The Inner Garden

[danlo]

There is no right or wrong in the world...only suffering and joy

Not only did this pensive quote give me pause but it also led to a severe reevaluation of my life and deep inner self. It was as if the great Jack Handley were looking over my shoulder and said, "danlo it is time to come down from the mountian (commonly known as my superior pedestal) and lead the poor misguided 'sheep-clique' to harmony and spiritual freedom."
My friends! As we wander in meditation past the great artifacts of Ankor-Wat, Lhasa, Tel El-Armarna and Euro Disney let us analyse the word of the holey chainlink.

The Master has been studying Qighon, Shaolin, Lao Tsu, Confusious, fortune cookies, Hallmark and crakerjack lately but neglects to inform us of the Buddist influence on such teachings. Suffering is the price we must pay, in our various incarnations, if we are to ascend to enlightenment, hop off the Mahayana and fuse Atman with Bhraman. Then we shall find etenal bliss and the 'joy' the Master speaks of. But what happens the meantime? As Osho the Fool says, "Before you are wise, after you are wise, inbetween you are otherwise."

Sit now on the ricemats, gaze into the lily pond as Mt. Fuji rises in the background through the morning mists. Sip your tea and examine exactly what is going on with yourself. Our guest speaker is here to give you feedback. What's that you say? You feel so-so? Leaning slightly to the right dAN? The Master says this will not do...there is no middle ground. Our guest speaker, Mr. Smalley, has taken that all into account.

"That's okay. We can't all attain the Master's level in just one sitting. It's alright to say stuff that makes absolutely no intellectual sense in General Discussion on Kevin's Watch. The Master is on his appointed plane right now-lecturing his peers on the Terry Brooks discussion board. If you're not suffering or joyful, if you're feeling a bit right or wrong, that's okay. It is time to look at the mirror of you soul and say, 'I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and, gosh darnit, people like me'.




(except, maybe Zeph )

[dANdeLION]

Sit on the rice mat? Oh, damn. *burps* Are there any more left? They go so good with tea.....

[dANdeLION]

So tell me, master; is there a Rocket Surgeon so great that he can make a Rocket that he himself cannot operate on?

[aTOMiC]

I'm intrigued by the notions put forth here. I struggle with a pain that does not end. I feel a burden that does not lessen. I feel an itch that defies all scratching. I have a burning sensation that will not cease. I know a man who will not rest. I see a tree that will not dance. I have a rock that will not roll. I know all things and yet I am ignorant, fey and anile. Don't treat me differently because I am so good looking. I sweat like the rest of you vermin/gods. I seek wisdom to sooth my discomfort. A salve to lessen my irritation. A freedom to lessen my bondage. I choose the path of brightness and fog. I walk the walk of the crippled. I see the darkens of the blind. I know the crushing pain of the embarrassed and I cry. I weep. I morn. I, Robot.

[dANdeLION]

You ought to have a doctor look at that; It sounds like you've been doing ALT 255 without the protection of a +.

[hierachy]

If we get through this, you and I, Tom C, we can set up a support group for all the other + neglecters. I am almost through the worst of it, although somtimes the nightmares still haunt me. You can make it, Tom C, never lose hope.

[dANdeLION]

Yes, keep a + attitude.

[danlo]

is there a Rocket Surgeon so great that he can make a Rocket that he himself cannot operate on?

Yes in creating a Rocket that operates on itself...or pitches for the Houston Astros.

Here is a Pepcid for dAN
some penicllin for Tom
and Monkey stop eating pepperoni pizza b4 bed!

Now bow your heads and contemplate your navel. Ask yourselves: Is this the direct connection to my Atman, have I been abusing my third Chakra lately? Is this the true path, though the umbilical wormhole, to the creation of all things? Is there any lint present and do I have an inny or an outty?

[dANdeLION]

Donlo, dANlo; don't you know? There is no inny or outty; there is only the pain of separation form one's mother, or the freedom of escaping the confines of the womb.

[danlo]

I am interested in hearing more of your thought on this complex matter, Weedhopper, as long as you address me anything other than DonHo

[dANdeLION]

Hey, you can't prove nuttin'

[danlo]

famous danlo adage "The proof is in the pudding and there's always room for Jello..."

[dANdeLION]

How profound; how.....yummy. Anyway, as I sat here trying to master non-euclidian grammer, I felt a question burning in my chest. It is a question asked of me 1000 times, mostly by American youths, all looking to better themselves through hard, productive work. I see their plight and have been unable to answer the question, even though there are only two possible answers, for fear that the wrong answer might devastate their bright futures. So I have come here seeking wisdom. Oh, yeah; the question. Paper, or plastic?

[danlo]

This question is probably better answered in The Think Tank because of the environmental and political implications. It really gives rise to even more intricate questions like, "Are we reseeding the forests fast enuff to replace that bag that hides your bottle of Mad Dog 20/20?" and "Is our vested interest in Iraq simply for convenient tote devices in local supermarkets that can be recycled as makeshift doggie pooper-scoopers?"

As Tom Lehrer once said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."

and remember when Flakey Foont posed the central question of the meaning of life, the Universe and everything to Mr. Natural, his response was, "It don't mean sheeeeet..."

[aTOMiC]

I'm a bit puzzled by your post, danlo. I don't mean to dispute your comments but I cannot resolve the conflict I feel when I read what you've written. First of all it would be helpful to me if you would clear up the little matter of the bottle. What kind of bottle is it? Is it somehow related to the Mad Dog 20/20 reference? Another point that makes me scratch my head is your use of the word "IS". How do you justify using such a word? I'm very troubled by this entire thread but your comments are troubling most of all. I don't like being troubled. I don't seek troubling things and when I find them I'm frankly troubled. Please explain.

[danlo]

Being troubled is part of the growth process... and the bottle is 750ml

[dANdeLION]

Well, you can't get very for without saying "is".....

[aTOMiC]

Thank you, danlo. I feel a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. The air seems fresher. The sky a bit brighter. The sun a bit hotter. The ground a bit harder. This thread a bit more coherent. I am willing to let the "is" comment slide for the sake of harmony.

[danlo]

IS that right!!!!!????

[dANdeLION]

Danlo, I'm shocked!! THe true master would not break a bent reed so! Now quickly, go outside and throw 3 Hail Mary's.