
How do you feel today?
Moderator: Orlion
- dANdeLION
- Lord
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Tired. Got to bed at midnight, woke up at 4 and couldn't get back to sleep. I blame the dreams; fortunately I rarely have them.
Dandelion don't tell no lies
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion
I'm afraid there's no denying
I'm just a dandelion
a fate I don't deserve.
High priest of THOOOTP
*
* This post carries Jay's seal of approval
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion
I'm afraid there's no denying
I'm just a dandelion
a fate I don't deserve.
High priest of THOOOTP

* This post carries Jay's seal of approval
- A Gunslinger
- The Gap Into Spam
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- Loredoctor
- Lord
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- dANdeLION
- Lord
- Posts: 23836
- Joined: Thu Sep 11, 2003 3:22 am
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Just be careful not to set it up to see Uranus.
Dandelion don't tell no lies
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion
I'm afraid there's no denying
I'm just a dandelion
a fate I don't deserve.
High priest of THOOOTP
*
* This post carries Jay's seal of approval
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion
I'm afraid there's no denying
I'm just a dandelion
a fate I don't deserve.
High priest of THOOOTP

* This post carries Jay's seal of approval
- Worm of Despite
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- Loredoctor
- Lord
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- Worm of Despite
- Lord
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"Breathless Boston Creme"? Boston Creme donuts are the most perfect food ever created in this universe or any other.
I now must try this ice creme. For now, it is the sole purpose in my life.
I now must try this ice creme. For now, it is the sole purpose in my life.
"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." - PJ O'Rourke
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"Men and women range themselves into three classes or orders of intelligence; you can tell the lowest class by their habit of always talking about persons; the next by the fact that their habit is always to converse about things; the highest by their preference for the discussion of ideas." - Charles Stewart
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"I believe there are more instances of the abridgment of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." - James Madison
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"Men and women range themselves into three classes or orders of intelligence; you can tell the lowest class by their habit of always talking about persons; the next by the fact that their habit is always to converse about things; the highest by their preference for the discussion of ideas." - Charles Stewart
_____________
"I believe there are more instances of the abridgment of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." - James Madison
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- The Laughing Man
- The Gap Into Spam
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- Sunbaneglasses
- The Gap Into Spam
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I am a mess and here is my story:
I once dated a girl, we will call her Jill. Jill and I had dated for 3 and a half years, we were very happy so one day we entered into a verbal agreement to get married. One day a few months after we got engaged Jill began to feel numbness in her hands and feet, this numbness spread up her arms and legs
so she went to the doctor. While at the doctors office she tried to stand and could not walk, after quite a few tests the doctor pronounced that Jill had guillain barre syndrome, an autoimmune disorder where for no good reason your body attacks its own nerves. By the time Jill arrived at UAB medical center in Birmingham she was completely paralyzed and having trouble breathing on her own. Jill spent a month and a half in ICU on a respirator. After about a month she began to recover, the recovery was the reverse of the onset, first she could feel and move a finger or a toe, then her hand. Jill moved to a rehab facility after her month and a half ICU stay and after a few weeks there she went home in a wheelchair.
Things were normal for a while, but I soon began to realize that she had been changed by her experience. To make an even longer story short about four or five months after she got out of the hospital (by now she was walking, although far from recoved) we went to play tennis one day, something prescribed as part of her rehab. When we got back to my house she took off her engagement ring, put it in my hand, said " Paul, I don't think I love you anymore" got in her car and left.
I was devastated, and I coped by shutting down the "give a shit" center of my brain for a couple of years.
Here is what has me in a mess:
A couple of weeks ago my mom told me that someone had told her that Jill was in UAB hospital with Luekemia. After agonizing over it for a couple of days I called Jills mother, she gave me the lowdown and said " Jill would love to see you", she then gave me Jills room number and the phone number to the room. I called, we talked, the first thing she said to me was " I have always felt shitty about the way I did you, we went through a lot together", then she asked if my wife and I would come see her. We had planned to go on Wednsday but her mother called and said that her immune system was too weak so she could not have visitors.
The truth is I still feel for Jill in a way that I am ashamed of considering we are both now married. I am torn up over this, she is very sick and I am afraid she may die before I get a chance to tell her face to face that I do not hate her for what happened. What I really want to tell her is that although the love of your life is not always the person you end up with, that she was the love of my life and I would also like to thank her for the time that we had together.
Truth is, I can not say these things, but I wish I could. The other truth is that although we are both different people now and we have both done things that we are proud of and ashamed there will always be a special place in my heart occupied by that 18 year old girl I fell in love with 14 years ago.
I once dated a girl, we will call her Jill. Jill and I had dated for 3 and a half years, we were very happy so one day we entered into a verbal agreement to get married. One day a few months after we got engaged Jill began to feel numbness in her hands and feet, this numbness spread up her arms and legs
so she went to the doctor. While at the doctors office she tried to stand and could not walk, after quite a few tests the doctor pronounced that Jill had guillain barre syndrome, an autoimmune disorder where for no good reason your body attacks its own nerves. By the time Jill arrived at UAB medical center in Birmingham she was completely paralyzed and having trouble breathing on her own. Jill spent a month and a half in ICU on a respirator. After about a month she began to recover, the recovery was the reverse of the onset, first she could feel and move a finger or a toe, then her hand. Jill moved to a rehab facility after her month and a half ICU stay and after a few weeks there she went home in a wheelchair.
Things were normal for a while, but I soon began to realize that she had been changed by her experience. To make an even longer story short about four or five months after she got out of the hospital (by now she was walking, although far from recoved) we went to play tennis one day, something prescribed as part of her rehab. When we got back to my house she took off her engagement ring, put it in my hand, said " Paul, I don't think I love you anymore" got in her car and left.
I was devastated, and I coped by shutting down the "give a shit" center of my brain for a couple of years.
Here is what has me in a mess:
A couple of weeks ago my mom told me that someone had told her that Jill was in UAB hospital with Luekemia. After agonizing over it for a couple of days I called Jills mother, she gave me the lowdown and said " Jill would love to see you", she then gave me Jills room number and the phone number to the room. I called, we talked, the first thing she said to me was " I have always felt shitty about the way I did you, we went through a lot together", then she asked if my wife and I would come see her. We had planned to go on Wednsday but her mother called and said that her immune system was too weak so she could not have visitors.
The truth is I still feel for Jill in a way that I am ashamed of considering we are both now married. I am torn up over this, she is very sick and I am afraid she may die before I get a chance to tell her face to face that I do not hate her for what happened. What I really want to tell her is that although the love of your life is not always the person you end up with, that she was the love of my life and I would also like to thank her for the time that we had together.
Truth is, I can not say these things, but I wish I could. The other truth is that although we are both different people now and we have both done things that we are proud of and ashamed there will always be a special place in my heart occupied by that 18 year old girl I fell in love with 14 years ago.
- Loredoctor
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I don't know what to say, Sunbaneglasses. I worry that words aren't enough. You have my email address if you need someone to chat to.
Anyway, what i think is that you should ask yourself that say the worst happens, and you don't tell her; how would you feel. But how would feel about your wife now? It's a tough dilemma. Perhaps just sit back and think about it for a while and then act on it once you have done that.
I wish I could offer better advice, my friend.
Anyway, what i think is that you should ask yourself that say the worst happens, and you don't tell her; how would you feel. But how would feel about your wife now? It's a tough dilemma. Perhaps just sit back and think about it for a while and then act on it once you have done that.
I wish I could offer better advice, my friend.
Waddley wrote:your Highness Sir Dr. Loredoctor, PhD, Esq, the Magnificent, First of his name, Second Cousin of Dragons, White-Gold-Plate Wielder!
SBG, you shouldn't feel bad you still hold this woman in your heart. Just because you have a wife doesn't mean you can't have special places in your heart for other people.
As for what you do: I don't know. I'm not sure whether telling her she was the love of your life would be the best thing to do (only because, being as unwell as she is, that might stir up emotions she's unable to deal with at the moment). HOWEVER, telling her that there will always be a place in your heart for her, thanking her for the time that you spent together, telling her how much that time meant to you, will probably be of great solace to her. And there's nothing wrong with saying those things.
As for what you do: I don't know. I'm not sure whether telling her she was the love of your life would be the best thing to do (only because, being as unwell as she is, that might stir up emotions she's unable to deal with at the moment). HOWEVER, telling her that there will always be a place in your heart for her, thanking her for the time that you spent together, telling her how much that time meant to you, will probably be of great solace to her. And there's nothing wrong with saying those things.

- Menolly
- A Lowly Harper
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SBG...can you expand upon what you did here, and write her a letter expressing all of your thoughts and feelings? You do not have to ever give it to her, but should the day ever arise where you decide to do so, it's already written.
If you have another talent you could use instead, music, poetry, painting, what have you, use that medium instead of a letter.
And you would have sent your thoughts out to the cosmos and not kept them bottled up inside where they would do the most damage.
If you have another talent you could use instead, music, poetry, painting, what have you, use that medium instead of a letter.
And you would have sent your thoughts out to the cosmos and not kept them bottled up inside where they would do the most damage.

- Sunbaneglasses
- The Gap Into Spam
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Spilling my guts on KW has actually made me feel much better. So long as going in there and seeing her sick and in a hospital bed again does not cause some sort of PTSD episode I believe I can face seeing her without having some sort of breakdown. It's really not fair to have to go through as much as she has gone through with her health, and I guess it is pretty selfish for me to be agonizing over my emotional issues.