THOOLAH has come to redeem your mortal soul.

[Sherman Landlearner]

I Hate Linden Avery. Initially I thought she wasn't so bad you know? every group needs a healer. and then I started getting longer chapters with her annoying selfish complaining. Still, I strove to forgive her because her past "problems" to my dismay I even tried to rationalize her sending the Haruchai away from the elohimfest.. then I realized that she just uses her past as an excuse to not do things... what a bitch. The last straw was when she decided to try and kill Ceer... I was so angry.. I wish Cail kicked her harder... maybe in the face region, you know? Oh and when Brinn punched her in the face! genius.. he was awake the whole time just waiting for the perfect time to punch her in the face.. I knew it. Re-reading these books has made me hate the character known as Linden Avery.

I would be honored to serve as a member of THOOLAH. may I wear the badge and take up service with the brave and enlightened members of this group?

It's free to JOIN us.... Leaving, however, is very expensive. Mwahahaha!

[ussusimiel]

I would be honored to serve as a member of THOOLAH. may I wear the badge and take up service with the brave and enlightened members of this group?

All that is needed to be a member of THOOLAH is an enlightened heart and mind that sees the Truth about Linden. You have been a member of THOOLAH from that first dawning of the Light, now you just know you are Grab whatever gear you need and take up the Fight!

THOOLAH!

u.

[Vraith]

I would be honored to serve as a member of THOOLAH. may I wear the badge and take up service with the brave and enlightened members of this group?

All that is needed to be a member of THOOLAH is an enlightened heart and mind that sees the Truth about Linden. You have been a member of THOOLAH from that first dawning of the Light, now you just know you are Grab whatever gear you need and take up the Fight!

THOOLAH!

u.

I agree with Uss, all that is required to be a member of THOOLAH is an enlightened heart...which of course is due to the fact that one drawn to THOOLAH, by definition, can't find his/her own ass with both hands and a flashlight, therefore while bending over to search for it, accidentally buries flashlight in his/her own chest enlightening, however briefly, the heart.
And, before dying, [one can live a surprisingly long, painful, and self-reflective while with a self-inflicted hole in one's chest] said THOOLAH prospect and/or member, naturally, bashes his/her head against the nearest solid object, whining in that common, pre-literate, cat[in heat]erwauling register and volume "HOW could I have been so STUPID?!?"
Which action, or course, shatters the skull, allowing light to reach the "mind."
At which point, almost all the "near-death" survivors have reported feeling intimidated, seeing a bright light, hearing beloved figures long dead telling them...
"It didn't happen because you "have been" stupid. It happened because you ARE stupid...this is your last chance to stop being that."

[Savor Dam]

Truly, the days when THOOLAH can be considered credible are numbered. October is coming...and while the content of TLD must remain shrouded, it is significant that the apparent leader of OPAL, an individual who has long trumpeted that she does not change, has admitted that she has started to lean in Linden's favor. If her steadfast opinion is ceasing to be pending, what can that mean?

Give up while there is still time for your error to be forgotten. Renounce THOOLAH.

[dlbpharmd]

Renounce THOOLAH.

Never.

[aTOMiC]

Truly, the days when THOOLAH can be considered credible are numbered. October is coming...and while the content of TLD must remain shrouded, it is significant that the apparent leader of OPAL, an individual who has long trumpeted that she does not change, has admitted that she has started to lean in Linden's favor. If her steadfast opinion is ceasing to be pending, what can that mean?

Give up while there is still time for your error to be forgotten. Renounce THOOLAH.

What would I place on a bumper sticker if I were the type to infect my car with such things?

"Linden Sucks!"

Most passersby wouldn't understand what it meant...but I would.

[Vraith]

Truly, the days when THOOLAH can be considered credible are numbered. October is coming...and while the content of TLD must remain shrouded, it is significant that the apparent leader of OPAL, an individual who has long trumpeted that she does not change, has admitted that she has started to lean in Linden's favor. If her steadfast opinion is ceasing to be pending, what can that mean?

Give up while there is still time for your error to be forgotten. Renounce THOOLAH.

What would I place on a bumper sticker if I were the type to infect my car with such things?

"Linden Sucks!"

Most passersby wouldn't understand what it meant...but I would.

Turn back, aTOMic,
Forswear thy foolish ways
Old now is the Land
And none may count it's days
{bah-da-ba-da-dum....}
Yet thou, THOOLAH-er
Whose head is crowned with flames
Still will not hear
Thine inner Linden Army proclaims

Turn back, O man
Turn back, O man...
Turn back, aTOMic
Forswear...thy.....FOO0ooooo-liiish......
Waaaaaaaaaaaaays.

[ussusimiel]

I agree with Uss, all that is required to be a member of THOOLAH is an enlightened heart...which of course is due to the fact that one drawn to THOOLAH, by definition, can't find his/her own ass with both hands and a flashlight, therefore while bending over to search for it, accidentally buries flashlight in his/her own chest enlightening, however briefly, the heart.
And, before dying, [one can live a surprisingly long, painful, and self-reflective while with a self-inflicted hole in one's chest] said THOOLAH prospect and/or member, naturally, bashes his/her head against the nearest solid object, whining in that common, pre-literate, cat[in heat]erwauling register and volume "HOW could I have been so STUPID?!?"
Which action, or course, shatters the skull, allowing light to reach the "mind."
At which point, almost all the "near-death" survivors have reported feeling intimidated, seeing a bright light, hearing beloved figures long dead telling them...
"It didn't happen because you "have been" stupid. It happened because you ARE stupid...this is your last chance to stop being that."

What pain-ridden lives we THOOLAHites lead in our last moments, still, it's better than having to listen to Linden's whining!

Renounce THOOLAH.

Never.

+1

"Linden Sucks!"

Most passersby wouldn't understand what it meant...but I would.

u.

[aTOMiC]

"Linden Sucks!"

Most passersby wouldn't understand what it meant...but I would.

Linden's Army members, please don't hate me because I think this is funny.

[ussusimiel]

I loved the SRD-tastic use of long words! It'd be even better if you could get in one of the truly unique SRD classics like: 'analystic', 'roynish', 'ambergris' 'clinquant', 'unhermeneuticable' etc.

u.

[wayfriend]

"Linden Avery Aspirates Malefically" ?

[Shuram Gudatetris]

I re-read the 2nd Chronicles over the last couple of months.

I always thought I was THOOLAH. But I read a totally different story this time around. (Keep in mind that I have read the 2nd Chronicles several times already.) She is strong, she is brave, and she is inspiring. She is one hell of a healer. She has moments of weakness, as we all do, but she overcomes those moments and proves her worth. So I guess I can get over her "watery" eyes.

I will cast my lot with the Chosen.

[dlbpharmd]

Your THOOLAH membership card will auto-destruct in 3 seconds......

[aTOMiC]

I have read the 2ND Chrons an estimated 4 or 5 times over the years and never hated or actively disliked Linden Avery, mainly because she played a supporting role and also because she provided aid and comfort to TC in ways he had not experienced in many years to that point in his life.

Then, with much anticipation, I began reading the Last Chrons and I found myself experiencing the same emotion over and over, growing stronger and stronger as the story unfolded until I couldn't contain my frustration any longer.

Spoiler

I remember saying aloud at one point "Hellfire and damnation! Enough with Linden Avery already! Get to the part where Thomas Covenant returns !" A disembodied voice that may or may not be TC wasn't satisfying enough for me.
It was at this point that Linden had begun to wear out her welcome. I don't read The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant in order to spend time with some other character. I'd probably be pretty annoyed at any other character taking center stage for far too long. Even some of my favorites. Even Foamfollower, even Mhoram take your pick. Its frustrating and distracting.

(It reminds me of the Bourne Legacy or Die Hard 5 or Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. There's nothing really wrong with Jeremy Renner's character or Mutt or John McClane's son but it seemed the more screen time they got the less interesting the story was. Renner isn't Matt Damon and Indiana Jones doesn't need Shia Labouf trying to carry the picture for him. Short-round didn't get in the way because he spent his time supporting the protagonist. Imagine going to Indiana Jones 6 and its entirely about a grown up Short-round and Indiana talks to him over the phone for 3 minutes. What?
Don't get me wrong I know Linden plays a more integral part in the Chrons than a Short-round but neither is she the real point of the story.

I've said it before. By all means write 3 books about Linden Avery just don't call it The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant. Its like making a blockbuster film about a giant androgynous iguana attacking New York and calling it Godzilla.)

Sure TC returns eventually and that's great and getting to read a few chapters from his POV gives me the satisfaction I was looking for from the beginning of Runes but before very long at all its back to Linden's pov. Ugh.

Wait. Didn't I type all of this somewhere else? I'm sure I did.

Look its not Linden's fault that I don't care for her. SRD created the character and he's the puppet master. I am absolutely sure that the author would rather I hate LA than not give a crap about her so its a victory for him to be sure which I guess is really the point. SRD wants me, he wants all of us, to feel SOMETHING when reading his books and in that regard he's been successful.

[wayfriend]

Final Chronicles Spoilers! Final Chronicles Spoilers!

[aTOMiC]

Final Chronicles Spoilers! Final Chronicles Spoilers!

Redacted.

[MsMary]

I agree with Uss, all that is required to be a member of THOOLAH is an enlightened heart...which of course is due to the fact that one drawn to THOOLAH, by definition, can't find his/her own ass with both hands and a flashlight, therefore while bending over to search for it, accidentally buries flashlight in his/her own chest enlightening, however briefly, the heart.
And, before dying, [one can live a surprisingly long, painful, and self-reflective while with a self-inflicted hole in one's chest] said THOOLAH prospect and/or member, naturally, bashes his/her head against the nearest solid object, whining in that common, pre-literate, cat[in heat]erwauling register and volume "HOW could I have been so STUPID?!?"
Which action, or course, shatters the skull, allowing light to reach the "mind."
At which point, almost all the "near-death" survivors have reported feeling intimidated, seeing a bright light, hearing beloved figures long dead telling them...
"It didn't happen because you "have been" stupid. It happened because you ARE stupid...this is your last chance to stop being that."

What pain-ridden lives we THOOLAHites lead in our last moments, still, it's better than having to listen to Linden's whining!

Renounce THOOLAH.

Never.

+1

"Linden Sucks!"

Most passersby wouldn't understand what it meant...but I would.

u.

You guys are cracking me the heck up.

[Sherman Landlearner]

You THOOLAH exiles clearly have way too much time to contemplate the lives of THOOLAH members. Perhaps if you were a THOOLAH member, you'd have better things to do than re-(re-re-re-)read Linden's whining and dream of a better life. You'd be living one. Personally, I've marked all the places where Linden's whining begin and end in my copies. Now I never have to read her BS again. Mwahahaha.

[CerealKiller]

Lurker deLurking. I was kind of apathetic to Linden in the Second Chronicles, but I have developed such a frothing hatred of her that I have not been able to finish The Runes of the Earth. I have picked it up several times over the years but usually give up a little more than half way through. Does she get any more palatable in the following books? I may just give up on Ruins and start again at Fatal.
aTOMic, thanks for the bumper sticker in your July 16 post. I have it in my car back window, above my desk at work and use it as part of my avatar on other board.
I humbly request that you please accept mey THOOLAH application.

[Orlion]

Lurker deLurking. I was kind of apathetic to Linden in the Second Chronicles, but I have developed such a frothing hatred of her that I have not been able to finish The Runes of the Earth. I have picked it up several times over the years but usually give up a little more than half way through. Does she get any more palatable in the following books? I may just give up on Ruins and start again at Fatal.
aTOMic, thanks for the bumper sticker in your July 16 post. I have it in my car back window, above my desk at work and use it as part of my avatar on other board.
I humbly request that you please accept mey THOOLAH application.

Howdy CerealKiller, and welcome to the Watch! You will notice the forum below this one discusses the Last Chronicles by book, there you should be able to get the advice you crave.