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emotional leper
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Post by emotional leper »

Help. Please, please, help.

I'm being stalked by underage pentecostals I met in Nashville while drunk.

The Story:

I went to visit one of my old college roommates, Angelique. She works in HR at the Gaylord Opryland hotel in Nashville, and was able to get us a room at a discounted rate.

There was a pentecostal convention there while we were there. So my ass, after getting rather drunk at one hotel bar, and then the other, when the first closed, is wandering around, in rockstar garb, with my blue hair, and my strat on my back.

And somehow I ended up entertaining a group of roughly 20 underage pentecostals for about 6 hours with tales and guitarplaying and general stupidity.

AND NOW THEY ARE STALKING ME THROUGH MYSPACE.

I think I shouldn't have told them my name.

Or spelled it for them.

Or written it down.

HELP.

I'M BEING STALKED BY UNDERAGE PENTECOSTALS!
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Post by Avatar »

Corrupt them.

--A
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Worm of Despite
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Post by Worm of Despite »

Avatar wrote:Corrupt them.

--A
That's my line!! :lf:
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:twisted:

You've been away. ;)

--A
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lucimay
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Post by lucimay »

there's no help for it, will robinson. they must acccept you ass their personal savior.
Image
you're more advanced than a cockroach,
have you ever tried explaining yourself
to one of them?
~ alan bates, the mothman prophecies


i've had this with actors before, on the set,
where they get upset about the [size of my]
trailer, and i'm always like...take my trailer,
cause... i'm from Kentucky
and that's not what we brag about.
~ george clooney, inside the actor's studio


a straight edge for legends at
the fold - searching for our
lost cities of gold. burnt tar,
gravel pits. sixteen gears switch.
Haphazard Lucy strolls by.
~ dennis r wood ~
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balon!
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Post by balon! »

Avatar wrote:Corrupt them.

--A
:haha:

Oh my god. That was hilarious.
Avatar wrote:But then, the answers provided by your imagination are not only sometimes best, but have the added advantage of being unable to be wrong.
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Moxinomal
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Post by Moxinomal »

Avatar wrote:Corrupt them.

--A
I feel the repeating of this is necessary.
Embracing me is to embrace the true way your mind works. Let yourself not be hindered by the false.
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Cagliostro
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Post by Cagliostro »

Tarnished Sword wrote:
Avatar wrote:Corrupt them.

--A
I feel the repeating of this is necessary.
Me too.
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Life is a waste of time
Time is a waste of life
So get wasted all of the time
And you'll have the time of your life
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The Leper Fairy
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Post by The Leper Fairy »

Lucimay wrote:they must acccept you ass their personal savior.
I definitely read that as "They must accept your ass as their personal savior".
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Pie and Cake
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wayfriend
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Post by wayfriend »

The Leper Fairy wrote:
Lucimay wrote:they must acccept you ass their personal savior.
I definitely read that as "They must accept your ass as their personal savior".
That wasn't what she said?
.
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dANdeLION
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Post by dANdeLION »

This is what you get for proclaiming 'House' jumped the shark.
Dandelion don't tell no lies
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion

I'm afraid there's no denying
I'm just a dandelion
a fate I don't deserve.

High priest of THOOOTP

:hobbes: *

* This post carries Jay's seal of approval
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lucimay
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Post by lucimay »

Wayfriend wrote:
The Leper Fairy wrote:
Lucimay wrote:they must acccept you ass their personal savior.
I definitely read that as "They must accept your ass as their personal savior".
That wasn't what she said?
did i mean to say you ass or YOUR ass as or what? :screwy:
you're more advanced than a cockroach,
have you ever tried explaining yourself
to one of them?
~ alan bates, the mothman prophecies


i've had this with actors before, on the set,
where they get upset about the [size of my]
trailer, and i'm always like...take my trailer,
cause... i'm from Kentucky
and that's not what we brag about.
~ george clooney, inside the actor's studio


a straight edge for legends at
the fold - searching for our
lost cities of gold. burnt tar,
gravel pits. sixteen gears switch.
Haphazard Lucy strolls by.
~ dennis r wood ~
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emotional leper
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Post by emotional leper »

I guess it doesn't help that I am the Naz, with God given Ass...


...Atleast I didn't sleep with any of them.

Oh well. On to the corrupting.

Should I just immediately suggest they all real Lord Foul's Bane, or start with something softer?
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Cagliostro
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Post by Cagliostro »

Actually, I was thinking something more extreme. But maybe Lord Foul's Bane is the place to start. Along with a side of Fantasy Bedtime Hour.
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Post by wayfriend »

Emotional Leper wrote:Should I just immediately suggest they all real Lord Foul's Bane, or start with something softer?
I would start with Grand Theft Auto.
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emotional leper
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Post by emotional leper »

God. The last thing I need is underage girls fawning over me again.

And is Grand Theft Auto supposed to be the 'soft' alternative to LFB?
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Cagliostro
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Post by Cagliostro »

Emotional Leper wrote:God. The last thing I need is underage girls fawning over me again.
I can't help but quote the chorus of a Warren Zevon song:
Poor, poor pitiful me
Poor, poor pitiful me
These young girls won't let me be
Lord have mercy on me
Woe is me
Suck it up, brother.
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Life is a waste of time
Time is a waste of life
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emotional leper
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Post by emotional leper »

Cagliostro wrote:
Emotional Leper wrote:God. The last thing I need is underage girls fawning over me again.
I can't help but quote the chorus of a Warren Zevon song:
Poor, poor pitiful me
Poor, poor pitiful me
These young girls won't let me be
Lord have mercy on me
Woe is me
Suck it up, brother.
The Underage have a flavour.

It's jailtime.

One of those girls, I got to sing happy birthday to. She'd just turned 15.

...

I felt so dirty.
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Waddley
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Post by Waddley »

Best way to corrupt young girls? Sleep with them. But, that aside... GTA won't work- they're girls.

If you want to go the video game route, WoW is your best bet.

If you want to go the book route, I wouldn't suggest LFB to start with... maybe something easier to get into, less rape (to start with) maybe a nice George RR Martin or the Mordent's Need series.

If you want to go the TV route, make them watch the first couple seasons of Weeds.

Oh, and alcohol. Make sure they understand that the best way to enjoy themselves is with a nice girly drink.
"Let my inspiration flow in token rhyme, suggesting rhythm." -Robert Hunter
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CovenantJr
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Post by CovenantJr »

Urotsukidoji :shifty:
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