Well said, dlb. I was struggling to think of how to say it. As though we weren't fond of Edge as it was! Brian, fantastic job with these two av's!!!
I'm forced to admit that Stephen's journal entries don't have the same drama for me as they used to. The thing is, I'm just not worried about him. "Is that your only answer?" indeed! Or maybe, "Is that the best you can do?" Don't make me laugh, Harold. Stephen gets physically ill when Harold's around, so it's worse for him than for me. For me, I just see an angry guy wasting his time trying to knock down a mountain with hammer.
Stephen C. McKinney Memorial Thread (1969-2001)
Moderators: deer of the dawn, Furls Fire
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Fist and Faith
- Magister Vitae
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Thank you. 
I just wanted to say something about the faint text on Isaiah's avatar. When I was busy making it, I had the impulse to look up the meaning of his name - and I was so struck by it I had to use it in the av: "salvation of the Lord".
I just wanted to say something about the faint text on Isaiah's avatar. When I was busy making it, I had the impulse to look up the meaning of his name - and I was so struck by it I had to use it in the av: "salvation of the Lord".
Check out my digital art at www.brian.co.za
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Fist and Faith
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Extremely cool, Edge. And appropriate. When Isaiah started posting here, and chatting with us, he said things about not believing, and anger regarding religious matters. But it was also obvious that he wanted his faith restored. He felt one way, but had been taught - by some horrible people - another way. I was so glad that he met Tracie, so he could feel whole again. He learned a new kind of God and a new kind of love, and I'm sure he felt salvation.
All lies and jest
Still a man hears what he wants to hear
And disregards the rest -Paul Simon
Still a man hears what he wants to hear
And disregards the rest -Paul Simon
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Furls Fire
- Lord
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- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
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I love the avs. LOVE THEM! And I'm sure both Stephen and Isaiah would have loved them too. The way you superimposed Stephen's face into the background of his av just stopped my heart. I'm an emotional mess right now because it touched me so deeply. You captured my brother's essence with that av, Brian. You truly did.
I tell myself, "it's silly to get all weepy over an avatar for a message board." But, you know, it's more than that. Because Stephen's presence here is so overwhelming.
And Brian, I love that hymn. Thank you so much for posting it here.
Eric, I have one more entry to share about Harold, but in that one Stephen doesn't talk to him. It's an entry he wrote after he found out Harold commited suicide. It's not a "good" entry, because in it, Stephen is very hard on himself for "failing" Harold and God. When I said Harold almost cost Stephen his faith, this is the entry I was talking about. I will type it up soon.
Peace
I tell myself, "it's silly to get all weepy over an avatar for a message board." But, you know, it's more than that. Because Stephen's presence here is so overwhelming.
And Brian, I love that hymn. Thank you so much for posting it here.
Eric, I have one more entry to share about Harold, but in that one Stephen doesn't talk to him. It's an entry he wrote after he found out Harold commited suicide. It's not a "good" entry, because in it, Stephen is very hard on himself for "failing" Harold and God. When I said Harold almost cost Stephen his faith, this is the entry I was talking about. I will type it up soon.
Peace
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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Furls Fire
- Lord
- Posts: 4872
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
- Location: Heaven
That he did. It was Stephen who restored his faith. And the love he felt here. When I brought him here, it was like a long lost member of our family was finally home. We had such a short time with him. But in that time, years of lonliness and sadness and self-loathing were melted away. He found love and peace and the Father. And passed on with a full heart.Fist and Faith wrote:Extremely cool, Edge. And appropriate. When Isaiah started posting here, and chatting with us, he said things about not believing, and anger regarding religious matters. But it was also obvious that he wanted his faith restored. He felt one way, but had been taught - by some horrible people - another way. I was so glad that he met Tracie, so he could feel whole again. He learned a new kind of God and a new kind of love, and I'm sure he felt salvation.
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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duchess of malfi
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 11104
- Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2002 9:20 pm
- Location: Michigan, USA
And Shadow's story was and is beautiful, and filled with profound joy.Joy is in the ears that hear.
Whenever I think of him, I feel a mixture of that profound joy -- of a man who found his family and friends -- and great sorrow over losing him all too soon. 
And there can never be enough mere words to describe Stephen.
Edge's avatars are fantastic, and fit those two wonderful men very well.
Love as thou wilt.
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variol son
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 5777
- Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2002 1:07 pm
- Location: New Zealand
Thank you very much for such a wonderful contribution to this wonderful place Edge.
Sum sui generis
Vs
Sum sui generis
Vs
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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Furls Fire
- Lord
- Posts: 4872
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
- Location: Heaven
Isaiah's doesn't seem to be working
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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variol son
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 5777
- Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2002 1:07 pm
- Location: New Zealand
That's odd. I can still see it.
Sum sui generis
Vs
Sum sui generis
Vs
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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Avatar
- Immanentizing The Eschaton
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- Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2004 9:17 am
- Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
- Has thanked: 25 times
- Been thanked: 32 times
- Contact:
As I've mentioned elsewhere, I've tended to avoid this thread. Not for any particular reason, save that it seemed such a personal thing between those Members who were fortunate enough to know Stephen.
However, clicking randomly the other day, I happened across those two journal entries that Furls posted most recently, and I'm struck by a passing thought. Please bear in mind that I have not read back to find other references to "Harold", but nonetheless, I'll share my thought.
It seems to me that perhaps Stephen had not realised that as much as he felt he was being tested by this person, or by god, or satan in the form of this person perhaps, Harold was also testing himself against Stephen. He was measuring his own strength, of his convictions, of his lack of faith, against those of Stephen. In the end, it was not Stephen who failed, but Harold.
Nobody can steal someones faith, or their hope. They can be taken only after despair causes surrender.
However, clicking randomly the other day, I happened across those two journal entries that Furls posted most recently, and I'm struck by a passing thought. Please bear in mind that I have not read back to find other references to "Harold", but nonetheless, I'll share my thought.
It seems to me that perhaps Stephen had not realised that as much as he felt he was being tested by this person, or by god, or satan in the form of this person perhaps, Harold was also testing himself against Stephen. He was measuring his own strength, of his convictions, of his lack of faith, against those of Stephen. In the end, it was not Stephen who failed, but Harold.
Nobody can steal someones faith, or their hope. They can be taken only after despair causes surrender.
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variol son
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 5777
- Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2002 1:07 pm
- Location: New Zealand
I need to re-read the whole thread again, so I cannot really respond to your comment about Stephen and Harold.
However I will say this: please do not be wary of coming here. Neither Fist nor duchess nor I knew Stephen. In fact, the only two members who did are Furls Fire and Fire Daughter.
Yet something of Stephen's story, and Isaiah's, has captured me, and many others as well. I invite you to take this journey with us and get to know Stephen, even if only in part, as we have done.
Sum sui generis
Vs
However I will say this: please do not be wary of coming here. Neither Fist nor duchess nor I knew Stephen. In fact, the only two members who did are Furls Fire and Fire Daughter.
Yet something of Stephen's story, and Isaiah's, has captured me, and many others as well. I invite you to take this journey with us and get to know Stephen, even if only in part, as we have done.
Sum sui generis
Vs
You do not hear, and so you cannot be redeemed.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
In the name of their ancient pride and humiliation, they had made commitments with no possible outcome except bereavement.
He knew only that they had never striven to reject the boundaries of themselves.
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Furls Fire
- Lord
- Posts: 4872
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
- Location: Heaven
Welcome here Avatar
As Luke has said, no one here actually "knew" Stephen until I started mentioning him. He passed on in Sept of 2001 after a long battle with AIDS.
Something compelled me to start sharing his journal here. I've come to realize that it was Stephen himself who guided me to do it. Isaiah alone lifts any doubt of that. "In the beginning" (hehehe) I started a thread here called "Some of my brother's writings" (just a thread or two below this one). The few poems and journal entries I posted there invoked so much emotional response from everyone that it was suggested I create an ID for him and start posting them under his name. I did this and then created this beautiful thread. It's been here over a year now. Growing at a rate that still astounds me. SRD himself has been here.
All are welcome here, Avatar. Stephen is my gift to the Watch. And as you get to know him, you will understand what a gift he was to this world. And my family was the blessed one God gave him too.
And Harold, sigh, Harold was not a test God sent to him. Harold was a tool sent by Satan to do him in and Stephen knew this. Harold did fail, but Stephen came away from it wounded. It took him a while to acknowlege he did all he could. It was this encounter that shaped the way Stephen helped others, like Nathan.
Peace
As Luke has said, no one here actually "knew" Stephen until I started mentioning him. He passed on in Sept of 2001 after a long battle with AIDS.
Something compelled me to start sharing his journal here. I've come to realize that it was Stephen himself who guided me to do it. Isaiah alone lifts any doubt of that. "In the beginning" (hehehe) I started a thread here called "Some of my brother's writings" (just a thread or two below this one). The few poems and journal entries I posted there invoked so much emotional response from everyone that it was suggested I create an ID for him and start posting them under his name. I did this and then created this beautiful thread. It's been here over a year now. Growing at a rate that still astounds me. SRD himself has been here.
All are welcome here, Avatar. Stephen is my gift to the Watch. And as you get to know him, you will understand what a gift he was to this world. And my family was the blessed one God gave him too.
And Harold, sigh, Harold was not a test God sent to him. Harold was a tool sent by Satan to do him in and Stephen knew this. Harold did fail, but Stephen came away from it wounded. It took him a while to acknowlege he did all he could. It was this encounter that shaped the way Stephen helped others, like Nathan.
Peace
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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Fire Daughter
- <i>Haruchai</i>
- Posts: 635
- Joined: Tue Jun 15, 2004 2:06 pm
- Location: Revelstone
You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you.
In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
Until I see you again.
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you.
In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
Until I see you again.
For Myles--
When evening shadows and the stars appear
And there is no one to dry your tears
I could hold you for a million years
To make you feel my love
For Mom--
Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly...fly high against the sky...
Thank you, thank you, thank God for you
The wind beneath my wings
When evening shadows and the stars appear
And there is no one to dry your tears
I could hold you for a million years
To make you feel my love
For Mom--
Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly...fly high against the sky...
Thank you, thank you, thank God for you
The wind beneath my wings
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Furls Fire
- Lord
- Posts: 4872
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
- Location: Heaven
Here's a new pic of Stevie, 6 months old tomorrow!!
What gifts the Lord bestows
What gifts the Lord bestows
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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Gadget nee Jemcheeta
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 2040
- Joined: Wed Oct 06, 2004 2:05 pm
- Location: Cleveland
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duchess of malfi
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 11104
- Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2002 9:20 pm
- Location: Michigan, USA
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Furls Fire
- Lord
- Posts: 4872
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:35 am
- Location: Heaven
He's such an easy baby too. Happy happy happy all the time. Alot of that is because all his brothers and sisters keep him very busy all day long.
And I believe in you
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
altho you never asked me too
I will remember you
and what life put you thru.
~fly fly little wing, fly where only angels sing~
~this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you~
...for then I could fly away and be at rest. Sweet rest, Mom. We all love and miss you.
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The Leper Fairy
- The Gap Into Spam
- Posts: 2795
- Joined: Sat Nov 30, 2002 6:42 pm
