In response to questions from Morn, Mikka informs her that Nick wants to be sure she's not presently suffering any lingering effects of Gap sickness. Mikka also tells Morn that Vector was able to get the ship's gap drive working for one more time, now putting them at just two days at space-normal speed to reach Enablement Station in forbidden space.Sitting in a chair near the door, Mikka appeared as ungiving as the bulkhead behind her. She held her arms folded under her breast; her posture was rigid, as if she'd locked down all her joints. Yet an emotion which might have been hostility or need darkened her eyes.
Mikka emphasizes to Morn that they will need to decelerate soon, or else the amnion will consider their approach a hostile attack and vaporize Captain's Fancy. After stating the ship has been to Enablement before, Mikka advises Morn to remember that the challenge with dealing with Amnion isn't in approaching them, but in making sure payment is made so to escape them. To Morn's surprise, Mikka admits to Nick double-dealing with the United Mining Companies Police, getting the UMCP to pay him while he would still find ways to chest them.
Morn takes the risk of telling Mikka that Angus gave her a zone implant that she continues to use. Mikka stands up in stunned amazement, then returns to her seat with a grunt. She then sighs and says while looking at Morn that's it's relief to know Morn isn't some superhuman, after all. Morn wants to know if Mikka will tell Nick, and Mikka emphatically states it's for Nick to find out. She adds that if Nick doesn't know the difference between real and artificial passion, that's his problem."Nick is waiting for you." Morn's tone [to Mikka] was carefully neutral, unchallenging. "You're supposed to make sure I'm all right--and under control--so he can start deceleration. There isn't much time left. Why are you telling me all this?"
Mikka didn't hesitate. Her hostility and her need came to the same thing. Stiffly, she replied, "I want you to trust me."
Morn raised her eyebrows, Trust you? Nick's second? She stared mutely at the woman and waited.
After a moment Mikka explained as if she were taking a personal risk, "I want you to tell me how you do it."
The dryness had come back into Morn's throat. Her voice caught as she asked, "Do what?"
"All of it," Mikka retorted. She seemed to hold herself rigid so that she wouldn't pace violently or pound the walls. Perhaps it was her fear of the Amnion that made her so vulnerable. "The whole thing. How your survived Angus Thermopyle. How you got away from him. How you're able to go for weeks without rest, and carry a workload that would kill a cyborg on permanent stim until you look like an animated null-wave transmitter, and still solve a problem that the best of us have been beating our brains out over. How you make Nick--" For an instant, she faltered. Her jaws clenched. But then she tightened her self-command. "How you make him need you.
"He's never done anything like this before. He's perverse, all right--but not for women. He doesn't fuck women he trusts. Of he start to trust one, he stops fucking her and finds somebody else. Or if he starts fucking one, he stops trusting her. Or he just gets bored.
"You've done something to him. None of us recognize him. Half of us are in shock. The rest are so scared we're shitting in our suits. I would have staked my life that he would never risk himself like this--or his ship--for any woman. He as sure as hell didn't do it for me, the last time we were here. But you've got him doing it. Just so you can have a baby.
"I want to know how."
The bile in Mikka's voice was as thick as nausea. Facing her, Morn answered softly, "What makes you think I've got a choice? If I did everything else I would be dead by now."
A scowl like a spasm twisted Mikka's features. "Listen to me, Morn." By an act of will, she kept herself still. "Until you came along, I was the most competent woman I've ever met. If you don't count Nick and one or tow other men, I was the most competent person I know. I can run every station on this ship. If I have to, I can run them for days. If Captain's Fancy fell apart. I could weld her back together from cord to skin. I know to the hour how long our scrubber pads will last, or our food. I can handle anybody aboard except Nick in a fair fight. I'm good with guns." Grimly refusing to falter again, she said, "In bed I've got the stamina of a sex addict. My hips are too big, but I've got good breasts and great muscle tone. Nick dropped me when he started trusting me--but at least I know he trusts me.
"And you make me look like a gap-eyed starlet in a bad video."
Deliberately setting aside her defenses, Mikka said, "I need to understand you. Otherwise I'm finished."
Morn could have responded, As soon as I explain it, I'm finished. But instinctively she knew that wasn't true: not at this moment, when Mikka had chosen to expose so much of herself. And Morn had been alone for too long: she had told too many lies, suffered too many losses. Like her visitor, she needed to set aside her defenses--if only for a moment with an honest enemy.
I feel some relief that Morn will confide in Mikka, who seems likeable despite being threatening. She bravely admits Morn baffles her, and Morn chooses honesty over lies, therefore making it easier for me to admire both characters and thus care about more about what happens to them.
[more to come]