Food Songs!

[Cail]

That would be Kip Addotta. Saw the video to it once in 1986, and I've been laughing about it ever since.

[Menolly]

Oh geez, looks like I kicked off a Weird Al sub-thread...

[The Laughing Man]

• Scenes From An Italian Restaurant
  
  A bottle of white, a bottle of red
  Perhaps a bottle of rose instead
  We'll get a table near the street
  In our old familiar place
  You and I - face to face
  A bottle of red, a bottle of white
  It all depends upon your appetite
  I'll meet you any time you want
  In our Italian Restaurant.
  
  Things are okay with me these days
  Got a good job, got a good office
  I got a new wife, got a new life
  And the family is fine
  We lost touch long ago
  You lost weight I did not know
  You could ever look so nice after so much time.
  
  Do you remember those days hanging out at the village green?
  Engineer boots, leather jackets and tight blue jeans
  Oh, you drop a dime in the box play the song about New Orleans
  Cold beer, hot lights, my sweet romantic teenage nights
  
  Brenda and Eddie were the popular steadies
  And the king and the queen of the prom
  Riding around with the car top down and the radio on
  Nobody looked any finer
  Or was more of a hit at the Parkway Diner
  We never knew we could want more than that out of life
  Surely Brenda and Eddie would always know how to survive.
  
  Brenda and Eddie were still going steady in the summer of '75
  When they decided the marriage would be at the end of July
  Everyone said they were crazy
  "Brenda you know that you're much too lazy
  and Eddie could never afford to live that kind of life."
  Oh, but there we were wavin' Brenda and Eddie goodbye.
  
  Well they got an apartment with deep pile carpets
  And a couple of paintings from Sears
  A big waterbed that they bought with the bread
  They had saved for a couple of years
  They started to fight when the money got tight
  And they just didn't count on the tears.
  
  And Rock and Roll!
  
  Well, they lived for a while in a very nice style
  But it's always the same in the end
  They got a divorce as a matter of course
  And they parted the closest of friends
  Then the king and the queen went back to the green
  But you could never go back there again.
  
  Brenda and Eddie had it already by the summer of '75
  From the high to the low to the end of the show
  For the rest of their lives
  They couldn't go back to the greasers
  The best they could do was pick up the pieces
  We always knew they would both find a way to get by
  That's all I heard about Brenda and Eddie
  Can't tell you more 'cause I've told you already
  And here we are wavin' Brenda and Eddie goodbye.
  
  A bottle of red, a bottle of white
  Whatever kind of mood you're in tonight
  I'll meet you anytime you want
  In our Italian Restaurant.

I just want to say that chicken parm rocks!

[lucimay]

here's my favorite food song for sure.


Wish I was a Kellogg's Cornflake
Floatin' in my bowl takin' movies,
Relaxin' awhile, livin' in style,
Talkin' to a raisin who 'casion'ly plays L.A.,
Casually glancing at his toupee.

Wish I was an English muffin
'Bout to make the most out of a toaster.

I'd ease myself down,
Comin' up brown.

I prefer boysenberry
More than any ordinary jam.
I'm a "Citizens for Boysenberry Jam" fan.

Ah, South California.

If I become a first lieutenant
Would you put my photo on your piano?
To Maryjane--
Best wishes, Martin.
(Old Roger draft-dodger
Leavin' by the basement door),
Everybody knows what he's
Tippy-toeing down there for

[onewyteduck]

Chocolate on my fingers,
icing on my lips,
sugar diabetes, and blubber on my hips.
I keep the nightlight burning
in the kitchen, baby
so I can go downstaris and cruise.
I got them Oreo cream sandwich
chocolate covered cream filled blues.

I hide 'em in the cabinet,
I keep 'em in a jar
for emergencies you know.
I keep 'em in the glove compartment
of my car.
And I can't live without 'em
they get me higher than i can get on booze.
I got them Oreo cream sandwich
chocolate covered cream filled blues.

Doctor says I'm crazy.
You better give 'em up and quick.
You'll be pushing up daisies
because boy you're deathly sick.
I could quit if I wanted to
but I don't want to lose
them Oreo cream sandwich
chocolate coverd cream filled cookie
built by Nabisco, ain't no rookie
next best thing to nookie blues!

[Hound Of Chulainn]

Pretty much every song from Viva! La Woman by Cibo Matto would count, but most notably:

Cibo Matto - Birthday Cake

Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet

Yes, I'm cooking for my son and his wife
It's his 30th birthday
Pour berries into my bowl
Add milk of two months ago
"It's moldy mom, isn't it?"
I don't give a flying f**k though

Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet!

It's food nouveau
It's food nouveau
It's the shape of love
Beat it! Beat it up!
Beat it! Beat it up!

Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG
Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG

Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet!

You were born in the 60's
We made a war with the Vietnamese
We loved LSD, we died easily
Can we just say c'est la vie?
So what! Say what! For your own sake
Do you have a headache or heartbreak?
Are you made or broken by the birthday cake?
You may be slow on the uptake
I pour pot in the birthday cake
So what! Say what! For my own sake
Watch out yo! Here I come yo!
I'm gonna change to a rattlesnake
Turn up the TV! Do you agree?
Yeah, I'm talking turkey Take it from me
I'm gonna show my love for my dove
"But it's moldy, mom, isn't it?"

Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG
Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG

Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and eat!
You know my love is very sweet!

[lucimay]

buy me a corndawg and put ketchup on it

do this for me and i'll be your friend

oh i luv them corndawgs i love them i do

so buy meeeeeeee a corndawwwwwwwwg and get you one too.

[lucimay]

Make my bed out of Wonder Bread
Spread some mustard upon my head
I don't want no onions or sauerkraut, Mamma
Hold on to the bun baby, work it on out.

I'm a chili dog
I guess you guessed by now
Sure 'nuf I'm a chili dog, baby (you and me)
Delicious!

Don't get jealous
Better not up and get over zealous (watch out now y'all).
Come on now fellas,
Pass me down the relish.

Don't read no Ann Landers
Just can't feed me no Colonel Sanders
I ain't trying to fool us
Don't bring home no Orange Julius.

Gotta have--one more time--get on down again
Woh, woh, chili dog, baby
Yes indeed, I want a chili dog, yeh
Talkin' about stone delicious
Good for you too!

[Infelice]

On top of spaghetti,
All covered with cheese,
I lost my poor meatball,
When somebody sneezed.

It rolled off the table,
And on to the floor,
And then my poor meatball,
Rolled out of the door.

It rolled in the garden,
And under a bush,
And then my poor meatball,
Was nothing but mush.

The mush was as tasty
As tasty could be,
And then the next summer,
It grew into a tree.

The tree was all covered,
All covered with moss,
And on it grew meatballs,
And tomato sauce.

So if you eat spaghetti,
All covered with cheese,
Hold on to your meatball,
Whenever you sneeze.

And then there is......

Oh-me, oh-my, oh-you
Whatever shall I do
Hallelujah, the question is peculiar
I'd give a lot of dough
If only I could know
The answer to my question
Is it yes or is it no

Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight
If your mother says don't chew it
Do you swallow it in spite
Can you catch it on your tonsils
Can you heave it left and right
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight

Here comes a blushing bride
The groom is by her side
Up to the altar
Just as steady as Gibraltar
Why, the groom has got the ring
And it's such a pretty thing
But as he slips it on her finger
The choir begins to sing

Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight
If your mother says don't chew it
Do you swallow it in spite
Can you catch it on your tonsils
Can you heave it left and right
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight

Now the nation rise is one
To send their only son
Up to the White House
Yes, the nation's only White House
To voice their discontent
Unto the Pres-I-dent
They pawn the burning question
What has swept this continent

[Lonnie speaks:]
If tin whistles are made of tin
What do they make fog horns out of
Boom, boom

Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight
If your mother says don't chew it
Do you swallow it in spite
Can you catch it on your tonsils
Can you heave it left and right
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight

On the bedpost overnight

[Man:]
Hello there, I love you and the one who holds you tight

[Lonnie:]
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday
Thursday, Friday, Sat'day night

On the bedpost overnight

[Man:]
A dollar is a dollar and a dime is a dime

[Lonnie:]
He's singin' out the chorus
But he hasn't got the time

On the bedpost overnight, yeah

Not totally food related but close enough.


Dont think anyone has mentioned.....

"Eat It"

How come you're always such a fussy young man
Don't want no Captain Crunch, don't want no Raison Bran
Well, don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan
So eat it, just eat it

Don't want to argue, I don't want to debate
Don't want to hear about what kind of food you hate
You won't get no dessert 'till you clean off your plate
So eat it

Don't you tell me you're full
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesn't matter if it's boiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it, ooh

Your table manners are some cryin' shame
You're playin' with your food, this ain't some kind of game
Now, if you starve to death, you'll just have yourself to blame
So eat it, just eat it

You better listen, better do what you're told
You haven't even touched your tuna casserole
You better chow down or it's gonna get cold
So eat it

I don't care if you're full
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Open up your mouth and feed it
Have some more yogurt, have some more spam
It doesn't matter it it's fresh or canned
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Don't you make me repeat it
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesn't matter what you had for lunch
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
If it's gettin' cold, reheat it
Have a big dinner, have a light snack
If you don't like it, you can't send it back
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it (oh lord)
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesn't matter if it's boiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Don't you make me repeat it (oh no)
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesn't matter what you had for lunch
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

[danlo]

Hey Cail! Is Kip Addotta the same guy that did "Wet Dreams"? That song is priceless. I know I shouldn't but, cause it's unrelated, but I'll try to find it and post...

[danlo]

..yup same guy! "Dreams" is one of the top 20 "Dr. Demento" songs of all time...(it's weird he sounds like Robbie Robertson when he sings this)


It was April the forty-first
Being a quadruple leap year
I was driving in downtown Atlantis
My barracuda was in the shop
So I was in a rented stingray
And it was overheating

So I pulled into a Shell Station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"

While they were doing that
I walked over to a place called the Oyster Bar, a real dive
But I knew the owner
He used to play for the Dolphins
I said "Hi Gil"
You have to yell, he's hard of herring

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Gil was also down on his luck
Fact is he was barely keeping his head below water
I bellied up to the sandbar
He poured me the usual

Rusty snail, hold the grunion
Shaken not stirred
With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side
Heavy on the mako

I slipped him a fin
On porpoise
I was feeling good
I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids
For the halibut

Well the place was crowded
We were packed in like sardines They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal
What sole

Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna
Salmon Chanted Evening
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers
Probably there to see the bass player

One of them was this cute little yellowtail
And she's giving me the eye
So I figured this is my chance for a little fun
You know, piece of Pisces

But she said things I just couldn't fathom
She was too deep, seemed to be under a lot of pressure
Boy, could she drink
She drank like a . . .
She drank a lot

I said "What's your sign"
She said "Aquarium"
I said "Great, let's get tanked"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

I invited her to my place for a midnight bait
I said "Come on baby, it'll only take a few minnows"
She threw me that same old line
"Not tonight, I gotta haddock"

And she wasn't kidding either
Cause in came the biggest, meanest looking haddock
I'd ever seen come down the pike
He was covered with mussels

He came over to me and said
"Listen, shrimp, don't you come trollin' around here"
What a crab
This guy was steamed
I could see the anchor in his eyes

I turned to him, I said
"A-balone, you're just being shellfish"
Well, I knew it was going to be trouble and so did Gil
‘Cause he was already on the phone to the cods

The haddock hits me with a sucker punch
I catch him with a left hook
He eels over
It was a fluke but there he was
Lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel
Kelpless

I said "Forget the cods Gil
This guy's gonna need a sturgeon"
Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend
She came over to me, she said
"Hey, big boy, you're really a game fish
What's your name"
I said "Marlin"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Well, from then on we had a whale of a time
I took her to dinner, I took her to dance
I bought her a bouquet of flounders
And then I went home with her
And what did I get for my trouble
A case of the clams

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh