Kevin's Watch

I liked it, even tho it was waaaay farfetched and a little animated...so what. It 's entertainment. And good looking main characters. Lots of lines to provoke thought, and make you go hmmmm.
Oh yea. I like it. I'd see it again.

Worst
Movie
Ever

The only movie besides Bats that I ever got up to go watch a different movie. Right down there with League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

Seriously, there wasn't a single original idea in the whole movie. Completely ripped off score from Last Crusade, every cliched line possible, "baddies" that make you laugh (not in a good way), stereotypical bumbling sidekick... blah. The only way you could ever get me to watch this movie again would be to bring back MST3K.

I agree with Syl. Although, it wasn't as bad as Batman and Robin. And nothing will ever be as gloriously bad as Manos: the Hands of Fate!

I was thinking about going to see it. Thanks for the warnings.

Well, I liked League of Extraordinary Gentlemen!
& I really want to go see VanHelsing, soon.
I grew up on B & C rated scifi movies (Creature from the Black Lagoon et al.) - I don't even realy need MST to enjoy most of these movies, although, MST is a HILARIOUS way to watch a movie.

Earthy

I like B movies for a few laughs, too, but Van Helsing is just wrong. It's the Gigli of creature features. A campy B movie isn't really trying, anyway. But Van Helsing had big stars, big production. There's nothing worse than when a movie that's actually trying hard fails hard (Battlefield Earth).

Hey I thought it was cool. A lot of ass-kicking involved. My kinda movie.

I LOVED Van Helsing!!!!! I saw it twice.
The first time I saw it, I was expecting it to be really bad, but when I came out of the theatre I had really enjoyed myself.
The second time I saw it, I picked up on heaps more jokes, and it was just as entertaining.
It also had one of my favourite actors in it: David Wenham.

You giving duchess some competition with gif's? I love the wave!!

gif's?

Your emoticons. They have .gif extensions. Some pictures have .jpg instead. I don't know anything about the technical reasons why, but all the emoticons I've ever seen are gif's.

But now that I think about it, just because I just saw that wave for the first time on your post doesn't necessarily mean you're the one who found it and brought it to the Watch. Ah well... Really off the topic of this thread now, eh? Somebody should tell the mod about this!!

This film sucks, you suck, everybody sucks.

(go to your happy place Darth, go to your happy place.... )

*Goes to happy place*

Caer Sylvanus wrote:Worst
Movie
Ever

The only movie besides Bats that I ever got up to go watch a different movie. Right down there with League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

These are by far the worst movies I've ever seen (except Bats which I haven't seen - will take your word for it though). I can't even decide which one is worse... although I think Van Helsuck was slightly better. But at least LXG didn't go over the top with the special effects. Both were mind-numbingly predictable.

I felt like leaving halfway through too, but I wanted my $7.50's worth. And boy did I get it. Ironically, I went to see it with the same girl who accidentally stood me up for LXG (she waited outside the theater, I waited in the lobby). Van Helsuck was my revenge, muahahahahaha!

I got the Van Helsing DVD today. I still love it. The bloopers weren't that good though.
However, the DVD commentary with Richard Roxburgh (I love him!!), Will Kemp and Shuler Hensley is fantastic!!!!! It is so funny and entertaining. I love it!! I think I might go and watch it again. If you have the DVD, I recommend that you watch that commentary, it is great!!

Wow lots of negative reviews on this baby!
I renting it the other night.
First let me say that I was almost freaking raised on the classic monster movies.
As a kid I had cheap plastic Dracula, Frankenstein, WolfMan, Mummy and Creature from the Black Lagoon dolls that I revered as the ultimate toys and played with them endlessly.
Funny, in my fantasy fights the WolfMan was the weakest and always got his butt kicked.

I know have most of those old Creature Feature films on DVD.

That said, now let me review Van Helsing.

The opening with Mr. Hyde was awesome!
The Hulk should have been as good.
Visually everything throughout the movie was stunning.

Now jump to Dr. Frankenstein.
Again: awesome!
Taking it to the Windmill was right out of the old movies.
Frankenstien's Monster himself was different enough and yet the same to be very interesting.

Van Helsing's bumbling helper made me laugh and was great.
The Werewolf parts were incredibly done as well.
They all looked amazing.

The 3 female vampires are right from the old films as well.
And Kate Beckinsale?
Hubba-hubba!

Dracula himself was very well done.
The only thing I really didn't get was Van Helsing himself.
He was an "agent of God"?
And I watched it twice but never understood his connection to creating Dracula.
He took his ring when he killed him the first time?
I didn't get it at all.
Can anyone explain it like you were talking to a ten yearold and fill me in?


Even with that, to me this is the ultimate Monster Movie.

Hmmm, I heard so many bad things about this from people I trust... but perhaps I will give it a look...
thanks for the review...

Usivius wrote:Hmmm, I heard so many bad things about this from people I trust... but perhaps I will give it a look...
thanks for the review...

I forgot about the horse and carriage "race"!
A very good throw back to the old flicks too.
They ALWAYS had those chases.

It was fun, Usivius.
If you're looking for "reality" you might not like it though.

Hurrumph. I rather enjoyed it.

HLT, Back then, the victor took trophies from the loser. Such as a finger... Ordinarily, in big wars they got the camp followers (women who, ah, acted as substitute wives, shall we say?) to go through the battlefield and take valuables (buttons, jewelry, etc...) from the fallen. That's actual history. (Grin, I actually learned stuff yay!) The same counts for smaller battles. Trophies are essential if you want to prove what you've done. Now, most people's jewelry isn't notorious, so fingers, hands, ears, etc are necessary, but I suppose since he's Dracula, a ring would do. (Oh, sure, the finger too, but I think VH did that to be mean. What? Okay, I'm just a bit annoyed at Hugh Jackman.)

Oh, hell, a twenty-yo wouldn't get what I'm saying.

Oh, and Dracula made a deal with the devil to get revenge on VH. Were it not for the whole, VH killing Dracula thing, no devil deal would have been made. Mmmkay?

I loved Karl. "*whispers*" "*gasp* But you can't do that! You are a monk!" "*smug smile* Actually, I'm just a friar." Right on.

Now, if they'd used the Van Helsing werewolves in the third Harry Potter movie, maybe it wouldn't have been so very hokey.