Why did the chicken cross the road?

[aliantha]

Aliantha: So, my work computer got replaced yet again but while the workman was there, Travelling Guy called and told me I needed to change all of his travel itinerary because he got held up on his way to the airport by this chicken that was stopped in the road.

[wayfriend]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

CAMERAMAN JENN'S BLATHER BLOG: Today was a really foul day at work. I had to go out to the Perdue store and clean up the mess left by Chicken Guy. No sooner do I walk in than he's pecking on me. He really got my feathers up. So I laid it out for him. I told him that he needed to get his little chicken feet across that road, or I was going to break some eggs. He got really mad, he was squawking like someone put a fox in his henhouse. He said he was going to call the store manager and report me. I said go ahead, the store manager liked my tailfeathers, and you would be the one who got drumsticks. I said if your not careful you'll be freerange before you know what hit you. This stopped his clucking. I think he took his chickenneck across the road right after that, I don't know, a customer came in.

[Cameraman Jenn]

Wayfriend promptly starts The Holy Order of the Chicken Haters also known as THOOTCH.

[sgt.null]

[Lefdmae Deemalr Effaeldm]

The posts here are just so awesome.

Murrin, got to say the chicken-that-was-not-a-chicken wasn't the only chicken-like creature in the story at that point, there was a whole chicken coop. And not a single word on the character development of those, how they continued with their lives after the chicken-that-was-not-a-chicken came to their normal and quiet home

Sarge, did you make me a prophet with that abc thread? Or a more like seer?)

And back to the road.

I wondered if I could make them from some random writers or other people I know well, decided to try on the ones I enlisted in the post above, already afraid of the outcome.

TMNT scriptwriter: The chicken crossed to road because there was a pool of mutagen on the other side, it wanted to become a Teenage Mutant Ninja Chicken and kick some shells tail feathers!

Stephen King: The chicken crossed to road because it felt the unnamed evil lurking under the side of the road it was on, nothing really looked amiss, but its most basic instincts screamed at it: run! get away from that side! Or you may turn into what Stephen King's characters often end up as.

Kir Bulychev: The chicken crossed to road because he was actually a shape-shifter alien that wanted to play a silly trick on his wife (or was that lover?) and get killed in the process, not like he wanted to get killed, he had only the trick part planned out.

Yngwie Malmsteen: The chicken crossed to road because it felt there was no glory on the side it was on, and it wanted to search and find where the magic of the past remained, it died long ago but the story of its quest remains and still puzzles people.

[ussusimiel]

Wayfriend promptly starts The Holy Order of the Chicken Haters also known as THOOTCH.

I would join THOOTCLH - The Holy Order of the Chicken-Linden Haters

u.

[Lefdmae Deemalr Effaeldm]

Those shortenings... makes me wonder, maybe I can start THOOSDTPSKKBFMYMSEAABAPNL or someting?

Oh.

THOOSDTPSKKBFMYMSEAABAPNL: Why did the chicken cross the road? For an immeasurable number of possible reasons.

Can you guess at least a part of the shortening?)

[Cameraman Jenn]

I'm lost!

Sorus: The chicken crossed the road because I had insider information about progress in proton cannon technology and a sale down the street on cat toys. I sent the chicken in to infiltrate the military base, steal the information and then buy up all the cat toy sale items and return to me using the zone implant to control the chicken. Thank god Hashi was in transit or he might have foiled my plans.

[Frostheart Grueburn]

Those shortenings... makes me wonder, maybe I can start THOOSDTPSKKBFMYMSEAABAPNL or someting?

Oh.

THOOSDTPSKKBFMYMSEAABAPNL: Why did the chicken cross the road? For an immeasurable number of possible reasons.

Can you guess at least a part of the shortening?)

The Holy Order of Stephen Donaldson The Patron Saint...*throws a boxful of alphabet cookies on the floor*...Apotheotical Banes, And Pompous, Narcoleptic Lingo?

[sgt.null]

[deer of the dawn]

Anyone post this yet?

[sgt.null]

...There are 'quips and quillets' which seem actual conundrums, but yet are none. Of such is this: 'Why does a chicken cross the street?['] Are you 'out of town?' Do you 'give it up?' Well, then: 'Because it wants to get on the other side!'

[aliantha]

I have a t-shirt from a local yarn shop that says on the back, "To Intarsia...and beyond!" On the front is a dog perched on a '50s rocket ship.

[sgt.null]

I have a t-shirt from a local yarn shop that says on the back, "To Intarsia...and beyond!" On the front is a dog perched on a '50s rocket ship.

i had to look it up - do you mean a sewing method???

[aliantha]

My work here is done.

It's a knitting technique. It's how you attach two areas of different colors together while you're knitting the piece:



Basically you have to twist the two colors of yarn around each other at the borders of the design. I've never knitted an argyle pattern, but yeah, I guess that would be intarsia.

And from googling, you can do intarsia in woodworking, too, and no yarn twisting is involved. Who knew?

[deer of the dawn]

So apparently, the chicken crossed the road to learn new knitting techniques. Mystery solved.

[aliantha]

So apparently, the chicken crossed the road to learn new knitting techniques. Mystery solved.

Or to learn a new woodworking technique.

Both of which would be difficult to do without opposable thumbs.

The plot thickens!

The Poultry

Let's think of eggs.
They have no legs.
Chickens come from eggs,
But they have legs.
The plot thickens:
Eggs come from chickens
But have no legs under 'em.
What a conundrum!

[sgt.null]

And from googling, you can do intarsia in woodworking, too, and no yarn twisting is involved. Who knew?

him did....

[DoctorGamgee]

Because the road was in need of a good blessing?!? (the trick being getting the chicken to genuflect...)

[sgt.null]

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