Kevin's Watch

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:26 am**

They crowd the Tower and screech and cause a nuisance, my Brothers of the Illuimed Majesty. How doth to remove the Dark Birds? I ask for the Brothers to ponder a while and to find our answer to the Dark Birds. They are a multitude, and are sure to cause more havoc. Already they lurk in a chamber room and call forth for people to venture in! Can you deny their cry for company? My Brothers, they will never stop!

So far we are four:
The Illuimed Majesty Against The Dark
The Illuimed Majesty of the Tower of London
The Illuimed Brother of the 255 ALTernate Truths
The Illuimed Majesty Against the Eternal Night

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:33 am**

Indeed the birds pester my loft, their calls screech loudly in my ears. Action is of necesity, but when confronted the winged beasts take flight... it is a matter for much illuimed consideration indeed.

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:48 am**

Have the Brothers heard their cries? When an Illuimed Man speaks he speaks Truth. When A Dark Bird cries it is lies or taunts or distortions. And it's excuses are vain attempts to hide the Truth. Are we ignorant to this? NO!
Brothers, there must come a time when these Birds that Peck and Multiply are driven from the Tower! But alas, I suspect they will visit us here, in our Sanctum. Prepare!

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:54 am**

the brotherhoods defence must begin, but the illuimed not show it. Our eyes must hold no malice, our lips must betray no falsness, or the Dark will be forewarned. If our unfortune is met, the illuimed face unknown times for the dark is unpredictable in nature.

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:56 am**

You speak Wisdom, Illuimed Majesty of the Tower of London.

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 3:59 am**

Brace the protective words on thou tongue, brother, we will soon need them.

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 5:46 pm**

Uhh, I'm getting Master Vile and Master Bater confused here.

But, I may be able to help you with your "Dark Bird" problem. You see, all you need to know is what the source of these foul fowl is. Dark Birds......Dartk, as in evil, Bird as in bird-brained. Evil and Bird-brained....Bird-brained and Evil....I GOT IT! A Raven is a dark bird, and is associated with evil all throughout literature. Even an idiot knows this. But, and idiot may not spell Raven correctly; he might spell it R-e-v-a-n. And Darth is evil. THere you have it. Kill Darth Revan, and the birds will go away.

Posted: **Fri Jul 09, 2004 9:58 pm**

BEGONE! This matter should be left for the illuimed brotherhood!

Posted: **Mon Jul 12, 2004 6:11 pm**

What the....!??! How Rude!!

*Slams birdcage door shut*

Posted: **Mon Jul 12, 2004 6:28 pm**

. . . ?

Posted: **Mon Jul 12, 2004 9:00 pm**

dANdeLION wrote:What the....!??! How Rude!!

*Slams birdcage door shut*

Does your avatar speak truth? Are you now one of the illuimed Majesty?

Posted: **Mon Jul 12, 2004 9:03 pm**

What has happened to dAN? I demand that you cease and desist your avatar-mockery, or else!!!!

Posted: **Mon Jul 12, 2004 9:06 pm**

Murrin wrote:. . . ?

ChucklinVlad wrote:What has happened to dAN? I demand that you cease and desist your avatar-mockery, or else!!!!

Unilluimed are not welcome!

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 2:06 am**

I have chosen to be one of the Illuimed of my own free will. This is not some chicanery brought about by my beaked bretheren. I seek not to mock, or be made a mockery. Unless, of course, I were a mocking bird. But that would be just plain unilluimed, which I obviously am not.

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 11:15 am**

Murrin wrote:. . . ?

BEGONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dAN. You have shown promise in deciphering the Words of the Illuimed Majesty. I have every belief that you may do our Cause good. Perhaps if my Brothers of the Illuimed Majesty would induct you? However, this is no easy process. One must know the 255 ALTernate truths, and see the signs of the Dark Birds; what they eat and their sayings. If you can prove this to me and my Brothers, then you may join the Illuimed Ranks.

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 11:16 am**

ChucklinVlad wrote:What has happened to dAN? I demand that you cease and desist your avatar-mockery, or else!!!!

BEGONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 11:33 am**

I have learned the 255 ALTernate Truths, my masters. I also desire not to deprive Shifts.

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 11:38 am**

Welcome, our new brother. And welcome, dANdeLION.

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 12:05 pm**

Thank you! It's so good to join the flock.

Posted: **Tue Jul 13, 2004 12:13 pm**

Ur-Vile wrote:
Murrin wrote:. . . ?
BEGONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dAN. You have shown promise in deciphering the Words of the Illuimed Majesty. I have every belief that you may do our Cause good. Perhaps if my Brothers of the Illuimed Majesty would induct you? However, this is no easy process. One must know the 255 ALTernate truths, and see the signs of the Dark Birds; what they eat and their sayings. If you can prove this to me and my Brothers, then you may join the Illuimed Ranks.

I know of this ALT + 255 truth, but to speak it out loud would cause destruction far beyond anything our mortal ken can cope with.

The Sign of the Dark Bird is thus:

What they eat is not as important as how much they eat; in essence, they eat 3.1415926535 times what a normal, stable lifeform eats.

The saying of the Dark Bird is simply "heh".