I've finished reading the Sherman Alexie short story collection,
The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven, about life on the Spokane Indian reservation. Some good stuff, some things even poetic and uplifting, but also lots of alcoholism and depression pictured.
One of the short stories that has stuck with me, entitled "The Approximate Size of My Favorite Tumor", concerns the way a character called James Many Horses handles the news of his terminal lung cancer by joking a lot, which upsets his wife Norma enough (though she never minded about him joking about her being unable to have children) that she leaves him while he's still hospitalized.
Here's the conclusion of that Alexie short story:
The hospital released me because they decided I would be much more comfortable at home. And there I was, at home, writing letters to my loved ones on special reservation stationery that read: FROM THE DEATH BED OF JAMES MANY HORSES III.
But in reality, I sat at my kitchen table to write, and DEATH TABLE just doesn't have the necessary music. I'm also the only James Many Horses, but there is a certain dignity to any kind of artificial tradition.
Anyway, I sat there at the death table, writing letters from my death bed, when there was a knock on the door.
"Come in," I yelled, knowing the door was locked, and smiling when it rattled against the frame.
"It's locked," a familiar voice said, and it was a female voice I recognized..
"Norma?" I asked as I unlocked and opened the door.
She was beautiful. She had either gained or lost twenty pounds, one braid hung down a little longer than the other and she had ironed her shirt until the creases were sharp.
"Honey," she said. "I'm home!"
I was silent. That was a rare event.
"Honey," she said. "I've been gone so long and I missed you so much. But now I'm back. Where I belong."
I had to smile.
"Where are the kids?" she asked.
"They're asleep," I said, recovered just in time to continue the joke.
"Poor little guys tried to stay awake, you know? They wanted to be up when yo got home. But, one by one, they dropped off, fell asleep, and I had to carry them off into their little beds."
"Well." Norma said. "I'll just go in and kiss them quietly. Tell them how much I love them. Fix the sheets and blankets so they'll be warm all night."
She smiled.
"Jimmy," she said. "You look like shit."
"Yeah, I know."
"I'm sorry I left."
"Where've you been?" I asked, though I really didn't want to know.
"In Arlee. Lived with a Flathead cousin of mine."
"Cousin as in cousin? Or cousin as in I-was-fucking-him-but-don't-want-to-tell-you-because-you're-dying?"
She smiled even though she didn't want to.
"Well," she said. "I guess you'd call him more of that second kind of cousin."
Believe me: nothing ever hurt more. Not even my tumors which are the approximate size of baseballs.
"Why'd you come back?" I asked her.
She looked at me, tried to suppress a giggle, then broke out into full-fledged laughter. I joined her.
"Well," I asked her again after a while. "Why'd you come back?"
She turned stoic, gave me that beautiful Tonto face, and said, "Because he was so fucking serious about everything."
We laughed a little more and then I asked her one more time, "Really, why'd you come back?"
"Because someone needs to help you die the right way," she said. "And we both know that dying ain't something you ever done before."
I had to agree with that.
"And maybe," she said, "because making fry bread and helping people die are the last two things Indians are good at."
"Well," I said. "At least you're good at one of them."
And we laughed.
This passage represents the book well, with the mixture of laughter and pain, dreams and despair. I kind of liked it.