Kevin's Watch

I did have nothing to do with it! That's what I keep trying to tell you!

Congratulations, sirs!

Thanks Wyldewode.

Congratulations? For what? I didn't do anything!

dANdeLION wrote:I did have nothing to do with it! That's what I keep trying to tell you!

this is a zen riddle?

Hey, if I asked a Zen riddle in the forest, and there was nobody there to hear it, did I make a sound?

Tom just sent me Matrixman's review of this book. Matrix, you're too kind. Really. Way too kind. Anyway, Tom also sent me his reply to MM, and in it he generically mentions the motivation behind publishing the book. Well, here's the exact comment that Tom referred to:

Malik23 wrote:Just like any loser with a couple thousand can self-publish his book--it doesn't mean you'll get read.

That quote can be found HERE

It is Tom's (and my own) belief that a loser need not have a couple thousand (dollars is the implication Malik's post left me with; maybe he'll chime in and clarify this if I'm incorrect) to self-publish; that it can be done for free! Now, if only there was some extenal motivation for writing the stories in the book; that, my friends, may have made a difference.

I suppose it might be true nowadays that any "loser" out there can just sit down, write up something and have it published with relative ease. But would the published junk of many of those fools out there possess the same entertainment value as TOM and dAN's Flower of Doom? I guess it all depends on what you look for in a piece of writing. Even if Flower of Doom may have been meant as a practical joke, it was still something worth reading, and I sure as hell got a kick out of it.

Anyway, the kind of writing (as well as message board postings) I'm thinking of that I couldn't stand reading are the kind that are nothing more than narrow-minded, hate-filled, dogmatic diatribes. There's plenty of that out there, and I avoid them as much as I can.

Matrixman wrote: Anyway, the kind of writing (as well as message board postings) I'm thinking of that I couldn't stand reading are the kind that are nothing more than narrow-minded, hate-filled, dogmatic diatribes.

that has a nice flow.

I like how he cleverly avoided saying FoD sucks.

Clouseau wrote:I like how he cleverly avoided saying FoD sucks.

i think he did say just that. sorry.

I've decided to post the full review from Matrixman.
He states at the bottom of his post that he doesn't mind what I do with it. I found the review more entertaining than the book itself. Worthy to sit beside Null's, Cail's and Aliantha's.
Thank goodness Matrix included the "short review" because I really don't have space on the back cover for the full review, although I'm tempted to include all the reviews at the beginning of the book. That's done from time to time, right?

Everyone enjoy!


The Short Review:

This strange, fantastical, labyrinthine, hilarious and exasperating story will leave you either wonderfully amused or desperately reaching for some Tylenol.

The Somewhat Longer Review:

This isn't so much a story as it is a collection of story fragments -- or episodes, to be really generous. We veer from one odd scenario to the next. The destinies of the characters seem dependent on whether or not they have privileged knowledge of the true nature of Southerland Castle. Did you know or didn't you know? Through sheer repetition like some cosmic mantra, the question becomes the punchline of the whole story.

I'm reminded of the sentiment: "Great, I read the book...now will someone tell me what it's about?" A linear, straightforward story this is not. The Flower of Doom is a gleeful jumble of kaleidoscopic images and emotions that together may form a coherent picture if you look hard enough. But I think most of the time, you'll be scratching your head, wondering what on earth is going on.

The 2nd movement of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony was once notably described as a "miracle of repetition." I think that is also an apt description of The Flower of Doom. (Also, my apologies to Ludwig for dragging his name into this.) Now, whether one regards the repetitions in this story as being "miraculous" or just "ludicrous" might well depend on one's mood at the time of reading. There is a feeling of restlessness, of rushing to some climax or destination, while the repeating motifs in the story also give it a sense of stasis. A endless tape loop.

Or maybe it's more accurate to think of The Flower of Doom as a holographic puzzle. Choose different angles and the picture shifts to show different aspects of itself.

But what does it all mean? That we are doomed to always repeat ourselves? That the big picture always eludes us?

What does Southerland Castle represent? Unattainable knowledge, from the point of view of those left behind?

The main problem as I see it is the awkward mix of pathos and parody that runs throughout. I have read other examples of Mr. Cummins's work, and I know he's capable of portraying exciting action and drama. And I know that Mr. Southard is capable of the most biting comedy. I'm just not convinced that, in this work, the two have struck the best balance between comedy and drama. I'm thinking particularly of Part 14: Tempest. It presents a genuinely wrenching scene, but it is compromised by the need to insert the tag line about Southerland Castle. The depiction of Tempest's self sacrifice is stark and serious as it should be - it does not need to be saddled by a running joke.

I feel that things work much better in, say, Part 15: The Man In Grey, which is among my favorites. I also liked the POV of Part 23: Out of the Loop. Part 24: The Object was another memorable piece where tragedy and hilarity seem to collide and yet it works for the most part. Part 26: Legacy is outstanding for its vivid, over-the-top depiction of magical combat. Finally, I must honorably (dishonorably?) mention Part 17: Martin the Clown for delivering some of the most masterfully torturous prose I have ever seen. It's just brilliant, and not for the faint of heart!

To recap, I think this is an odd and baffling but still entertaining story that raises many questions but gives very few answers. Could a sequel be in the works? Me, I'd prefer it if the authors simply took one of these story "episodes" - any one will do - and developed a full story out of it.

So, there you have it. Hope I don't come across as being too harsh. I just wanted to give an honest appraisal. Do what you will with this review. Delete it, send it to INTERPOL, whatever...


Just awesome. Thanks again MM!!!!

BTW. I've just uploaded what will likely be the last and hopefully most complete and error free version of Flower of Doom. ( I make no promises. I keep referring to this project as a LIVING document.) I've made some extensive changes to create a more recognizable flow to the stories but it's still runs more in the unfettered crowd than that of say the Council of Lords.
dAN took some time to do some QC editing and I managed to add, all or parts of the various reviews we've received from you, to the back jacket cover. FYI

Wait....Does this mean I have to read it again?

Cail wrote:Wait....Does this mean I have to read it again?

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I believe there are whole new chapters that have been added since you read it Cail.
I suppose if you are brave enough.......

aTOMiC wrote:BTW. I've just uploaded what will likely be the last and hopefully most complete and error free version of Flower of Doom. ( I make no promises. I keep referring to this project as a LIVING document.) I've made some extensive changes to create a more recognizable flow to the stories but it's still runs more in the unfettered crowd than that of say the Council of Lords.
dAN took some time to do some QC editing and I managed to add, all or parts of the various reviews we've received from you, to the back jacket cover. FYI

i am getting rewarded for reading more???

sgt.null wrote:

aTOMiC wrote:BTW. I've just uploaded what will likely be the last and hopefully most complete and error free version of Flower of Doom. ( I make no promises. I keep referring to this project as a LIVING document.) I've made some extensive changes to create a more recognizable flow to the stories but it's still runs more in the unfettered crowd than that of say the Council of Lords.
dAN took some time to do some QC editing and I managed to add, all or parts of the various reviews we've received from you, to the back jacket cover. FYI

i am getting rewarded for reading more???

Sure I suppose. I guess the reading itself should be its own reward but...

I should have been offered some Tums for editing the god-rotting thing.

Clouseau wrote:I should have been offered some Tums for editing the god-rotting thing.

Only Tums? How about Pepto Bismal, Prilosec, Milk of Magnesia, Pepsid, Cod Liver Oil, Doan's Pills, Anacin, St. Joseph's Children's aspirin, Flintstone's chewables, Morhpine, Opium, Spinal Surgery, Lotto winnings...

flinstone's morphine tablets.

that has such an appealing ring to it.