Kevin's Watch

Alphabetical, but can be wacky or serious wishes. I'll start:



I wish that: Advertisements paid me to listen to them.

I wish that: Boogers were worth as much as gold or diamonds. Don't you?

Yes, but then think of the aftermarket for kleenex.... yeck!

I wish that: Covenant's next book come out...

I wish that: Dogs and Cats would rise up and take over this accursed planet and force the humans to make monolithic monuments that would tower thousands of feet into the sky bearing the name of each great Dog or Cat ruler which would last for centuries (or decades depending on dog years).

I wish that: Egg yolks were unpredictably rainbow-colored instead of plain yellow. Breakfast would be so much prettier, then.

I wish that: Floating cities dotted the skies above our world though I wouldn't want to live directly below one when they flushed their sewage system.

I wish that God would prove once and for all whether he exists or not.

(But then again, if he did not exist, how can he prove it?)

I wish hairballs would quit coming out of my cat.

I wish that I could teach the world to sing in perfect harmony without having to support the Coca-Cola company.

I wish that Jacksonville had made it to the Superbowl.

I wish that Kevin hadn't wasted the Land.

I wish that the Landwasters first name had been something more exotic like Thundercrunch.

I wish that the moon were made out of cheese, so we could feed all the hungry people by blasting them off the planet. Win win, in my book.

I wish that Nobody in the world liked the Cranberries and I wouldn't have to listen to them screech and moan ever again.

I wish that Offices would cease to exist; because they're awful to work in.

I wish that Power Rangers could be removed from the collective human consciousness.

I wish that Queens did not exist. There is no need for them anymore.

I wish that razor wire didn't hurt so much.

I wish that Sadistic people didn't exist.

I wish that Toast was an entre.