Kevin's Watch

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 9:56 pm**

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for attending. I hope you enjoy the show, because what you are about to see I will never attempt again (unless I get really hungry for Arby's).

Man has walked on the moon, created civilization, established lasting monuments of art and architecture. And I will eat a roast beef sandwich. If you are under the age of 18, please turn away.

It began innocently enough. I had already scarfed two roast beef sandwiches, but the hunger--the animal urge--was still wrestling within me. I had to have another. I had to jump head-first into the cornucopia of roast beef and barbecue sauce.

The Despiser and his groveler.

At first I was overwhelmed by the sheer mass of the sandwich.

How does one safely ingest such an obtuse object?

After a Socratic seminar with my minions, we all agreed that the best option would be for me to open the front exhaust port of my face.

I am the Death Star to the roast beef’s Millennium Falcon.

After an arduous five minutes, the sandwich at last entered my cavernous maw. Where it has gone to now is something the philosophers will muse over for centuries untold, I’m sure.

Tomorrow, I will eat raisins.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:15 pm**

Foul,

btw, You look like Michael Ian Black in that last one.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:19 pm**

No, it's not true! Not the guy who always talks on the "I Love the 80s" thing on VH1!

Note: the last picture is older, when I had longer hair. I think I look better with longer hair, but shorter hair is easier to wash. It's like choosing gameplay over graphics, I guess.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:21 pm**

This thread sucks!

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:24 pm**

Yeah, but your avatar is from Last of the Mohicans. Ohhh burnt.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:26 pm**

You're very skinny. Eat more roast beef sandwiches.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:34 pm**

Dude, my belly is going to pop. I'll eat some apple sauce, though.

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:37 pm**

The 2nd picture is priceless

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:47 pm**

Lord Foul wrote:Yeah, but your avatar is from Last of the Mohicans. Ohhh burnt.

Magua eats no sandwich!

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 10:55 pm**

I don't quite know what to say......

Posted: **Tue Jun 21, 2005 11:10 pm**

I think the sandwich won.

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:59 am**

It was really lame until..... "Flawless Victory"
and then the whole thing became one of my favorite posts!!

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 1:06 am**

Yes. Great thread.

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 1:23 am**

High Lord Tolkien wrote:It was really lame until..... "Flawless Victory"

Bah! You didn't even like the Death Star analogy?!

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 1:30 am**

Lord Foul wrote:
High Lord Tolkien wrote:It was really lame until..... "Flawless Victory"
Bah! You didn't even like the Death Star analogy?!

I missed it.
I was too disturbed by you trying to eat that lamp.

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 2:01 am**

Well, hey, I just began eating, you know. It's not unusual to accidentally eat a lamp while trying to eat a sandwich, is it?

Posted: **Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:20 pm**

to the whole thread.

Kevin's Watch

Foul Eats Roast Beef Live!

Foul Eats Roast Beef Live!