Oh criminey...

Learn how to make Spring Wine and aliantha cookies.

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Menolly
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Post by Menolly »

Oh G-ds...you guys are so bad... :haha:

Jenn, I am so sorry... ;)
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Post by Avatar »

ROTFLMAO.

Good thing you poked holes in it. Otherwise, I think it might explode. (This is NOT a suggestion.)

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Cameraman Jenn
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Post by Cameraman Jenn »

Balon, you are in BIG trouble if I get home today and find my kitchen full of exploded ivory soap.... :evil:
Now if I could just find a way to wear live bees as jewelry all the time.....

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bloodguard bob
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Post by bloodguard bob »

well it'll surely get the smell out of the microwave, eh balon? ;)
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Post by Wyldewode »

:lol: Sooo funny!

Closest thing I have to this experience was when I made a big pan of baklava--loads of tiresome buttering layers and layers of phyllo dough, plus cost well over $15 to make the pan of goodness. . . I baked the thing up, and while it was finishing up I made a syrup of honey, water and sugar on the stove top. Well. . . I finished with the syrup, and took the baklava out to cool for the requisite time. When the allotted time was up I poured the syrup over the cut baklava, only to have the warm syrup BOIL as I poured it on! I just looked at it for a minute before it registered that the baklava shouldn't be so hot. I looked down at the stove top controls, and found that I had left the burner on low when I had made the syrup. Of course I had set pan of baklava on top of THAT burner. I had baked it in a glass 9x13 pan, and when I picked up the pan to look, I saw a carbonized patch on the bottom shaped EXACTLY like the burner. :roll:

I took it out of the pan and salvaged the decent part. I served it to a group of friends who claimed it was the best they had ever eaten--and TWO of them are from the Middle East. :oops: Of course, it tasted burnt to me! Ah well. . . you live and you remember to set out trivets the next time you bake! :biggrin:
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balon!
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Post by balon! »

bloodguard bob wrote:well it'll surely get the smell out of the microwave, eh balon? ;)
:haha:

THATS what I was thinking! :D
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Post by bloodguard bob »

so....
what happens?
explosions? light show? did your microwave come to life? were there lots of bubbles and lights like cirque du soleil?
no, nevermind. i want to find out for myself.
ok, just tell me a little, what happens after how long.

*place mad scientist emoticon here*
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Post by Menolly »

bloodguard bob wrote:so....
what happens?
explosions? light show? did your microwave come to life? were there lots of bubbles and lights like cirque du soleil?
no, nevermind. i want to find out for myself.
ok, just tell me a little, what happens after how long.

*place mad scientist emoticon here*
Uh...Jenn? Jeh-ennn?? JENN!!!
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Post by Sunbaneglasses »

Should I mention that if you set a plate on a stove eye and turn it on high that in a minute or two the plate will explode causing searing hot shards of plate to embed in the walls and floors up to 15 feet away? I know this for a fact.
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Post by balon! »

Sunbaneglasses wrote:Should I mention that if you set a plate on a stove eye and turn it on high that in a minute or two the plate will explode causing searing hot shards of plate to embed in the walls and floors up to 15 feet away? I know this for a fact.
:haha:

I need to try THAT one too.

Ohh, and here ya go BGB:

A Video

Put it in for about two minutes. It's AWSOME.
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Post by Menolly »

Balon, Balon, Balon...

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BGB, you do know better than that, right?

::: of course, I can't see the video, so I have no idea what actually happens to the Ivory soap:::
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Post by bloodguard bob »

Menolly, i intend to film it so maybe, somehow i can get it to you that way :twisted:
thanks again Balon, you rock.
Heres another one:if you put even a little bit of sugar into a pan and put it on the stove once it carbonizes it eats straight through the metal.
Now if you're like me and want to try this at home i suggest not to. you just lose a pan and fill the house with nastiness.
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Post by Cameraman Jenn »

Dammit, BGB, you have the video, why oh why oh why do you still need to do it yourself! Didn't you hear the woman's voice say, "It smells" ????? GRRRRRRRRR...... :evil:
Now if I could just find a way to wear live bees as jewelry all the time.....

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Post by Menolly »

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I tried Jenn. Honestly.

I still think perhaps the microwave should stay locked in the trunk of your car, except when needed...
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Post by stonemaybe »

:LOLS:

Funny thread!

Can't think of any funny kitchen disasters at the minute, only nasty-tasting ones.

But then again, memory is not my greatest talent....
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Post by aliantha »

Oh gods, this is funny stuff.... :haha:

The next-to-last place we lived in had a nice, new gas stove with automatic ignition -- no pilot lights. The last place we lived in had (at first) an old stove with pilot lights (later they replaced the stove). The old crappy stove had holes in the stovetop so you could see whether the pilot light was lit. Right after we moved in, I kept forgetting about the pilots and putting stuff on top of the holes. I've got a lovely round melted spot in the lid to one of my plastic microwave-cooking dishes, and a charred spot on the bottom of my bread basket. Of course, the girls thought it was hysterical.... I'm trying to be mindful of that now, since the new place has my first-ever electric stove, but I'm sure I'll have another casualty for the list shortly.

The exploding Pyrex reminded me of why we don't let Batty loose in the kitchen much. One night when we were living in the next-to-last place -- she was in middle school, I think -- I discovered melted goo and shards of glass in the tray under the stovetop. She had tried to melt sugar on the stove in a glass Nutella jar. Lucky for her, the jar just shattered without shooting shrapnel. The girls cleaned up the mess they could see, so that Mom wouldn't know, but they didn't think to lift the stovetop. I asked Batty why she hadn't used a pan, instead of, y'know, trying to cook in a glass jar on an open flame, and she just sort of blinked at me. :roll:
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Menolly
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Post by Menolly »

Welcome to the Galley, aliantha!!

My biggest warning regarding electric stoves, if it's the older coil type and not induction, is to always double check if the coil is on before touching the coil to lift it to clean the drip pan underneath or what not. On the lower settings, the coil may not glow red at all and severe burns can happen pretty easily.

:::so speaks she who did such multiple times while learning to cook as a kid:::
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Post by Cameraman Jenn »

Well, looks like today is BGB's first unsupervised time in the kitchen and he's already armed with Ivory soap..... :evil:
Now if I could just find a way to wear live bees as jewelry all the time.....

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Post by aliantha »

OMG, Jenn, I'm so sorry....

Yes, Menolly, it's the old-fashioned coil type. I've been trying to stay pretty conscious of the hot-coil issue -- doing the old Girl Scout campfire test (if it's cool to the palm of your hand, then it's cool enough to go to bed -- or in this case, cool enough to put something else on the burner). But I'm sure I'll screw up eventually....
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Post by bloodguard bob »

CMJ and i got a three-pack of Ivory and she seems to have misplaced it while puttin away the groceries.
hrmm....
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