THOOLAH has come to redeem your mortal soul.
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2005 2:10 am
Greetings, my Brothers and Sisters. I have come to spread the almighty word of The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters. For too long we have lived in the shadow of the Linden Avery Support Guild. For countless ages we have quietly sat while the minions of the Queen of Inaction have dominated the discussion here at the Watch. For generations we have awaited patiently for a time when The Chronicles would no longer be plagued by the evil that is Linden Avery. We have waited while the unholy supporters of the Chosen have tried to convince us that Linden Avery really is a worthy successor to the great Thomas Covenant.
Well, to you my Brothers and Sisters, I say to you,
NO MORE!
No more shall we stand to listen to the lies preached by the Linden Avery Support Guild. No more shall we stand to accept a second rate character to continue on as a farce of a main character in the great Chronicles of Thomas Covenant. No more shall we hide our annoyance with the great Queen of Inaction, and her many forsaken qualities. The Chosen is eternally whiney and is forever complainey. She tricks us with pages and pages of endless thought, misjudgment, and a fear of taking action. We require a lead character who isn't afraid to shoot fireballs out of their ass and completely annihilate and destroy every living thing within a thirty mile radius in order to accomplish their goal, whatever it may or may not be. We require a lead character who leaps before they look, and who acts immediately in every situation, without even taking a nanosecond to consider the possibilities. The time for action has come! No more shall we sit around and "think" about what is going on! For the Way of Thought is the Way of Inaction, which is mandate of the unholy queen.
Now, my Brothers and Sisters, I am aware that many of you have fallen from the light. You have grown weak and have submitted yourselves to the foul teachings of the Linden Avery Support Guild. You have allowed yourselves to accept the fact that Linden Avery has been chosen to lead the story of the Chronicles, and there is nothing we can do to stop her reign of terror. You have given up hope that nothing can be done to save our mortal spirits. You have allowed yourselves to consider thinking the ultimate sin of proclamation: "Well, Linden Avery isn't too bad..."
But all is not lost, my Brothers and Sisters! For The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters is here to back into the holy light. THOOLAH forgives you of your sins! We must join together and proclaim to all of the Watch our annoyance with the Queen of Inaction! We must organize to be One Body, and One Unified Voice, for this is the only way we may combat the evil that is the Linden Avery Support Guild. They may try to trick us and tell us that she is not that bad, but we will always know of the evils of the Queen of Inaction. We must remain strong in the face of Averyness!
I ask you, my Brothers and Sisters, to look within your hearts, and you will see the truth that is THOOLAH. If you feel confused and conflicted by what you have been told by the Linden Avery Support Guild, then speak to us, my Brothers and Sisters, and we will help you find the Way of Action, Way of Truth, and the Way of THOOLAH.
The Holy Creed of The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters:
We shall denounce the many lies of the Linden Avery Support Guild
We shall be forever annoyed with the unholy ways of the Queen of Inaction
We shall be forever peeved with her tendency to over-analyze and whine until the cows come home
We shall await a time when then Chosen finally stops thinking and actually does something
Amen, my Brothers and Sisters. Our time has come.-jay
Well, to you my Brothers and Sisters, I say to you,
NO MORE!
No more shall we stand to listen to the lies preached by the Linden Avery Support Guild. No more shall we stand to accept a second rate character to continue on as a farce of a main character in the great Chronicles of Thomas Covenant. No more shall we hide our annoyance with the great Queen of Inaction, and her many forsaken qualities. The Chosen is eternally whiney and is forever complainey. She tricks us with pages and pages of endless thought, misjudgment, and a fear of taking action. We require a lead character who isn't afraid to shoot fireballs out of their ass and completely annihilate and destroy every living thing within a thirty mile radius in order to accomplish their goal, whatever it may or may not be. We require a lead character who leaps before they look, and who acts immediately in every situation, without even taking a nanosecond to consider the possibilities. The time for action has come! No more shall we sit around and "think" about what is going on! For the Way of Thought is the Way of Inaction, which is mandate of the unholy queen.
Now, my Brothers and Sisters, I am aware that many of you have fallen from the light. You have grown weak and have submitted yourselves to the foul teachings of the Linden Avery Support Guild. You have allowed yourselves to accept the fact that Linden Avery has been chosen to lead the story of the Chronicles, and there is nothing we can do to stop her reign of terror. You have given up hope that nothing can be done to save our mortal spirits. You have allowed yourselves to consider thinking the ultimate sin of proclamation: "Well, Linden Avery isn't too bad..."
But all is not lost, my Brothers and Sisters! For The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters is here to back into the holy light. THOOLAH forgives you of your sins! We must join together and proclaim to all of the Watch our annoyance with the Queen of Inaction! We must organize to be One Body, and One Unified Voice, for this is the only way we may combat the evil that is the Linden Avery Support Guild. They may try to trick us and tell us that she is not that bad, but we will always know of the evils of the Queen of Inaction. We must remain strong in the face of Averyness!
I ask you, my Brothers and Sisters, to look within your hearts, and you will see the truth that is THOOLAH. If you feel confused and conflicted by what you have been told by the Linden Avery Support Guild, then speak to us, my Brothers and Sisters, and we will help you find the Way of Action, Way of Truth, and the Way of THOOLAH.
The Holy Creed of The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters:
We shall denounce the many lies of the Linden Avery Support Guild
We shall be forever annoyed with the unholy ways of the Queen of Inaction
We shall be forever peeved with her tendency to over-analyze and whine until the cows come home
We shall await a time when then Chosen finally stops thinking and actually does something
Amen, my Brothers and Sisters. Our time has come.-jay
