Top 10 Ways To Destroy Earth

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Which method do you prefer?

10: Total Existence Failure
5
36%
9: Gobbled up by Strangelets
1
7%
8: Sucked into a Microscopic Black Hole
1
7%
7: Blown Up by Matter/Anti-matter Reaction
2
14%
6: Destroyed by Vacuum Energy Detonation
0
No votes
5: Sucked into a Giant Black Hole
1
7%
4: Meticulously and Systematically Deconstructed
2
14%
3: Pulverised by Impact with Blunt Instrument
2
14%
2: Eaten by von Neumann Machines
0
No votes
 
Total votes: 14
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Trapper
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Top 10 Ways To Destroy Earth

Post by Trapper »

www.livescience.com/technology/destroy_earth_mp.html
This is not a guide for those whose aim is merely to wipe out humanity. I can in no way guarantee the complete extinction of the human race via any of these methods, real or imaginary. Humanity is wily and resourceful, and many of the methods outlined inside will take many years to even become available, let alone implement, by which time mankind may well have spread to other planets; indeed, other star systems.

If total human genocide is your ultimate goal, you are reading the wrong document. There are far more efficient ways of doing this, many which are available and feasible right now. Nor is this a guide for those wanting to annihilate everything from single-celled life upwards, render Earth uninhabitable or simply conquer it. These are trivial goals in comparison.

This is a guide for those who do not want the Earth to be there anymore.

nb There seems to be a 9 item limit to the poll. #1 is "Hurled into the Sun", but that's pretty boring dontcha think?

I think I like the simple elegance of #3.

:twisted:
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Post by aTOMiC »

I'm liking choice 10 just as long as it happens in the blink of an eye without any previous warning. I'd hate to fret about it. :-)
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Post by Queeaqueg »

I would rathar none of them happened. If I want the Earth to be destroyed, I would like to do it myself.

Is there a chance of those things happening. The only one I have heard of is being sucked into a black-hole but the programme I was watching said that it was highly unlikely and I should not start getting out the tablets.
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Post by I'm Murrin »

The original list is bigger and better.
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Post by DukkhaWaynhim »

I vote for #1, simply because I seem not to be allowed to. My mom always warned me against sunburn anyway.

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Post by lucimay »

Meticulously and Systematically Deconstructed By Grammar Nazis :hide:
you're more advanced than a cockroach,
have you ever tried explaining yourself
to one of them?
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Post by Warmark »

Whats the differenece between a gaint and microscopic black hole?
But if you're all about the destination, then take a fucking flight.
We're going nowhere slowly, but we're seeing all the sights.
And we're definitely going to hell, but we'll have all the best stories to tell.


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Post by DukkhaWaynhim »

One sucks the world in.

One does the same while also accomplishing an impressive trash-compactor effect.

It's a matter of style points, I suppose.

DW
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Post by I'm Murrin »

One involves finding an existing black hole and bringing it and earth closer together. The other involves creating a tiny black hole in a lab on earth.
(Read the full list. Methods and explanations for everything.)
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Post by sgt.null »

i voted for the matter/anti-matter.
but i would prefer zombies eating everyone.
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Post by Queeaqueg »

Oh, I have missed the point again. i thought this was about natural stuff, not methods we can use. still, I rather the Earth wasn't destroyed yet... I have a few things to do first.
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Post by Sandgorgon rider »

The Earth is just a dream I am having. To destroy it just wake me up.
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Post by sgt.null »

i thought you are were a story I wrote?
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Post by DukkhaWaynhim »

we are all figments of our own imagination.... except Lord Foul, who is still trapped in the Arch of Time, right?

DW
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Post by Trapper »

From the original list (as mentioned by Murrin):

Current Earth-Destruction Status
Number of times the Earth has been destroyed: 0
Information courtesy of the International Earth-Destruction Advisory Board

I will update this status report whenever necessary. :P

Queeaqueg wrote:If I want the Earth to be destroyed, I would like to do it myself.
Personally I have no idea what most of the thingamabobs at hardware stores do, but I admire your DIY, can-do attitude Quee.
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Post by Phantasm »

I'd rather the Vogons destroyed Earth. (without the poetry)
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Post by A Gunslinger »

I vote for total existance failure...this way I can turn to my wife and smugly say...I told you so!
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Post by Alynna Lis Eachann »

Murrin wrote:The other involves creating a tiny black hole in a lab on earth.
And you know what's scary? There are people saying that the newest particle collider that's about to open is going to be powerful enough to possibly create miniature black holes. So, um, once they're created, how do we stop them? I mean, don't they just feed on whatever's around and get bigger, or, since they're so tiny, there's going to be stuff that can escape their pull? But if they're still feeding off the tiny stuff, aren't they eventually gonna get big enough to pull in the big stuff anyway?

Man, I wish I understood physics better.

BTW, I'm gonna go with Total Existence Failure, because that just sounds fascinating from a "I'm in a lab on another planet watching it happen from a distance" view.
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Post by balon! »

No violent robot takeover?
Avatar wrote:But then, the answers provided by your imagination are not only sometimes best, but have the added advantage of being unable to be wrong.
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Post by I'm Murrin »

Alynna Lis Eachann wrote: And you know what's scary? There are people saying that the newest particle collider that's about to open is going to be powerful enough to possibly create miniature black holes. So, um, once they're created, how do we stop them? I mean, don't they just feed on whatever's around and get bigger, or, since they're so tiny, there's going to be stuff that can escape their pull? But if they're still feeding off the tiny stuff, aren't they eventually gonna get big enough to pull in the big stuff anyway?

Man, I wish I understood physics better.
Hawking radiation. They're so small, they radiate all their mass very quickly, dissipating within miliseconds.
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