Kevin's Watch

Over 20 years ago I was working in a sawmill. I liked this guy and it was clear that he liked me. He was flirting... well maybe I was too.

Then I found out he had started dating another woman in the sawmill. She knew I liked him, and she flaunted the whole thing. "Me and Bobby this, Bobby and I that." I knew she didn't give a rip about him, and I was disappointed in him for dating her kind anyway. Because of that, it kinda stung.

So I wrote him the following valentine card and passed it to him, unsigned, through a friend. (The cover picture was a heart with an evil grin):

To make someone mad was my evil intent.
So here is a card with a malicious bent.
It wasn't expensive, it didn't cost bucks.
Here's hoping your Valentine's Day really sucks!

It gave me such an exhilarating feeling!! I was satisfied. Bobby, on the other hand, was perturbed. He showed it to the woman he was dating and told her he was breaking up with her because he hadn't realized that I really cared about him. Needless to say the woman did her best to make my life miserable for the next six months (which just amused me, really)-- until Bobby and I got engaged, when she conceded graciously and actually congratulated me.

Anyway, we've been married 20 years now. Bobby still has that valentine.

DotD,

Sincerest congratulations to you and your husband on your anniversary! Best wishes for another 20 (and then another 20 and ...)!

Andy

Here's it's near twin, the email that got me a wife. Even though it reads as a book.

Carla and I had gone out on a few dates, the first being the best first date I had ever been on. I thought we were clicking pretty good, but Carla is the type of person that tends to overthink a bit, and can be very guarded with her heart. She had kind of been hemming and hawing about considering us a couple, and was in fact seeing another person when we first met. I kept pursuing her, and was starting to get a little frustrated at how she was running pretty hot and cold with me. So, I had told her something about my view of the ending of Pippin (a stage musical) and how it relates to my view of love. So I sent her this. You don't need to know the play, but it helps at the beginning. It does move beyond after a bit. She claims this is what finally broke her down and made her decide to give me a chance:

Yeah, so...I guess it is less of an interpretation of Pippin than it is a musing on love. But it all connects, even when it sounds like rambling. Anyway, let's begin at the beginning. Pippin, kind of the Tarot concept of the Fool, begins his journey wanting to experience all that life has to offer, and the Players back him up. He wants his life to be filled with out of the ordinary things, y'know...the "keep reaching for the stars" cliche. He is searching for meaning in his life. In his search for excitement, adventure and really wild things, he has a go at leadership, power, the glory of war, sex (presented pastorally), drugs (yes, there was a hookah in the DVD), knowledge, wisdom, love (ah yes, love...above all things, love), fatherhood, domesticity, and so forth. In the end, he is presented with the Grand Finale, which is to go out in a blaze of glory. To be remembered forever. To torch himself for the entertainment of the audience. But instead he chooses love, and is removed from the excitement and adventure and really wild things.
Is it a cop out? Did Pippin utterly fail to achieve greatness? Or did he recognize them as glamours and find truth and meaning in something he didn't foresee? Certainly the Players didn't forsee this. I think the main Player may have seen this, as he was always rather mean to Catherine, as well as the little boy. The Players wanted him to put on a good show, though they never had a vested interest in him, as they chuckled all evil-like during his failures.
So did they expect him to fail from the beginning? Perhaps, because they were looking toward the Grand Finale. If they saw him fail, it would push him toward this "greatness" of going out in a grand style.
As for Pippin, he experienced a lot of what life had to offer. He was looking for meaning, and he ultimately found it in another, as well as a family unit. What was his reward? He is stripped of everything. At least everything that used to matter...magic, costumes, music, etc. Does that deter him? No.
There is a story I wish I could find in a Robert Anton Wilson book about, I think it is Isis, entering a heaven of some sort. In order to enter, she is stripped of everything: clothing, defenses, ego, etc. Only then can she achieve bliss. I always found this a very interesting story, and seems to fit what it takes to be happy in life. And love. Once you can remove defenses, ego, and yes...clothing (to be a little naughty) and be completely bare (metaphorically speaking), can you experience love. You have to allow yourself to be vulnerable, and that is the frightening bit about love. That's why it is so devastating when you lay yourself so bare in front of another only to have them reject you. I always felt like the end of Pippin relates to this. He is stripped of everything and is laid bare...yet he still retains strength in love. And it is in this sheer naked vulnerability in which he finds what really matters to him, and what he finds meaning in. Whether or not you agree with this or not is completely up to interpretation.
When I first saw Pippin, I had thought that it was a sad ending; that he gave in and settled for something ordinary instead of being the thing he always sought. Later, I still found it depressing as a social comment about aging, and how we give up all the hopes and dreams we previously had for something ordinary. My latest interpretation though is that it is a beautiful ending, and that it really shines through the meaningfulness of love. And that searching for constant excitement, adventure, and really wild things ultimately leads to self-destruction. After all, the Grand Finale is self-immolation, which always confused me with my previous interpretations. But yes...it is still open for interpretation.
There is a song by Bob Walkenhorst called Mystery Road. A part I always found especially profound and wonderful is this section:

There's two stories of life that contain all the facts
One's told to your front, the other's told to your back
Which one to believe, well, that's all up to you
Also to decide which one will come true
Is it the one where love is the pounding of a drum
An old soldier on a hill, an army of one?
Is it the one where love is the space between two
A harmony?

It is well known that I think Bob Walkenhorst is one the best lyric writers ever. So many of his songs are very meaningful to me. But this one in particular. The "stories of life" basically boil down to this: do you find more meaning in being strong within yourself and independence and not needing anyone else, and all that noise, or do you find more meaning in love? Yes, the damnable books of romance (and I'm not speaking Harlequin here, as those are more about the splash and the thunder and this hiss) have influenced me in such a way that I believe in the second "story of life." Does this lead to happiness? Sometimes...sometimes not. It downright hurts sometimes. But the highs are so very high, and the lows are so very low. It's what living is all about, in my opinion...feeling all that life has to offer. But this is why I find honesty in emotion the way for me. It sucks to be hurt, but if you don't lay yourself bare and allow yourself to become vulnerable, then it is much more difficult to experience the utter bliss that can follow. That is why I don't see any sense in playing the games that go along with dating, and why I rush in, sometimes too fast as you know, and lay myself bare. It's what I've done for much of my dating life. I see no other way to approach it because of my beliefs. And I find strength in my vulnerability. I think it makes me a good, decent person. I know that a lot of people are frightened by it, because they don't see it often enough in life, and don't trust it. But I think it is the best way to live a life, and if everyone lived in honesty and compassion, wouldn't the world be a better place?
And no...I haven't been drinking. Well, a little cream soda, but no alcohol.

Now if I could only resolve my feelings towards animals, and the desire to want to eat them, then I would be a less conflicted person.

That's awesome, Cag.

And DotD -- congrats on 20 years!

I'd just like to point out that we can see in this thread no better example of how men and women are different.

Woman sends a man a funny/cruel "roses are red" type of Valentine and.....Success!

Man sends a woman a lengthy in depth heart felt letter and......Success!


Does anyone honestly think either would have worked if it was reversed?










(Yeah I know, I'm sure it happens that way too )

Wow!! Cag, I'd give you a chance after that e-mail too!!

Tolkien: No, it wouldn't work. Men are scared off by heart-baring. IMHO.

I found out after posting this that in the 1700s, there was a fad of sending spoof Valentines like mine-- called "penny dreadfuls". I had no idea I was so retro.

All I can say Cag, is:
"everything has its season
everything has its time
show me a reason
and I'll soon show you a rhyme
(I know way to many musicals.)
And for all the younger men: you can get a girl this way, but if you do, you better be ready to back it up, or break up ugly. She will never EVER EVER cease to remind you how deep and sensitive you were/are.
"Seriously, hun, I love you...but I'll never feel like cuddling when the Raiders are winning, or when I'm tending my battered ribs after a tournament..."
[stealing from SRD <rueful grin>