza?" then took what was left and stomped out. Apparently she didn't bother ASKING what kind the guys wanted and just went ahead and ordered some southwestern chicken barbecue pizza with jalapeno peppers which NONE of the guys would even touch. I know she didn't ask because after she stomped out I said, "Did she ask you what you guys wanted on the pizza?" and they both said, "No." She could have saved the store a bunch of money and had happy guys if she just ordered them a half pepperoni, half sausage pizza. So stupid.

On other notes, Kristen was talking about wanting a boyfriend today so I gave her the third degree on her requirements. I'm actually surprised she doesn't have one because she is very pretty, petite, smart and very sweet natured. At the end of the night, she was on register and there were some elderly ladies in line and I walked up and whispered, "What about that guy over in the copy center, he's really handsome." She craned her neck but couldn't see him and told me so. The ladies were looking at us funny, wondering what was going on so I said, "I'm just checking out cute guys for Kristen." and they giggled and turned to look at the guy I was pointing out. At that point Kristen got a glimpse of him and she said, "Oh he's cute but he looks older." since the ladies in line were already in on it we were just talking in normal voice so I said, "Yes but look him in the eyes, he has very gentle beautiful eyes and he is a looker." One of the ladies said, "Oh yes he is. You got an eye for black men for a white girl." We were all laughing at that.

[aliantha]

Anybody who orders pizza for a crowd with a bunch of wacky toppings on it is just asking for there to be a ton of pizza left over. Wow, that chick is clueless.

Congrats on the apartment, Orlion!

Magickmaker and I went camping over the weekend. It was fun, despite the rain.... The summer's winding down for us, but trying to nail down Magickmaker about when she has to be back on campus is like trying to nail Jello to a wall. My problem is when to take off work to take her. I might just take two weeks off, from the 23rd through Labor Day (Sept. 6, for our non-Yanks). I've got enough PTO to do it. It still won't save me from the possibility of making two trips to Roanoke within a week, tho....