Win Wayfriend's Money

[Cameraman Jenn]

Doesn't mean I didn't like his poem though. It made me grin.

[matrixman]

Proper format? Proper syllables per line?

I'm just putting down stuff that sounds and looks reasonably competent. You guys can take it or leave it.

[aliantha]

Man, tough crowd! It was Menolly who bounced my first entry because it didn't have the words at the end of the line. I'm just trying to play by the rules here.

[shadowbinding shoe]

Don't listen to the limerick-police! If it sounds good enough to us it's good enough, even if it's 7 - 35 - 12 - 3 - 1 syllables long.

Personally I tried to choose words for rhyming that had the same syllables emphasized.

[dANdeLION]

Guys, you're all forgetting the real reason that poem should be disqualified, said reason being that I did not write it. I swear, you are all such idiots! Again, for the record, I am not a writer. I do not write, therefore, I could not possible have written that poem. After 1940 days on the Watch, mostly spent proclaiming my complete and utter lack of literary skills, you'd think you guys would get it in your thick skulls that I'm not a writer!

[Menolly]

Leonine One...
...you just have no idea what you do in the semi-comatose state that French Maid puts you in.

(like your claws hovering over my donate button)

[dANdeLION]

I have every idea what I do at all times. It is the rest of you that don't know what I do. It's simple, really. In 2004, I, along with Loremaster and Hierachy, formed the Illuimed to fight off the dark forces of the Dark Bird. Hier, being a master of martial arts, decided to train a secret caste of ninja-like warriors to fight the foul minions of the Dark Bird. Lore, being a man of medicine, searched for chemical and biological methods with which to destroy the foul avian. I, having no such skills as my cohorts, decided to be a distracting factor by publicly humiliating our enemy via means of outposting him. But, the Dark Bird was way more prolific that I had imagined. One night he posted 500 times! I was almost undone. Then the answer come to me; The Dark Bird had tapped into the unlimited funds of the KW National Bank, distributing them to any newcomer in order to win their affection and loyalty. This was before Jay enacted the Ritual of Decimation and shut down the bank. Realizing I had unlimited funds to draw from, I hired several hundred professional typists to post for me, in order to outpost the Dark Bird. The combined efforts of the Illuimed weakened him enough for Jay's Ritual to take effect and temporarily remove the Dark Bird from the Watch. Unfortunately, I thought the battle would last much longer, and had signed the typists to a ten year contract, so now I just have them come up with poems and stories and stuff for me.....and sometimes even fake history lessons, too.

[matrixman]

All heed dANdeLION! He speaks of great and turbulent events out of KW's past, even things that the High Lord himself would perhaps only reluctantly mention. My own perception has been broadened.

[dlbpharmd]

So that's how I came by 1,000,000 WGDs....

[lurch]

I got some grackles that inflitrate my trees every winter. Can you run them off too?

[dANdeLION]

See, that doesn't even rhyme. Nor does it contain any of the required words. You're gonna have to do better than that if you want to win the 5 large, bub.

[wayfriend]

Will pick a winner in about 6+ hours if I get to it. So last chances to enter, and last chances to vote.

There once was a man from dANtuCKET
whose poem was so long Jenn would chuck it
There was no medicament
for it's meter impediment
And Wikipedia told us where to stuck it.

[dlbpharmd]

DW posted rhymes that are recent
My inchoate anger is puissant
I'd chuck an egg at his head
for the things that he said
Had his verses not been actually decent....

this gets my vote, because of the LOL factor and to me it flows better than any other entry.

[Hyperception]

I had grander plans for my entry, but this is all that is finished so far.

There once was a man named Covenant
Who found himself in a predicament
When he came to the Land
He did not understand
That escape was no true medicament

[Menolly]

That has my vote.

...but then, I may be a little bit biased...

[wayfriend]

Someone has said they had an opus they wanted to post ... I will leave the contest open a few extra days.

[shadowbinding shoe]

Someone has said they had an opus they wanted to post ...

I'd be eager to see an opus that's been fit into a limerick (5 lines, 40 syllables). That's one tight fit

[Cameraman Jenn]

Dlb is both handsome and wise
When friend Wayfriend he chose to advise
His words were puissant
When he spoke of his want
To give Cameraman Jenn the sweet prize.

[shadowbinding shoe]

Oh, give over, Cameraman Jenn. You're filthy rich already. You own a camera.

Wayfriend, you must judge justly here. Who needs the money more? Cameraman Jenn, or someone else...

[matrixman]

True, CMJ is hardly in desperate need of WGDs. (Heh.)

Sure, this one breaks the rules, but I still like it:

Menolly's crepuscular assatar
Was aimed straight at dAN from away afar.
But the LION was tight
With chiaroscuro might
And refused to be swayed by her brief attire.

For a "proper" entry, this one gets my vote:

Into the darkness we bravely venture,
A burnt light bulb the cause of our adventure.
The room is worse than crepuscular,
The thought of a light - spectacular.
Yet we keep on groping, like a man seeking his denture!