Kevin's Watch

One day about three weeks ago, I went to a university society social.

At this social I met a girl who introduced herself as "Fish". The first thing I thought to myself was "What the hell kind of name is Fish?". What I actually said was "What the hell kind of name is Fish?". This probably wasn't the most tactful thing to say, but I'd had quite a bit of vodka punch and wasn't on top form. The outcome was a resounding slap round the face.

I was rendered speechless with shock, I'm used to getting away with derisive comments, and I went to an all boys secondary school, so a slap is the last thing I've learned to expect. Everyone else around seemed stunned as well, there was an uncomfortable silence. Until eventually someone said something like "well, you kind of asked for it", and everyone else seemed to agree. So I walked off to find solace in the punch bowl.

I told a few people what had happened and there seemed to be a pretty much even split between people who thought I deserved the slap and people who thought I didn't. I thought that would be the end of the whole thing, and it seemed like it was.

That is until on friday night, I was in the pub telling the story to someone, and a guy standing behind me suddenly interrupted with "You talking about Fish?" and proceeded to give a pretty accurate description of Fish. It turned out he'd also encountered Fish. He'd been unfortunate enough to engage her in conversation, found out what her name was, laughed at it and been slapped round the face.

Coincidence? I think not.

Don't bother, she sounds like a lesbian.


Seriously, tough call on what to think.
If "Fish" is her true name then she's grown up her whole life hearing what you said and probably has been teased to tears all through childhood.

I've learned that people with the last name of "Smith" or "Jones" usually have to hold back the urge to choke someone when that person "jokingly" asked if they are telling the truth.
I'm told it was amusing the first 100 times they heard it.

I guess she stopped holding back.
Or she's just a bitch.
AND a lesbian.


(I'm kidding. That's a common dumb thing for guys to say to one another after being rejected by a girl.)

What the hell kind of name is 'Fish'?

Y'know, I'm usually pretty big on the whole chivalry thing, but in this kind of situation... I think I would've put her in a headlock and made her admit it was a pretty stupid name... especially for a woman. In the very unlikely event it is her real name, she still has no excuse since she could easily just call herself something else (I've been going by Jack for ten years. Trust me; it's easy).

The vodka punch excuses all you actions.

It's nice to see nobody taking Fish's side!

Had it been Robert Mitchum in your shoes, he would've slapped her back.

I would've said the same thing you did, especially had I been drinking. If she'd slapped me, I probably would've called her something very rude and been slapped again.

At least she didn't mace you. That's no fun, let me tell you....

If it were me, when she tried to slap me, I would have done a quadruple backflip to get out of the way, and then I would have flown through the roof. Literally. There would have been shards of wood shooting off at all angles as I smashed my way through (the roof was made of wood, right? If it wasn't then it should have been because wood looks cool when it splinters). Then, I would have hung in a batman-type pose against the moon, before blowing up the whole building with my laser eyes... err, explosive... laser eyes.

Equal rights, Equal fights.

sue the woman, she emasculated you. that's worth cash dude.

I might have said something else insulting if I hadn't been completely stunned by the unexpectedness of the slap. It was so incredibly unexpected that I didn't even have time to flinch. I was still congratulating myself whilst smirking slightly when the slap hit me full on the face.

A quadruple backflip was completely out of the question (there were tables and chairs right behind me). I suppose I could sue, but I'd feel like a bit of a dick suing some girl called Fish for slapping me round the face.

it's a great story tho'!!

what the hell kind of name is fish. heh.

"Yes, Bernice, it still hurts. No, Jello is fine. Any flavor but lime".

money, tv movie of the week
Slapped by Fish: based on a true story.

The ones that need slapping are those parents who name their children after cold-blooded aquatic vertebrates.

It is even funnier to me because it brings to mind Pythons 'Fish Slapping Dance'.Judging by her reaction perhaps it has something to do personal hygine.

Matrixman wrote:The ones that need slapping are those parents who name their children after cold-blooded aquatic vertebrates.

And the people who make derisive comments about it.

LMAO! That's a pretty funny story Nathan.

--A

It is even funnier to me because it brings to mind Pythons 'Fish Slapping Dance'.

EXACTLY what I was thinking when I saw the title of this thread! That is one of my favourite Python 'bits'. Absolutely hilarious.
Now, as to your story ....