How do you feel today?

[Lord of the Gyre]

Monday. Bleh.

--A

Couldn't have said it better if I were SRD myself.

[Cameraman Jenn]

Meant to run some errands. Felt too lazy. Did get a jean jacket at goodwill though and I am going to customize it with bee stuff. Chris gave me a cute bee t-shirt that is too big so I am going to make patches out of the bee images and sew them on my jacket. Should be fun collecting bee patches and so forth. Found a cute very 70's esque olive brown cloth jacket with big brown leather woven buttons and a rounded suit jacket style collar as well. I only spent 14 bucks on the both so I figure I scored. I'll do laundry on Wednesday so I'll wash em up and start working on decorating the jean jacket. I hung out at the cafe a bit and yammered with Mollison about mac computers and other stuff then Mike came in and was down in the dumps about a friend of his and so we talked about that and he felt much better afterwards. It was a nice quiet day off which I really needed.

[lorin]

I am a little numb today, don't know how to react to what just happened. Would not mind a little feedback.

As you all know by now, I have/had three badass fosterkids. They were in my home for the last 9 years. I had a specific plan how I was going to 'exit' them out so the street did not eat them alive. The problem with being IN the social service field and working as a foster parent is you have little tolerance for incompetence. I was a pain in the ass to the agency, someone that they could not just ignore and someone who wasnt just sitting there waiting for the board check. I have a long history of ensuring these kids get everything they needed to step into the world.

Anyway, last month the last kid graduated from highschool, the other two got their degrees and moved on. She is a little badass, gangster wannabe who I kept a very tight reign on. The kid is learning disabled and I was working with a recruiter to get her into the coast guard so she would have a little time to grow up and remain under some kind of structure. So when the high school degree came in the mail, I sent a copy to the agency for their file. One day after the agency received the degree I received an email stating that they noticed I hadn't submitted my medical exam paper. They said if I didn't have it in tomorrow they were closing my home. ONE day. I did get it done and it went in four days after the email. But they sent me an email stating that my home was now closed and Keisha was forbidden to return to my home. They placed her in a group home.

Clearly they were waiting for me to get her out of highschool. They need that stats saying they have such and such amount of high school graduates. I have no problem moving her out, I am exhausted and done, but I wanted to transition her into another structured environment so she had a chance to grow up. Now they have moved her into a group home in the worst part of the Bronx with a bunch of nonworking badass kids.

She has been in my home for 9 years, goes to visit her family in NYC and is told she is forbidden to return to my home because I didn't get a physical in time.

My reactions are all over the place. In a way it takes the burden off of me, but on the other hand this is not good for this kid.

[aliantha]

That is absolutely ridiculous, lorin. Can you fight this in any way? I assume this was their first notice to you -- could you argue it with somebody that giving you one day's notice to correct a violation is unreasonable?

(Shadow question: do you *want* to fight it? Because in your position, I'll be honest, I'd be tempted to just give up...)

I cannot believe, tho, that your work with her for the past nine years won't help her weather her current situation. Fingers crossed....

EDIT: Oh yeah, got back from Roanoke last night. I was all set to sleep in this morning, but the cat woke me up. Now I actually have to do all the stuff I said I was gonna do this week...

[danlo]

Write your frigging Congressman right away, call, show up on his/her doorstep!

Better yet--it a state thing isn't it? Do the exact same to your state rep.

[Menolly]

{{{lorin}}}
No advice sweetie, but I understand caring and wanting to help her transition, even if she appears to be resisting you all the way.

As ali says, if you want to fight this, I am sure you, if anyone, can and will win.

[Savor Dam]

Two out of three is not so bad...you can still feel great pride in what you did for the two older ones.

Unless I am not following the long-term story correctly, you had reached your limit with Keisha some months ago after a series of very poor choices on her part, each of which either brought you very personal emotional pain or were destructive to the home you had made for her. Apparently you took her in again.

She has been in your care half her life. She is now a high-school graduate (which hopefully implies some level of achievement, not merely aging-out of the school system) and presumably has reached her eighteenth birthday. At some point, you have to let her live by her choices.

Even if she is not allowed to live with you, surely she can choose to communicate with you and accept your guidance. If she does, by all means help her get into the Coast Guard or some other structured environment so she can finish the transition to responsible adulthood.

If, after all you have done, she does not so choose...she has to live out her fate. You have done more than could ever be expected for her. It is not your fault if she turns her back on this and chooses to sink back into that life.

Should she take that path...hopefully, she will survive to see the error of her choices and how much she gave up thereby. G-d's Gate of Tears will always be an option for her.

[Cameraman Jenn]

Not quite sure what to say on that one Lorin. All I have to offer you are hugs and plenty of them.

Today was a tough day. Shorthanded at work and schedules all jacked up because Mary needed to switch which is why I even worked today at all. Hardly got anything done and yet I realized what a dork I am because lately I've been reading some chrons and I found myself in the height of my heavy freight slinging labors muttering, "Melenkurion Abatha Duroc Minas Mill Harad Khabaal." under my breath like a mantra. I can tell it's going to be another long week because I've only worked two days so far and I am already at 18 hour and fifteen minutes.

[Orlion]

Just checked out the local library today. It's terrific! Why have sections devoted to science fiction and literature when you can have a whole library full of romance novels! Well, at least there's free internet access, if I'm here during hours...and if I can handle its slow speed...

[aliantha]

Just checked out the local library today. It's terrific! Why have sections devoted to science fiction and literature when you can have a whole library full of romance novels! Well, at least there's free internet access, if I'm here during hours...and if I can handle its slow speed...

I have a similar problem at my local branch. One tiny set of shelves of SF/F and a crap-ton of audio books. A bunch of fantasy titles are lurking in Young Adult.... Makes me sad -- I was *so* excited to have a library branch within walking distance and there's almost nothing there I'm interested in reading.

[Menolly]

Interlibrary Loan is a g-desend in such situations...
You can honestly request any book, and they will seriously try to get it in for you.

[aliantha]

I know. I could also drive to a different branch, or to a library in a neighboring jurisdiction for which I have a card. It's just that it was a letdown.

[Savor Dam]

What they have on their shelves is influenced by what they have demand for. Interlibrary loan requests for what you want to be reading will help influence them to stock more of that sort of literature...at least marginally.

[lorin]

tuesday
bankruptcy lawyers
foreclosure
fostercare workers
hurricanes on the way

it's a scarey day when my job is the least stressful part of my day.....

tw - I love this place and the people on this site - it seems to be the only safe place for me to run and hide. thank you, everyone.

[aliantha]

What they have on their shelves is influenced by what they have demand for. Interlibrary loan requests for what you want to be reading will help influence them to stock more of that sort of literature...at least marginally.

Hmm, I suppose that's true. Assuming they have any sort of budget at all for new books this year. I'll have to check and see whether they charge for ILL between branches -- I used to live in a city that did that. It was, like, $1 per book, but still.

<edited to cover poor typing skills>

[Menolly]

Ouch!
Gator Town's gives you a choice if you are willing to pay or not on the ILL request form. I always mark "no," and still have not waited that long for my requests.

[aliantha]

So the dollar pays for "express shipping"?

In other news, I cleaned the house today. I'm embarrassed to admit the last time the place had a thorough cleaning. Suffice it to say that Magickmaker was not yet home for the summer. I should do laundry, too....

[Menolly]

Well no, not express "shipping."
It just seems that way, as I think the choices of where they can request a loan from is more broad, so has a chance of being filled sooner.
...I think.

[sgt.null]

well julie will be at work tomorrow. other than a retirement party i will be able to catch up on my writing. polish last weeks submission and check this week's prompt. she still gets fatigued but takes longer. got her last antibiotic today so that should knock it out. we hope.

[Avatar]

I love the internet. Did my tax return online night before last, took me 10 minutes. 24 hours later I got my assessment. (And I'm actually owed a rebate. )

--A