Kevin's Watch

It is with great sadness and much regret that I advise you of Esmers passing.

His mother sent me this today.

...........
In Loving Memory of Esmer


Esmer unexpectedly passed away August 14, 2019, in Utica, N.Y. He was born August 26, 1966, in Fulton, NY, and graduated high school in 1983. Esmer worked in construction, and computer set-up and repair. He is survived by his mother, his brother and his sister plus several nieces and nephews.

A memorial and scattering of his ashes is scheduled for August 31, 2019.

I have sent her my condolences and said he is a loss to our community and he will be sorely missed by those of us that knew him.

+JMJ+

Requiem aeternam dona ei, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat ei.

Solsbury Hill

one of the first songs Es and I bonded over.
I've been missing him for a while now. we kind of fell out
and tho we also kind of made up, it was never the same
between us.
but I thought of him as my brother, tho maybe a bit errant, brother nonetheless.
I loved him dearly but probably not well enough.
I wish i'd been a better friend to him.
I thank you Sky for being there for him when I couldn't.

Esmer was the contradiction after which he named himself. He could be a confounding or occasionally insufferable bastard (kindred spirits, us), yet I was never mad at him and I'm more than a little bummed out to hear of his passing. He never put up with bullshit, and I respected the hell out of that, even if we sometimes disagreed on what qualified.

The truly weird thing about him is that he got me, the guy behind the Syl persona, and strangely still seemed to respect me, even when I had to lay down the law of the land. I'd like to think I returned the respect and the understanding as much as one could without depriving him of that gnostic inscrutability he prized.

A while ago, he posted to Facebook, "Revolving doors are fun, but eventually, either you're in or your out," tagging me in it. I was confused until he clued me in that it was something I'd said here years ago. And then I was astounded. One, because I have a pretty good memory and had forgotten it entirely, and two that someone felt I was worth quoting.

Anyway, here's hoping he finds the Yaqui masters out there. And sends a postcard if he can.

thanks Syl, I couldn't have said it better.
(and for the record, there was few people he respected more than he respected you and I know that for a fact.)

I am hoping for a postcard as well.

Shine On You Crazy Diamond
(I love this version because I love Doyle Bramhall III and Snowy White! also...this song is in two parts, two videos on you tube but it will automatically click to the next part when part one is finished)

Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun
Shine on you crazy diamond
Now there's a look in your eyes, like black holes in the sky
Shine on you crazy diamond
You were caught on the crossfire of childhood and stardom
Blown on the steel breeze
Come on you target for faraway laughter
Come on you stranger, you legend, you martyr, and shine
You reached for the secret too soon, you cried for the moon
Shine on you crazy diamond
Threatened by shadows at night, and exposed in the light
Shine on you crazy diamond
Well you wore out your welcome with random precision
Rode on the steel breeze
Come on you raver, you seer of visions
Come on you painter, you piper, you prisoner, and shine



^one of Esmer's longtime avatars^

I never experienced any of the negative side of Esmer. I heard he had been banned for a while, but never knew why. I only experienced a thoughtful, energetic, strongly opinioned Esmer. We didn't agree on our worldview, but there was never an ounce of disrespect involved. If Solsbury Hill is any indication, he was a person of great taste!

Rest in peace, JD.

Esmers mum sent this today and I share it in loving memory of our Crazy shining diamond


Yesterday, the family and I held a memorial ceremony to scatter David's ashes under a special tree. He called it the Wizard Tree and whenever he came to visit he would sit at the base of the tree and meditate for hours. So, that's where his ashes are. It all helped. I have attached a four-season picture of the tree (which David asked for).

Esmers mum advised that the condolences I sent her from myself and our community were read out in Eulogy to Esmer at the Scattering Of Ashes.
I was very touched by that.

Well hell.

That's a bit of a shock.

Doubly glad now that he made time to pop in recently.

The world is poorer without him in some weird way, and us along with it.

--A

I didn't know Esmer, really, but I'm sure we had some contact, because I remember him as the Laughing Man and with that avatar above. I think much of his presence was felt before my time, and certainly before my time as a mod. I've certainly heard of him for years, sadly as one of the few bans.
Sad to see the passing of someone who made such an influence in our little collection of imaginary friends.

::lights a 40::

I will remember him as a source of endless entertainment.
We are reduced by his passing but we are greatful for his presence in our lives

I hope Esmer is having a really good time wherever he is in the afterlife. I didn't interact with him much, myself, but know that he made some creative threads and showed wonderful humor, both as "Esmer" and as "The Laughing Man". May his laughter ring on.

Saddened to hear this.

Often perplexed by Esmer but that was a good thing. I am sad his voice is no longer. My belated condolences to his family and friends.
-MEL