How do you feel today? v. 3.0

[deer of the dawn]

Christmas Eve finds me trying to finish my nonfiction book publishing on CreateSpace. Aaaaaallllmmmooost there. I just want to get the sucker out there, but I am rather perfectionistic... Went through the obligatory "why am I doing this nobody cares" thing this morning. Decided to suck it up and finish what I started, and let it go and move on.

[Sorus]

Anyway, I've had ups and downs.
I've had some satisfaction in my daily work.
And I have more peace with a family member who I just wanted to start a fight with a week ago. ("about what?" me: "oh, anything!")

But there's still this one big, seemingly impossible-to-fix-situation looming up ahead; it's a mess, and it's got me disappointed.

Also, in a different type of wretched feeling, does anyone here ever get like exceptionally super-panicked over fear of failing others? I've tasted that panic again today.

Sometimes you need to accept that there are situations where nothing you do is going to please the person, and there's a limit to how far you should bend over in trying. It's easier said than done, especially with family. I've spent the last week Googling ways to reduce anxiety - which I do every year, with limited success. I don't have the kind of mentality that benefits from yoga or other 'recommended' relaxing activities - I find exertion works better, but there are days when I will go to bed physically and mentally exhausted, and still can't sleep because my mind won't stop spinning. This time of year is always bad. Probably not helpful, except maybe from a 'you're not alone' standpoint.

[Avatar]

Well, merry Christmas Watchers.

Really just another day for me...we don't do tree's or decorations or anything like that.

--A

[Sorus]

FAH-LEEZE KNOBBY DOD.

[Linna Heartbooger]

FAH-LEEZE KNOBBY DOD.

[deer of the dawn]

FAH-LEEZE KNOBBY DOD.

Yo quiero Taco Bell, policey dad.

[Sorus]

FAH-LEEZE KNOBBY DOD.

Yo quiero Taco Bell, policey dad.

And they're still playing Christmas music at work. There ought to be a law.

Santa Baby Lady clearly didn't get what she wanted, probably due to her fundamental misunderstanding of Santa's job description. Perhaps she would have better luck on Craigslist.

[Avatar]

Luckily by the time I'm forced to leave the house again they should have stopped...

--A

[Linna Heartbooger]

Santa Baby Lady clearly didn't get what she wanted, probably due to her fundamental misunderstanding of Santa's job description...

Job description and motivations, on several different levels... yup.


Thanks SD, peter, and Sorus, for identifying with me on those anxieties & frustrations. (that involve people)
I feel like something is required of me in the way of continuing the conversation, but I'm a bit stuck.
Either my vulnerability could only go so far, and then it stopped, or something.

[aTOMiC]

Ugh. After all the decorating and planning and anticipation I am now in full Christmas withdrawal. I was tempted to implement the seldom used family custom of Christmas and a half by saving back a couple of gifts to be opened on New Years Eve but decided against it. Why drag it out just rip it off like a bandaid and deal with it. Now I have a mountain of decorations to carefully place back in their containers starting on New Years Day. I also live in the sort of neighborhood that keeps the holiday lights burning every evening until New Years Eve so I can't dismantle the outdoor display just yet.

Perhaps if I start drinking heavily.

[Linna Heartbooger]

atomic, I feel like there's something wrong with this picture...

...but anyway, how many peeps did you have at your house on Christmas?
What was it like?!

We... flat-out didn't get our tree up this year, (When I knew I was dreading it, I thought of just decorating the top part, but... didn't happen.) so our decorations were kind of like at Av's place.

[aTOMiC]

atomic, I feel like there's something wrong with this picture...

...but anyway, how many peeps did you have at your house on Christmas?
What was it like?!

We... flat-out didn't get our tree up this year, (When I knew I was dreading it, I thought of just decorating the top part, but... didn't happen.) so our decorations were kind of like at Av's place.

Well we had 30 people at our family Christmas party then we followed that up with a National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation viewing party the next weekend so the interior decorations were seen and enjoyed by dozens which made it all worthwhile. As to the outside lights we don't decorate as much as some but probably more than others and there was and still is a steady stream of drivebys through the neighborhood which also makes the effort worth the trouble.

Very sorry to hear about your tree but I realize we don't all celebrate the holidays the same way and you may not miss it as much as I would. BTW we have 8 fully decorated trees throughout the house. One is decorated like a large snowman and have individual themes for all of the rest.
My wife and I like for the house and the party to look and feel like opening a brightly colored toy on Christmas morning. I guess I'm still just a big nerdy kid.

[Sorus]

BTW we have 8 fully decorated trees throughout the house. One is decorated like a large snowman and have individual themes for all of the rest.
My wife and I like for the house and the party to look and feel like opening a brightly colored toy on Christmas morning. I guess I'm still just a big nerdy kid.

Pics? I can't imagine doing all that, but I have seen some pretty decorations and whatnot this year.

As long as there isn't a soundtrack. I was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt yesterday because it was a bank holiday and such - people on the Mothership probably had it off, but it's still playing today.

[Avatar]

...so our decorations were kind of like at Av's place.

You mean non-existent?

Been raining here for the last few days, more on than off. Nice to get a break from the relentless heat.

--A

[aTOMiC]

BTW we have 8 fully decorated trees throughout the house. One is decorated like a large snowman and have individual themes for all of the rest.
My wife and I like for the house and the party to look and feel like opening a brightly colored toy on Christmas morning. I guess I'm still just a big nerdy kid.

Pics? I can't imagine doing all that, but I have seen some pretty decorations and whatnot this year.

I suppose this ought to be in a "Show us your Christmas decorations" thread but here goes...


This one is our "Old Fashioned" tree. Mostly traditional decorations and faux C-9 bulbs.


Here is the "Snowman" tree. Pic is a little dark. Its much lighter when all the other lights in the room are turned on.


Here we have the "Candy Cane or Red and White" tree.


This is the "Winterscape" tree.


This is the "Rotating" tree in our master bedroom. Its hard to tell that its rotating in a still photo.


This is the main "Family or Big" tree. Largest of the bunch at 9'.


This is the "Red and Gold" tree in our family room.


Here is the tree in my office or man cave. Its covered with Star Trek, Star Wars and Super Hero ornaments plus the tree train.


Snap shot of the outside of the house. We live on a corner so there is more stuff on the other side and in the back.

[Sorus]

I like the "Winterscape" and the "Snowman", though my inner geek would probably gravitate towards the Star Trek one if I could see it more closely. The train is neat. Actually, the only Christmas ornament I own is Star Trek themed - I used to have it hanging over my desk, until I ran into some technical difficulties. The outdoor lights are pretty awesome too.




"Technical difficulties."

"You say 'That's not a cat toy!', yet I am playing with it, so you are obviously wrong."

[aTOMiC]

Ah I see. This must be a scene from the sequel to the Original Series episode "Catspaw". Instead of the Enterprise being locked in a block of transparent Lucite it has its nacelle crushed by a giant space cat.

[Sorus]

That is correct. It was (fortunately) never actually filmed.

Who needs warp speed? I do everything on impulse!

I never actually said that!

Uhh...

Is it Friday yet?

[Avatar]

No, luckily. Damn...just a few more days before I go back to work.

Nice pics TOM. The inside is mad, but at least the outside lights are relatively tasteful.

In other news, my new mouse got delivered yesterday. I didn't want to buy a new mouse. I bought one near the beginning of this year, and I was just starting to get into it, and actually use the programmable buttons and profiles and stuff for games.

Then the scroll wheel button stopped working. It still clicks, but nothing happens unless you apply an unreasonable amount of force, with serious risk of slippage, which is not practical.

So I bought a new one. Still a budget one, so I'll probably have to replace it in another year, but quite nice. Variable DPI, non-slip surface, adjustable weight.

However, I've had to resort to 3rd party software to programme the extra buttons. And it's lit by a lurid red LED which stays on at all times, even when the computer is off.

(Whatever happened to your keyboard Sorus? )

Since it's brand new, I'm loathe to open it up to disconnect the LED, but I might have to.

--A

[Sorus]

(Whatever happened to your keyboard Sorus? )

I ended up having to replace it. Bought the Razer Blackwidow - which is nice, very customizable (stupid Firefox spellcheck, that is too a word). I spend enough time on my computer that I need to be comfortable with my mouse and keyboard, though I couldn't justify the extra $30 or so for the 'Chroma' version, which has full color customization (which apparently is a word) of the keys, so you can program your guild's colors or a rainbow or whatever. The standard version is just green, though you can control the brightness and a few other settings - some useful, some not-so-much. (You can make the lights twinkle like stars, which is cool for about the first 5 seconds, and obnoxious and distracting after.) The main thing I miss from my old keyboard was the little window at the top that you could program to show who was talking on Ventrilo. I couldn't find any that had that, even in the models that were out of my price range.