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Foul's Microwave Madness!

Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 4:04 am
by Worm of Despite
Hello kiddies! *Laughs like the Crypt Keeper*

Today, we are going to learn how to make

HOT CHEESE WHIZ(woo hoo!:bounce03:)

Step 1: empty a full container of Cheeze Whiz into the bowl. Just for fun, sing The Official Cheeze Whiz Song as you do it!

[The Official Cheeze Whiz Song
Words by the English Language and Some Vernacular/Deliberate Spelling Jargon,
Lyrics by Foul/McCartney


Well, I'm dumping cheeze whiz
And I'm okay
I dump cheeze whiz night and day
And I like to wear women's clothing!
*GASP*
All we are saying, is give cheese a chance
!]

Okay, now, the Cheeze Whiz is properly dispersed within the bowl, aye? Okay! Make sure it's ALL in there, and don't skimp! We want MAXIMUM effect!

Step 2: insert into microwave and heat for 7:14 minutes, exactly. Make sure the cheese you used has been in the fridge--not in a cupboard or some place! I'm saying, folks, it must be cold--not room temperature! Otherwise, you're not getting the MAXIMUM effect. All right, seven minutes up? Well, I do hope you have some chips for dipping into the heated Cheez Whiz! If so, it's smooth sailing. If you don't, use you're fingers. I am not responsible for how you eat this Cheese Whiz. Please see the small disclaimer. By the way, you may put a little essence of Foul--BAM, like that--into it. Enjoy!

[Short Disclaimer: This thread is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each cheque separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. Condoms may be applicable in some situations. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may fade. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. Bite the head cleanly off the sperm. List was current at time of printing. Return to sender, address unknown. no such number, no such phone, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Remove all packaging according to instructions in set up booklet. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flames. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Your home is at risk if you do not keep up repayments. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Aardvarks admitted on Tuesdays only. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free number before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. Package sold by weight, not volume. Your mileage may vary]

Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 10:41 am
by phoebe
8O

Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 12:28 pm
by Damelon
:LOLS:

I hope your not in charge of the microwave at home. :wink:

Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 1:00 pm
by Infelice
A terrifying thought, Damelon :)

Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 7:32 pm
by Reisheiruhime
He might be. It is a very scary thing to think that LORD FOUL himself would be in charge of the microvave. Scaaarry.... 8O

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 1:16 am
by The Leper Fairy
me and 2 of my guy friends microwaved a banana the other day. we put it in for 88:88 but stopped it after 88 seconds because it started to steam/smoke... when we took it out it smelled exactly like ham 8O ...bleugh

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 2:57 am
by Infelice
Did it taste like chicken? ;) :D

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 3:48 am
by The Leper Fairy
If you ever microwave one, you'll realize why none of us wanted it near our mouths. Unstead we cut it in half, squeezed it out and tried catpulting it into the sink...we missed.

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 3:50 am
by Infelice
I'm getting pretty disgusting images. ;)

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 4:06 am
by The Leper Fairy
You should try it! Heeee C'mon, you know you want to! The microwave is calling you. :)

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 4:09 am
by Infelice
And the bananas are screaming , "Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!" :)

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2003 4:19 am
by The Leper Fairy
Yes well, don't listen to them. They don't know what they're talking about.

Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2003 12:57 am
by Reisheiruhime
*waves a banana in the air* It's a female canteloupe I tell you! :screwy:

Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2003 4:07 pm
by The Leper Fairy
No no, everyone knows that pineapples are the female canteloupes. Jeez Turiya! get it straight! hee.:D

Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2003 9:25 pm
by Reisheiruhime
No, here, the banana is the female canteloupe. :D We have different customs here in Hickville. :)

Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2003 3:03 am
by Infelice
Bananas = cantaloupes??????? *shakes head*

I'm confused. The Aussie name for a canteloupe is a rock melon. Bananas are just plain old bananas or nanas depending on how old you are. :)

Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2003 4:20 am
by Skyweir
love rock melon .. but the only thing i like to eat cooked in a microwave .. is popcorn ;)

Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2003 4:21 am
by Skyweir
oh and asparagus ..

yeah ok .. a variety of veggies ;)

Re: Foul's Microwave Madness!

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2003 9:23 am
by Biff
Lord Foul wrote:Hello kiddies! *Laughs like the Crypt Keeper*

Today, we are going to learn how to make

HOT CHEESE WHIZ(woo hoo!:bounce03:)

Step 1: empty a full container of Cheeze Whiz into the bowl. Just for fun, sing The Official Cheeze Whiz Song as you do it!

[The Official Cheeze Whiz Song
Words by the English Language and Some Vernacular/Deliberate Spelling Jargon,
Lyrics by Foul/McCartney


Well, I'm dumping cheeze whiz
And I'm okay
I dump cheeze whiz night and day
And I like to wear women's clothing!
*GASP*
All we are saying, is give cheese a chance
!]

Okay, now, the Cheeze Whiz is properly dispersed within the bowl, aye? Okay! Make sure it's ALL in there, and don't skimp! We want MAXIMUM effect!

Step 2: insert into microwave and heat for 7:14 minutes, exactly. Make sure the cheese you used has been in the fridge--not in a cupboard or some place! I'm saying, folks, it must be cold--not room temperature! Otherwise, you're not getting the MAXIMUM effect. All right, seven minutes up? Well, I do hope you have some chips for dipping into the heated Cheez Whiz! If so, it's smooth sailing. If you don't, use you're fingers. I am not responsible for how you eat this Cheese Whiz. Please see the small disclaimer. By the way, you may put a little essence of Foul--BAM, like that--into it. Enjoy!

[Short Disclaimer: This thread is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each cheque separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. Condoms may be applicable in some situations. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may fade. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. Bite the head cleanly off the sperm. List was current at time of printing. Return to sender, address unknown. no such number, no such phone, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Remove all packaging according to instructions in set up booklet. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flames. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Your home is at risk if you do not keep up repayments. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Aardvarks admitted on Tuesdays only. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free number before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. Package sold by weight, not volume. Your mileage may vary]
You forgot: Wash in cold water with like colors, tumble dry, light iron as needed. Made in Mexico, Taiwan or China. COD Only. And Kosher meals available upon request.

I may barrow this if it's ok... ;)

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2003 8:25 pm
by Skyweir
LOL .. as you wish ;)

Wesley voice ;)