Bad Illustrating Contest

[shadowbinding shoe]

As an aside, to me, this cover was SO awful anyway. To think there was something worse!!

Hmm... maybe the horrible cover Zorm mentioned wasn't really discarded, just touched up a bit.

[Frostheart Grueburn]

As an aside, to me, this cover was SO awful anyway. To think there was something worse!!

(Could you please post larger images when referring to one or alternatively link to one? My eyesight isn't brilliant. )

Anyway, this...concoction. I don't claim the title of the world's best artist, far, far from it, but I can still point out several grievances in this:

-Someone sliced a good portion off from Linden's hip. Not attractive
-Covenant looks like Honninscrave's midget brother molded in wax
-Multiple perspective errors
-Honninscrave. Graargh asdfasasd blarrgh. I don't know whether it's the googly-eyed fangirl in me ranting or what, but he's the hugest annoyance here. His head's plain lopsided and too large, and why does he crouch there utterly naked, appearing as if incredibly constipated? Did the binding spell also tear off his pants, braies, and mail serk, or what? Covenant' sort of strategically placed to cover his starfare's gems.
-Etc.

For all it's worth, I guess I like the color scheme.




Sweet has something of a reputation with wonky anatomy and quirky perspectives, however. Think this represents a prime example of the previous:
www.goodshowsir.co.uk/2012/01/to-ride-pegasus/

Shoe: In the event of the cover being only "touched up", I can sort of make the character connections now.
Covenant = Hunchback, Linden = Antoinette, Grimmand = Rhino, Gibbon = Hawkman.

*headdesk*

[Ananda]

Foreground is Thomas and Linden
Background, from left to right is Hollian, a haruchai, The First (obviously since she's the only dwarf in the picture), and the mechanical Honniscrave.
Featured at the top is the white gold ring.

I was going to do Fabio, too, Deer. Great minds think alike! I love your 'don't touch me' bit. That was awesome.

[Frostheart Grueburn]

*dies*

I swear; one of these days I'm going to accidentally inhale something up to my nose while laughing too hard at this thread.

Brilliant! I think I like the samurai-haruchai and the utterly garish ring here the best, and also the fact that with each submission, we drift farther away from WGW's actual content and SRD's description. Whose head is the First dragging? Don't tell me she ate Pitchwife.

I'll also let people vote on the winners. It's getting rather impossible for me to decide one over the other.

[wayfriend]

Awesome, Ananda. One of the better monkeyless entries, I must say. (And I applaud your clever attempt to make Donaldson appear Finlandinavian on a subliminal level.)

So it's a kind of an inverted perspective, where objects moving nearer actually end up further away and tinier.

All I can do here is point out that this is a contest for bad illustrating, and that I have attempted to make my entry be bad illustrating on every conceivable level.

According to this rule of thumb, how large is the Monkey?

The monkey is, I feel, an everyman: the existential observer. A "cigar guy", if you will. He's not actually present, except in how we reflect on this scene. Hence, his expression of shock and, perhaps, disapproval. He is the OMG. Therefore, his size is our size, the size of the eyeball that views this picture.

[Ananda]

One of the better monkeyless entries, I must say.

According to this rule of thumb, how large is the Monkey?

The monkey is, I feel, an everyman: the existential observer. A "cigar guy", if you will. He's not actually present, except in how we reflect on this scene. Hence, his expression of shock and, perhaps, disapproval. He is the OMG. Therefore, his size is our size, the size of the eyeball that views this picture.

Fixed a new version for your philosophy, Wayfriend. I see this monkey is very important now. The first one will be my entry, though. this is just for Wayfriend.

[wayfriend]

I see this monkey is very important now.

And that, succintly, is the essense of art itself. Without a monkey, art has no raison d'etre. Ananda, I think you learned a little bit about art today, and, perhaps, a little bit about yourself, too.

Thank you for the monkey.

[deer of the dawn]

Oh my.... !!!!!!

It just keeps getting badder and badderer.

[Frostheart Grueburn]

I'm afraid you guys will have to survive without the crown candidate till I drag myself back from random pits of mud and slush.

Also some adjustments to the prize monies: as usual, I had somehow mixed up the sum with my own measly wgd's while feverish and headachy. Keep me away from simple math while in sickbed.

[deer of the dawn]

So sorry you're not feeling well! Don't worry, we can wait. Maybe we'll get even more submissions.

[Ananda]

Plus, it is a holiday weekend. Why would you think of work?

[Frostheart Grueburn]

Thanks, I'm better. I'll return to the matter after the deadline, since I won't be spending much time at the computer before that. =)

Heyhey, there's still a week's worth of time to submit, get your creative juices flowing! Craft something so awful that it would make SRD want to feed us to the Lurker alive (instead of the Justin Bieber clones from Deer's game).

[Linna Heartbooger]

Awesome, Ananda. One of the better monkeyless entries, I must say. (And I applaud your clever attempt to make Donaldson appear Finlandinavian on a subliminal level.)

Nice one! ...I didn't catch that.

The monkey is, I feel, an everyman: the existential observer. A "cigar guy", if you will. He's not actually present, except in how we reflect on this scene. Hence, his expression of shock and, perhaps, disapproval. He is the OMG. Therefore, his size is our size, the size of the eyeball that views this picture.

Waxing philosophical here... I like it.

[sgt.null]

zorm - i kicked in some cash for your prize. award it wisely.

[deer of the dawn]

I say it's hard enough work picking one winner. The judge should feel free to unload it all on one person or split it if they feel better about that. Keep in mind the next winner has to be the next judge, so they need a certain number of WGDs to keep the game going. Let's not make being judge too much work!

[Ananda]

Let's not make being judge too much work!

What?? I thought she should have to come over too the city of all entrants and sweep the floor. That sounds reasonable to me. Our hustomte is expecting her already an will be angry if she doesn't come.

[deer of the dawn]

If I knew what a hustomte was, I would tell her to sweep her own dang floor unless she has personally submitted an entry to the contest. Besides, tickets to Nigeria (if I won) would be more than 1000 WGDs.

[Shaun das Schaf]

I can't operate photoshop to save myself, (not that I can imagine a situation in which a would-be murderer orders me to doctor up a picture of a monkey or face certain death), but anyway, I just wanted to pop by to say this thread has entertained me muchly. You are all very talented.

Thank-you and carry on.

[Shuram Gudatetris]

This doesn't show up very well, but I drew this up while I was very bored during a four day stay at a hospital. I know it doesn't quite qualify, and I forgot the monkey, but here you go:

[wayfriend]

That's absolutely clever!