Stephen C. McKinney Memorial Thread (1969-2001)

Post by **Furls Fire** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 12:13 am

Here's Imani!!

Told ya she was precious

Post by **dlbpharmd** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 2:39 am

She's beautiful, Furlsy!

Post by **duchess of malfi** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 3:08 pm

Your new daughter is beautiful!!!!

Post by **Furls Fire** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 3:25 pm

Steals your heart, doesn't she?

I saw Stephen the other day. Now, I always talk to him, and I "hear" him speak back to me. But, this time, I actually saw and talked to him. LOL!! I can hear some of your thoughts..."oh, she's lost it now." "Get the net!!" Hehehehe.

Ah sigh, there are parts of me that I have kept well hidden. Stories and abilities that are so beyond this world. People always wonder about my strong faith. They always ask me how I can be so sure about the existance of the Lord. And I hesitate to answer because more than likely, the net would come out. But, after Stephen's visit, I thought I would share just a little bit with you.

I was asked once by someone on this board how is it that I know so absolutely that Isaiah has found peace in heaven, with the Father. The answer is simple. I saw him there. An angel came to me and took me to where he was. (Some may recall the dream I had of him in the tree). But that isn't all. I talked to Isaiah himself, and he told me how beautiful heaven was, and that how God had made him was just how He wanted him to be.

I sometimes talk about my house, and how "I feel the Lord's presence in the very walls". *Takes a deep breath, because she knows that what she is about to say next will chase some from this thread forever.* Angels walk the halls and rooms of my house. I have seen them, and a couple of my kids, not all, have seen them. I see them, feel them, hear them. They brush past me, or they touch my face, or they present themselves to me and whisper love to me. People walk into my house and smile instantly. Not knowing why they do. They say things like, "it's so warm in here" or "love is almost tangible in here." Isaiah, himself, walked in and instantly fell to his knees saying "It's like walking through a threshold into the heart of Love itself." Chelsea sees the angels, Brooke sees them, Tristan sees them. And, I believe Stevie sees them, I'll catch him smiling and reaching out, to what the normal eye would be thin air, but I see an angel.

So, who did I chase away?

My brother was/is holy. My brother was a vessel of the Lord on this Earth. He brought the lost back to Jesus. He fought the emmisaries of evil that walk the Earth that most don't even know are there. His journals are full of such battles (I shared only a couple with all of you). And, my brother talked to Jesus and Angels. "AIDS dementia" is what some say to me. Um, no. My brother did not have AIDS when he was 4 years old and talked to Jesus. He did not have AIDS at 13 when Jesus came to him again and told him that he would be going Home sooner than most. He did not have AIDS at 8 when he gave all his birthday presents away to the poor and that night angels came to him and kissed him. He did not have AIDS at 17 (well, he was HIV positive at that point, but we didn't know about it), when he disappeared into the desert for 5 days where he talked with God, Who told him what his true path was to be and came back declaring that he was not going to become a priest, that there was other work for him to do.

Ah, why I'm I going on about this? Those of you who have stayed and listened may be asking...

Because, he came to me the other day. And he was radiant and beautiful...glorious. And when he spoke, his voice rang with the sweet music of Heaven. He pulsed with Joy and Light. And he smiled, that smile I knew and loved when he lived here. He stood in the snow, near the trees that border our property here on the Mountain. He cast no shadow, and the bright sun was dimmed by his presence. I went out to him.

"So, you have some trouble ahead." he said.

"Not so bad. I will get through it." I said back to him. How did you get here?"

He shrugged. "I just came."

"I miss you, Stephen. I love you."

"I love you. But no need to miss me. I'm always here. You know that. Your house, it is full."

"There is always room for more."

"Yes. Isaiah. Silezia. Both smile at you from where they are. And those that are lost, are finding their way. It is you."

"Not just me. I showed them you."

He smiled wider. "You will be well, my radiant sister. Well and happy and old. This is only a brief trouble."

And he was gone.

I went back inside my house, and heard the voices of the angels whispering love. And I knew then, I will be just fine.

Post by **duchess of malfi** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 3:43 pm

You haven't lost me, Furls. I know that some people have a spiritual gift that most of us do not have.

Your family seems to be rich in it.

In doing family history research down in Virginia I ran into the court papers for the Harmans, one of the families I come down from. One of them had a vision of Jesus, who told him that all humans are as equal in the eyes of God. So he went to the courthouse in Tazewell and freed his slaves. And, yes, I am pretty sure that his neighbors probably muttered about getting out the nets, too.

Post by **Fist and Faith** » Sat Feb 19, 2005 4:44 pm

OMG IMANI IS GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, you told me about your dementia long ago, so you haven't lost me.

(In case any don't know, Tracie knows darned well I'm joking.)

duchess of malfi wrote:You haven't lost me, Furls. I know that some people have a spiritual gift that most of us do not have. Your family seems to be rich in it.

I don't mean to trivialize that idea, but it reminds me that the Force is strong in the Skywalker family.

As I say time and time and time again, I don't know what the Truth is. I have never had any kind of personal experiences like Tracie talks about, but that doesn't mean they aren't really happening to her. I can't logically explain why one person would be born with such things, as she and her kids and Stephen were, while others never get it. OTOH, there's NO possibility that this glorious woman that I love dearly, who is kind and generous, open-minded, as insightful and intelligent as anyone I know, entirely coherent and logical, actually is in the grip of severe dementia. Such riddles are beyond me, so rather than go crazy trying to solve them, I'll just go on loving Tracie.

Post by **duchess of malfi** » Sun Feb 20, 2005 8:21 pm

Well put, Fist.

I have never had any such spiritual visions or experiences myself, but they quite obviously happen to other people, who swear by them -- and in some cases, like Mr. Harman, can be profoundly changed by them

.

Who am I to judge?

Sun Feb 20, 2005 8:24 pm

Imani looks almost identical to my niece, Brynn. Be careful! Kids that cute are bound to be trouble!

heheheh

Post by **Furls Fire** » Wed Feb 23, 2005 3:02 pm

Ah good. I didn't lose too many with that.

And Jem, I would love to see a pic of your niece.

Fist, my dementia is only second to yours...hehehe

I love you too.

Stephen said once...

"I dance with angels every day, I see the glow of the Heavens all about me, and I hear the Word of the Father whispered always in my ear."

Post by **dlbpharmd** » Wed Feb 23, 2005 7:27 pm

One of them had a vision of Jesus, who told him that all humans are as equal in the eyes of God.

Actually, the Bible says that as well:

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free person, there is not male and female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (Galatians 3:28)

Here's another:

This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. (John 13:35)

Take these two verses together and you can cut the foundation out of any racist, sexist, homophobic argument out there.

Didn't mean to go OT, just thought I'd throw that in there.

Post by **Furls Fire** » Wed Feb 23, 2005 9:07 pm

Amen

Post by **ChoChiyo** » Wed Feb 23, 2005 11:58 pm

Furls, I believe every word.

You amaze me.

How I envy you your peace and vision.

Tell Steven I wish I had known him...and maybe someday I'll meet him in heaven--if I get in.

Post by **Furls Fire** » Fri Feb 25, 2005 1:47 am

HUGGLESSSSSSSSS Cho

And I believe with all my heart that you will definately get there.

God Bless

Post by **Harley Guy** » Sun Feb 27, 2005 4:15 pm

I'll vouch for her dementia. But hey, she's beautiful, so I think I'll stick around.

Okay, serious now. My wife is an angel on earth. And although I do not hear and see the same things she does. I know in my heart that they are there. All I have to do is look at her and know that God exists. I'm the most blessed man in the world.

Post by **Fist and Faith** » Tue Mar 01, 2005 8:41 am

Harley Guy wrote:I'll vouch for her dementia. But hey, she's beautiful, so I think I'll stick around.

I'm gonna like having you around, Russ.

Post by **duchess of malfi** » Sun Mar 06, 2005 6:03 pm

I ran into a quote today that made me think of Furls and her brother, and the surety of the faith that makes up the bedrock of their lives...

Brooks didn't care for the fear part, but she kept that to herself. "Uncle Thomas, how do I know that God loves me?"

He blinked, then replied with a depth of feeling that reached each of them. "Every time you behold the Blue Ridge Mountains, every time you feel a snowflake on your eyelashes, every time you see a frog on a lily pad, every time a friend gives you his hand, Brooks, God loves you. You are surrounded by His love. We look for it in all the wrong places as we pray for worldly success. We say that it must be proof of God's love. Some people pray not for material success but for an easy life." He shook his head. "No, even our pains are a sign of His love, for they will lead you to the right path, if you'll only listen."

~Rita Mae Brown

Post by **Furls Fire** » Tue Mar 08, 2005 2:53 pm

Beautiful Duchy

Well, the first round of chemo is done. Whew, it's no fun that's for sure. Not staying online too long, I just wanted to come and post something in Isaiah's thread. It has been a year since his passing.

Hey Russ, if I'm the crazy one, then what are you? Surely not the voice of reason..

You're beautiful too, I love you.

Post by **Stephen C** » Fri Mar 18, 2005 5:51 am

September 8, 1994 11:56pm

Why is it that in the fog is when the other powers of the world find their way to me? I do not comprehend all the forces that seem to seek me out. I do not understand the lure. And yet, it happens on murky days, devoid of light, when the mist swirls and the sky is lost. I walk in the fog, walk along the city streets, walk the paths of Golden Gate Park. I walk as the mist seeps through my clothes, forces it’s way through my skin and sinks deep within my bones. Chilling me, warning me, asking me why I venture out when I should know I will be found. Sometimes, the warning is unwarranted.

Found I was. Yet I wasn’t sought. Just happened upon. I frightened him. I could tell just by the way he went rigid and his eyes became lidless. His dark pupils dilated as he sat up straighter on the park bench. He stared at me, in fear, and in amazement. His hand shook as he gripped the throat of his coat.

“It’s my time, isn’t it?” He managed. Though his voice barely above a whisper.

“Your time?” I asked. I had no idea what he meant.

“The Angel of Death. You’ve come to take me to where ever you go when it’s the end.”

I smiled at him, shaking my head. “I’m no angel, and I’m certainly not going to take you anywhere. Why would you think that?”

“Because I see it. I see the light that surrounds you. And I feel your peace. I feel your holiness. You are one of His greatest. Ah, wait. Yes, I mistook it. It is just so bright”

He gazed at me, his fear falling away. He stood then and walked up to me. He moved his hands up and down in front me, but did not touch me. He circled around, his hands moving constantly. “It does not burn. It’s cool, yet powerful. It hums. You are holy. But, something is wrong. Very very wrong. Inside the light that surrounds you there is a malice. Yet, it is not you. It is pulsing through you. You are sick, or will be. You will die and you will die in battle.”

“How do you know this?”

“I see it! It corrodes the light! I missed it before because your aura is so brilliant. It hides behind it. Listen to me, Stephen. It will come and it will come hard. It will drown you. And you will fight it, oh yes, you will fight it long and hard. But in the end, you will fail.”

“How do you know my name?”

“Why does that matter? “ He gripped the throat of his coat again. “Stephen, what you are, will be lost to the world. And that is cause for great sadness.”

I turned away from him, searched the fog for comprehension, and found none. There are forces in the world that are beyond me. For all I see, there is a sight that eludes me. It’s the mist. It blinds me in some way and opens the eyes of those other see’ers. I turned back to him and he was smiling.

“Stephen, you are wondrous. Your radiance is unmistakably from God. Your face is the face of an angel. You embody the grace of Heaven. What will befall you is so heart breaking. How will you endure it?”

This I could answer. This I knew. “I will endure it. And I will find my way home when it is done.” I grinned at him then. “What is your name?”

“Joe.” Was all he offered.

“Let’s go somewhere, out of this fog. Have a coffee.”

“I’d like that.”

Post by **Fist and Faith** » Fri Mar 18, 2005 11:21 am

Stephen C wrote:“Stephen, what you are, will be lost to the world. And that is cause for great sadness.”

For all Joe saw, he didn't see Tracie coming here, making sure you were not lost to the world.

Post by **Harley Guy** » Fri Mar 18, 2005 3:09 pm

My brother-in-law blew me away most of the time. To put it simply, he was the calm voice in the storm. Nothing rattled him. Even as a kid, he was just toddler when I met him, but he was so, oh I don't know how to put it, so serene. I was just a kid myself when I saw him for the first time, and Tracie can confirm this, I just stared at him. Because he was just so beautiful. His eyes where like deep crystals and even at only 9 years old, I felt like he could see right through me. He smiled at everyone.

Lost to the world? Never. These journals keep him here as long as people read them. But, they can only convey maybe a 10th of how he was when he was here. His passing is indeed a great loss for the world. As my wife says, a bright light went out September 25, 2001. And I still long for it to return.

Kevin's Watch

Kevin's Watch

Stephen C. McKinney Memorial Thread (1969-2001)