Put what's left of your hands where I can see them

[Sheriff Lytton]

Hi. I am new to this forum, but eventually will not be.

I have been persecuting lepers for some time now.

My hobbies include persecuting lepers, eating doughnuts and persecuting lepers.

Say, you haven't got leprosy have you ? Looks like you're walking the rest of the way home.

[Reisheiruhime]

Well, dearie, I happen to want to kill that leper, so I don't think we'll have any trouble. *cheeky wink*

Allow me to introduce myself. I am Turiya Foul, head lady of the Foul Fortress, and you, sweetling, are a subordinate. I hope you will feel free to persecute any and all lepers you meet here.

-TF

[Sheriff Lytton]

My, what an agressive lady you are. I think I like the way you think. Have you ever considered a career in law enforcement or federal government ?

[Reisheiruhime]

Who do you think is possessing the head of the MIB? Moi, of course. And of course you like the way I think. Great minds think alike.

So. Wanna get some doughnuts and coffee? I know a great place just down the road....

[Sheriff Lytton]

Let's give it a go. I'll put the siren on so we don't have to wait at the lights. Are there any lepers there ?

[Reisheiruhime]

Well, sometimes we bring them in through the basement using surplus contamination materials for..... Remember, governmentally, I outrank you, and you cannot arrest me. We use alien experimantal technology on them. They usually explode.

Marie's has a special on radioactive doughnuts. Wanna try?

[Sheriff Lytton]

It's a date. I'm more than willing to try, I hear the "Strontium Special" is pretty good, although I've heard the neutronium doughnuts can be a little on the heavy side.

Can we swing past your place and get a leper from the basement first though ? I'm getting leper homicide withdrawal.

I just shot a man for having acne, but it wasn't the same. (It's ok, I told the DA he was a commie - there'll be no comeback)

[Reisheiruhime]

Great. I have a plan to kidnap a leper that really annoys us both, but I must first convince the President that my digger-drill does not belong in Iraq. Can you settle for a hermitous smelly leper? When they explode, they make funny sounds.

You know, I've a friend who's in charge of the AAP (Attourney's Association Payroll) And he can get one of "our people" - talking in code here - to replace the DA that might "just happen" to go missing if he interferes with our most noble and ancient cause.

[Sheriff Lytton]

Excellent thinking. Ok then, a hermitous smelly leper it is. Once we've finished amusing ourselves, we could stamp up and down in the resulting puddle licking our lips, as is the way of "our people".

Well, if you can take care of the DA, I can take care of Georgie Boy from number 1600. After all, I have plenty of crayons and dog biscuits, it should be a cinch. (Although I hear Rumsfeld is definitely one of "our people")

[Reisheiruhime]

Mmmkay! Let's stop all the wonderful chatter and get to it.

[Sheriff Lytton]

I like traffic lights, I... Oh God